The question is simple... which do you believe is a worse situation to be in? To know what you want and never be able to have it, or to be given the option to have anything, but never know WHAT you want?
Poll: Never know or never want?
- Thread starter Chessrook44
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This is a question with far more dynamics than simple binary choice. I will answer in the form of lyrics to one of my songs.
My goals are covered in moss
My mistakes, they've all been glossed
As far as I can tell I'm not breaking any laws
But it's just me, don't be alarmed
Because this is no time to be afraid
of the things you like, you had better claim them
And what if you should want it all
maybe that's what I want
What I need, I carry it with me
and what I don't, I have no problems leaving
Maybe I could use more sleep
if you could, then would you, sweep me off my feet
Because I know it's hard, Damn hard to believe
that everything I ever wanted is gone
and that maybe that's how I want it
How I want
What I want
All that I want
is just a want
My goals are covered in moss
My mistakes, they've all been glossed
As far as I can tell I'm not breaking any laws
But it's just me, don't be alarmed
Because this is no time to be afraid
of the things you like, you had better claim them
And what if you should want it all
maybe that's what I want
What I need, I carry it with me
and what I don't, I have no problems leaving
Maybe I could use more sleep
if you could, then would you, sweep me off my feet
Because I know it's hard, Damn hard to believe
that everything I ever wanted is gone
and that maybe that's how I want it
How I want
What I want
All that I want
is just a want
option 2 and i know so because that's the position i am in.
back when i knew what i wanted (shiny car, nice house etc) and couldn't have it i could at least approximate something less and be somewhat happy, the human mind thrives on goal setting and achievements but having no direction and no goals is depressing.
back when i knew what i wanted (shiny car, nice house etc) and couldn't have it i could at least approximate something less and be somewhat happy, the human mind thrives on goal setting and achievements but having no direction and no goals is depressing.
Never knowing what I want is worse. At least if I know and can never have, I'm in essentially the same position but there's at least some closure.
I'm going to go with never knowing what you want as being worse.
If you can't have what you want then you will more than likely come to terms with not having it at some point and then move on to wanting something else. Not knowing what you want however feels like there's an insatiable void in your life, also I believe it is much harder to resolve not knowing what you want than not having what you want.
If you can't have what you want then you will more than likely come to terms with not having it at some point and then move on to wanting something else. Not knowing what you want however feels like there's an insatiable void in your life, also I believe it is much harder to resolve not knowing what you want than not having what you want.
Never Have at least give you a goal and something to dream about. Never know is just emptiness all the time.
Never knowing is worse, personally indecision drives me nuts (though there is a difference between not having a preference and indecision for me)
Backing up my choice is this article: http://lifehacker.com/why-thinking-about-buying-something-makes-you-happier-t-513099530
Backing up my choice is this article: http://lifehacker.com/why-thinking-about-buying-something-makes-you-happier-t-513099530
I already don't know what I want, apart from an occasional new game coming out, and to not lose my motorcycle. Otherwise, yea...so I'd rather have anything but not know what I want. Because 'anything' can also mean "Give me a new house so I can give it to my friend, getting him out of some financial problems."
The second option for sure. I'm stuck in the first option and it isn't pleasant. At least if I don't know what will make me happy I can spend my life trying to find it. Even if I never do, there is some inherent optimism with searching. I currently know what I want and it is always out of my reach, so that is just disheartening.
That's a pretty hard one to answer unless you've experienced both. The only people I can think of in that category are those who eventually got what they wanted and were left feeling empty.
Never have. Even without some ultimate goal you can still have things that make you happy. Desires and goals are complex enough that if you can have anything you'll surely find something that can make you happy.
I don't think I could ever pick "Never Have". It's by far the more depressing option.
The operative word in the poll is 'never'. You'll never have what it is you want, in either case. So, in the case of "Never Have", striving to attain it is the epitome of futility. It's not a goal. It's a cruel insult.
With the "Never Know" option you'll never find that one thing that you want, but you'll at least have the chance to find a few things you do like while trying to figure out what it is you want.
The same could technically be said about the "Never Have" option, but regardless of what alternatives you find you'll never be able to truly enjoy them because none of them are the thing you truly want. You'll forever have the comparison of the thing you're striving for. If anything, finding alternatives will drive home the idea that you'll never have what it is that you want, making the whole endeavor even more depressing. With "Never Know" you'll have to deal with the idea that the alternatives you've found aren't the thing you're looking for, but since you don't actually know what that thing is you have only speculation on how much better it could be. This can make it easier to accept the alternative for what it is without the constant nagging feeling that it's not as good as the one you want.
That's why, to me anyway, striving to find the desired unknown is a far more optimistic goal than trying to attain the thing you can never have. It leads to more open-ended possibilities of discovery than aiming for a single-target goal.
The operative word in the poll is 'never'. You'll never have what it is you want, in either case. So, in the case of "Never Have", striving to attain it is the epitome of futility. It's not a goal. It's a cruel insult.
With the "Never Know" option you'll never find that one thing that you want, but you'll at least have the chance to find a few things you do like while trying to figure out what it is you want.
The same could technically be said about the "Never Have" option, but regardless of what alternatives you find you'll never be able to truly enjoy them because none of them are the thing you truly want. You'll forever have the comparison of the thing you're striving for. If anything, finding alternatives will drive home the idea that you'll never have what it is that you want, making the whole endeavor even more depressing. With "Never Know" you'll have to deal with the idea that the alternatives you've found aren't the thing you're looking for, but since you don't actually know what that thing is you have only speculation on how much better it could be. This can make it easier to accept the alternative for what it is without the constant nagging feeling that it's not as good as the one you want.
That's why, to me anyway, striving to find the desired unknown is a far more optimistic goal than trying to attain the thing you can never have. It leads to more open-ended possibilities of discovery than aiming for a single-target goal.
I'm going to go with it's worse to never know, because if I know what I want but can't have it, at least I have a goal and something to work towards. And in the process of working towards that goal, I can achieve other smaller, yet still cool, dreams along the way. Aim high and all that.