Poll: Teens sleeping together?

[SillyBear]

and how long they have been together.

Why would how long they have been together matter at all? What relevance would that have to anything?

From a concerned parents'/guardians' perspective, it may be easier to turn a blind eye to your child/ward being sexually active with a partner they have been with for years than one they met last week.

I'm a parent, and I understand that side, but since when did we care about "concerned parents"? They're the same group of people who try to boycott video games or ring up to complain about Katy Perry showing her upper chest on television.

I'll repeat the question: Why does it matter?

 

[Stasisesque]

and how long they have been together.

Why would how long they have been together matter at all? What relevance would that have to anything?

From a concerned parents'/guardians' perspective, it may be easier to turn a blind eye to your child/ward being sexually active with a partner they have been with for years than one they met last week.

I'm a parent, and I understand that side, but since when did we care about "concerned parents"? They're the same group of people who try to boycott video games or ring up to complain about Katy Perry showing her upper chest on television.

I'll repeat the question: Why does it matter?

Because in addition to protecting your child from disease, you also want to protect them against heartbreak?

When I say "concerned parent", I do not mean concerned for all children, just their own flesh and blood.

 

[SillyBear]

and how long they have been together.

Why would how long they have been together matter at all? What relevance would that have to anything?

From a concerned parents'/guardians' perspective, it may be easier to turn a blind eye to your child/ward being sexually active with a partner they have been with for years than one they met last week.

I'm a parent, and I understand that side, but since when did we care about "concerned parents"? They're the same group of people who try to boycott video games or ring up to complain about Katy Perry showing her upper chest on television.

I'll repeat the question: Why does it matter?

Because in addition to protecting your child from disease, you also want to protect them against heartbreak?

When I say "concerned parent", I do not mean concerned for all children, just their own flesh and blood.

Well then it's completely a non-issue. This thread is dealing more with societal perceptions of teen sex, and that's what I am talking about - how society views it. How an individual parent wants to protect their own child as an individual should have no bearings on society whatsoever.

Sorry for the misunderstanding.

 

[Aphex Demon]

If it's legal in your state, by all means shag like rabbits. For us in the UK it's 16. My parents wouldn't mind but if my sister was in then they may feel differently. I don't know, I've only had girls round to sleep while my parents have been away.

 

[Mad World]

I think that simply sleeping in the same bed should be fine (as long as temptation to have sex is able to be resisted). However, I am against sex before marriage (with or without protection).

 

[Still Life]

Snip.

The most important person you need to talk to is your partner. She needs to be ready for it and with sex comes responsibility. You get her pregnant and you abandon her, that earns you major 'douche' points and if I knew you in real life, I would fuck you up. You need to respect each other and look out for each other. If you follow those fundamental rules, I personally can't see a problem because I remember what it was like to be a teenager.

Be smart. Be honest. Be healthy

 

[Instinct Blues]

Theres absolutely nothing wrong with sex, if you use protection and you keep you're parteners to extremely low numbers because that is the best way to keep from spreading disease and all the bad things that come with sex.

Do I think teenagers so be having sex? In every case the answer I have is a resounding absolute no. I have a few reasons why and I'll explain them. First off as a teenager I don't believe they are fully prepared for the consequences of their actions because teens tend to only look at the good side of things and only truly realize the bad once its already happened so therefore its extremely hard to repair. Another reason is you aren't out of High School by that time and in this world you need at LEAST a High School diploma to be considered for any job that will only pay you with a half decent salary. Not to mention its quickly becoming that one needs at least a Bachelor's Degree in anything to be considered for a job that pays enough to support a family. No High School diploma means no college diploma which means you make the equivalent of dirt for the rest of your life because its extremely hard to get out of that hole once you're in it, especially if you have a kid you need to support.

I don't think you're parents should be supporting this in anyway unless they are both ready to deal with the consequences of your actions, which they condone, because if you did end up having a baby guess who would have to do most of the heavy lifting involved with that. Most likely them because I doubt you're prepared to support a child in any way because you are only a teenager without the monetary support necessary for a task like that.

TLR Sex isn't the most important thing in a relationship, especially one in the teenage years. You need to think of the consequences and is it really all worth just to get off for a bit.

 

[Instinct Blues]

I think once a person has sexual urges, they are old enough to have sex. If someone is educated enough to not make mistakes they'll be fine, if a kid is taught only to abstain, when they do choose to have sex, they'll be under-informed and unprepared.

So you're basically saying that middle-schoolers should be able to have sex because I'm pretty sure when every teenage boy starts to get sexual urges. Does it mean that they should be having sex? ABSOLUTELY NOT! To say otherwise is just retarded because they are in no way prepared for the responsibilities that come with sexual intercourse AT ALL. Of course educate them on the subject of safe sex, but don't start encouraging them to start boning immediately after the lesson is done.

 

[Outright Villainy]

As long as they're not stupid and use protection, and not sleep around[footnote]No, I'm not one of those moral guardians who think it's wrong, but it does carry much greater risk of spreading disease, and I don't really think teenagers are emotionally ready for it anyway. In your twenties or whatever it's fine.[/footnote], then it's fine. I don't see what sheltering them would achieve. They should be allowed make adult decisions on their own, as long as they can deal with any unexpected consequences. It's not like any teenager doesn't realise they can get pregnant.

 

[Android2137]

I consider a person ready for sex when they're ready to support themselves. Protection fails sometimes and if you're going to risk it, then you must take responsibility for what happens next. If it works, well you've taken your relationship to the next level. So how bad do you think it'll be for the both of you if you break up (and let's face it, chances of break-up at your age is very high)? If it doesn't work, congratulations, you who are still reliant on your own parents for your basic needs have now created your own little dependent and additional burden upon yourselves and your parents.

(And sleeping together, even without sex, can give people the wrong impression and the temptation will just make you want to actually do it. So please don't.)

 

[NinjaDeathSlap]

TBH I think slapping arbitrary age limits on stuff like this is, and always has been, stupid. The exact amount of years you have spent outside your mothers womb has little to no bearing on your level of mental and emotional maturity. I lost my virginity on my 16th birthday (so I was as young as was legally allowed in the UK) and it was great because I had chosen to do so with someone I was already in a serious relationship with, who I had been friends with a while before that, and as a result we were completely comfortable with each-other. On the other hand I've known people who have waited until they are in their early 20's, but then handled the matter so badly they now regret the experience.

tl;dr: Yes, if a teenager is capable of acting like an adult I see no reason why they should not be treated like one.

 

[redeemer09]

Fuck the rules, do what you want, Vivia la Mexico!!!!!!!!

ARRIBA ARRIBA ARRIBA

 

[SillyBear]

and how long they have been together.

Why would how long they have been together matter at all? What relevance would that have to anything?

From a concerned parents'/guardians' perspective, it may be easier to turn a blind eye to your child/ward being sexually active with a partner they have been with for years than one they met last week.

I'm a parent, and I understand that side, but since when did we care about "concerned parents"? They're the same group of people who try to boycott video games or ring up to complain about Katy Perry showing her upper chest on television.

I'll repeat the question: Why does it matter?

How odd that "concerned parent" is a dirty word in your vocabulary. All parents should be concerned about their kids.

*looks at your profile*

Teen parent were you?

Since you didn't bother to read what I've already said on the matter, I'll just post it here:

and how long they have been together.

Why would how long they have been together matter at all? What relevance would that have to anything?

From a concerned parents'/guardians' perspective, it may be easier to turn a blind eye to your child/ward being sexually active with a partner they have been with for years than one they met last week.

I'm a parent, and I understand that side, but since when did we care about "concerned parents"? They're the same group of people who try to boycott video games or ring up to complain about Katy Perry showing her upper chest on television.

I'll repeat the question: Why does it matter?

Because in addition to protecting your child from disease, you also want to protect them against heartbreak?

When I say "concerned parent", I do not mean concerned for all children, just their own flesh and blood.

Well then it's completely a non-issue. This thread is dealing more with societal perceptions of teen sex, and that's what I am talking about - how society views it. How an individual parent wants to protect their own child as an individual should have no bearings on society whatsoever.

Sorry for the misunderstanding.

edit: and no, I wasn't a teen parent. I'm 22. Like it is any of your concern at all.

 

[Tdc2182]

Does it really fucking matter?

If they are safe and aren't going to produce a baby or give each other STIs, what the fuck does it matter? What will be influenced negatively by this? What will change? How will it effect your life?

The answers are: No, No, Nothing, Nothing and It won't.

You know why this forum is considered superior to other forums? Because we like to think ourselves as one that thrives in having actual debates instead of the atypical 'throwing shit at each other from across the street', that you mostly see now on 4chan and site like that.

What you did right there was throw shit in the middle of a town hall meeting. Every other post I see of yours is you literally attacking someone elses opinion.

For fucks sake, chill out.

And, to think that a condom or birth control would remotely protect you from things like herpes is ridiculous.

OP: It really depends in my opinion.

I personally don't trust anyone with sex these days, because all of my friends seem to get way to lenient with safe sex. If I was a parent, I'd at least say no to it to keep them on their toes.

 

[Agayek]

Sleeping with her? Absolutely fine.

Sex? Debatable. If you have the means to handle the possible consequences (specifically, a child), then by all means go ahead and do so. If you lack these resources, I'd suggest you refrain from it. Accidents happen after all, and I'm betting you'd rather not ruin any chance at a profitable or successful career.

 

[SillyBear]

Does it really fucking matter?

If they are safe and aren't going to produce a baby or give each other STIs, what the fuck does it matter? What will be influenced negatively by this? What will change? How will it effect your life?

The answers are: No, No, Nothing, Nothing and It won't.

You know why this forum is considered superior to other forums? Because we like to think ourselves as one that thrives in having actual debates instead of the atypical 'throwing shit at each other from across the street', that you mostly see now on 4chan and site like that.

What you did right there was throw shit in the middle of a town hall meeting. Every other post I see of yours is you literally attacking someone elses opinion.

For fucks sake, chill out.

And, to think that a condom or birth control would remotely protect you from an STD is ridiculous.

OP: It really depends in my opinion.

I personally don't trust anyone with sex these days, because all of my friends seem to get way to lenient with safe sex. If I was a parent, I'd at least say no to it to keep them on their toes.

Eh, I think you're just like that teacher everyone has who always catches the one particular student doing something naughty when they are incredibly well behaved 99% of the time, and when they are well behaved they are never in the room.

 

[templargunman]

I think once a person has sexual urges, they are old enough to have sex. If someone is educated enough to not make mistakes they'll be fine, if a kid is taught only to abstain, when they do choose to have sex, they'll be under-informed and unprepared.

So you're basically saying that middle-schoolers should be able to have sex because I'm pretty sure when every teenage boy starts to get sexual urges. Does it mean that they should be having sex? ABSOLUTELY NOT! To say otherwise is just retarded because they are in no way prepared for the responsibilities that come with sexual intercourse AT ALL. Of course educate them on the subject of safe sex, but don't start encouraging them to start boning immediately after the lesson is done.

Well, I never said encourage them. If kids learn about safe sex right as they gain their urges they'll always understand the risks and responsibilities involved. People coddle children too much, I don't believe in taking away a kid's rights when if he knows enough he can make the right decision.

 

[Agayek]

And, to think that a condom or birth control would remotely protect you from an STD is ridiculous.

OP: It really depends in my opinion.

I personally don't trust anyone with sex these days, because all of my friends seem to get way to lenient with safe sex. If I was a parent, I'd at least say no to it to keep them on their toes.

I've just got to point out, condoms actually do protect from STDs. Birth control (as in pills and whatnot) do not, but condoms definitely do. They're not quite as effective against STDs as they are as birth control, but they are effective. If memory serves, it's something like a 75-85% success rate.

 

[Zac Smith]

I'm currently 19 and my girlfriend is a few months older and will 20 in October, when we first started going out we were both about 14 - 15, we only used to go each others houses just for the day. Then eventually when we were allowed to stay over for the night when we were both about 16 - 17 but both mine and her parents insisted we slept in separate beds (A blow up bed on the floor) One day while completely innocently pissing about (nothing sexual) we accidentally broke her bed (trying explaining that to her parents) By this time we were 17 going on 18 so she was allowed a double bed for us to use, a few months later I got a double bed as well. All the times we have been together, we use protection and she is on the pill, and both hers and my parents know this so are comfortable with us sleeping together.

In short, I think it's partly our ages and the fact that we have been together for about 4 1/2 years now constant, and all our friends call us the "Perfect Couple" and "Soul Mates" just because we've been together so long compared to other friends in relationships

 

[Avistew]

As far as I'm concerned, any sexual contact under 18 is borderline paedophilia. Sleeping together in the same bed is questionable and often sets a bad precedent.

Thinking it's too young is one thing, but pedophilia seems like an interesting accusation when they're the same age. Being attracted to people your age is normal and not a deviation, and pedophilia is a paraphilia.

Also, I know this word is used everywhere and all the time, but pedophilia means attraction to prepubescent children. That means before puberty, or in other words, if they're already teenagers, it's not pedophilia anymore. Hebephilia is for attraction to young pubescent children/teenagers (about 11 to 14) and ephebophilia for teenagers aged 15 to 19. (Teleiophilia for people older than that, if you're wondering. So, attraction to adults, which is the norm for adults).

It's actually relevant and not just a stupid linguistic correction and nitpick, because people are at different hormonal and physical stages in these periods, and therefore being attracted to them is different if it's a child or a near adult, the the whole reason behind these classifications (there is also a category for toddlers, but that's getting too far off-topic).

At any rate, in the case of adolescent pedophiles, the difference needs to be at least 5 years for it to qualify as pedophilia, so for instance someone aged 16 could have sex with someone aged 11 or older and it wouldn't be considered pedophilia because the age difference isn't big enough for the attraction to be considered "deviant". That is unrelated to the fact it might be illegal depending on the place where they live.

Now, the fact that it makes you uncomfortable in particular is a different issue altogether of course, and you're absolutely entitled to that. But just because, for instance, the idea of having sex with a 20 year old guy doesn't appeal to me because I think guys that age are too young (I'm 26) doesn't make it pedophilia.