Poll: The Vent Section!

[DeliveryGodNoah_v1legacy]

I have this incredibly pent up "creative" feeling, and every time I try to let it out I end up not knowing what to do.
I open a blank document, I type one sentence, and then I'm already lost. "Do I want this to be from the third person or the first person?"
"I haven't even decided what I want this to be about...I just had a really neat set-piece in mind."
"OH GOD I HAVEN'T COME UP WITH ANY NAMES YET"

I swear, sometimes this feeling is worse than my bouts of depression...I don't know how to explain it, so I hope people at least get it. I'm sure you will, ya'll are a pretty understanding bunch most of the time.

I managed to get one paragraph of literal gibberish out though.

 

[DudeistBelieve]

Well... I'm on the verge of getting my credit card debt paid off. So that's pretty badass.

And none to soon. I worked a dead end job until the place went bankrupt in November. The new job I work is paying the bills, easy enough, but not exactly fullfilling.

I have a problem at this point because I don't know what I want. I don't know what makes me happy. In a certain respect... I mean I'm okay, I'm not depressed, but I'm not happy. I don't feel alive. I just feel numb. I don't know what it is that thing that's missing from my life. That hobby or job that'll do it for me. I'm seeking out new things, I've taken up bowling of all things. I can't say it actually makes me happy, it's more something to just focus my energy on.

I just... want to feel like I'm alive damn it. Instead of just existing.

I always like this quote from the show Bojack Horseman:

The universe is a cruel, uncaring void. The key to being happy isn't a search for meaning. It's to just keep yourself busy with unimportant nonsense, and eventually, you'll be dead.

As for my vent. I got dumped by text on Sunday. Then yesterday pictures of her and her new boyfriend together came up on my newsfeed on facebook... Pictures from Saturday night. Hadn't had the chance to remove her from my friends, it was literally the first thing I saw when I logged in. But it's okay, I drank a lot last night.

Oh fuck, I love that show. I'm on a second binge watch of the second season. I've gotten into Dudeism/Taoism, so I just keep trying telling myself that the moment will pass. There will eventually be good moments again. But I really liked a bunch of quotes from that show, with the Bag Of Mulch (which is about not overthinking things) and even the final bit with the runner saying "It gets easier, but you have to do it everyday. That's the hard part. But it does get easier."

I've been in that exact scenario buddy. You're doing the right thing, just drink and block and try to move on. You will eventually not give a shit, you won't even be mad.

 

[Nuuu]

Kind of want to relax for a bit, but I've been having to write 4 essays in one week, as well as take 2 tests and a midterm exam in that same week. It's not that I can't handle it, it's just that I wish i didn't have to do it all in one week.
The worst is part not what I have to do this week, but that I have at least two big projects I have to start, maybe even finish after break, and I still don't fully understand what i'm doing with them.

College. Still better than High school.

I want to practice 3D animation, so I want to at least use Source Film Maker before I start the actual class at college in two years. I already have some 3D animation experience with pre-rigged models, but i'm just too lazy to start. I like to imagine that i'll devote some time over break, but I know i probably won't.

Lastly i'm just afraid of next year's 2D Game Development courses. I'm going for the art and design side of game development, and while I like to think i'd be competent, i have no real experience or talent in 2D art. I'd like to imagine that I can create a competent looking character given a little extra time, but that is just in my head.
Plus I kinda suck with colors. I'm not color blind at all, and I kinda understand color complements. I think i'm just really bad with properly making or utilizing color pallets.

 

[Darthpathfinder]

I work in retail so I must say...

If you are going to take something off a rack, for the love of god, put it back where it fucking belongs. Are you that fucking lazy? Get your head outta your ass. Also, you don't need to open every fucking box to see what it looks like, there is a reason why there is a picture on the front. And if you do open the box, have the decency to put the product back in the damn box!!! Christ.

Also, put your damn weights away when you are done with them in the gym. But also do it right!!!!!!!! I don't want to have to take off a god damn 45 just to get a 10 lb plate, fucking people.

Like people just astound me, in both a negative and positive way, but it seems like 80% of the time it is negative. You know who you are, give your heads a shake.

Yeah i always put stuff back when i am in the shop....Or if i knock something off i will always pick it up....It is hard enough on retail workers as it is with out people adding to it .

 

[maninahat]

I'm mad about the UK visa situation. What situation? The one that incrementally changes every fucking year to ensure you can never be quite used it. Does that sound like all of them? It is all of them - all visa processes suck.

I'm married to an Indian national, which means we need to get a marriage visa. I have to be earning over a certain amount each year (more than most people my age actually earn), provide a ton of private personal information to prove I've not been a sham relationship all these years, have to fill out reams of forms, and having to pay an extortionate upfront fee, regardless of whether I fuck up the application.

The worst part is that you can't just apply for a marriage visa either. What I am paying for is a temporary two year visa, which we will need to renew two more times before we can pass the five year restriction preventing us from immediately applying for the marriage visa. Yes, that's right, I essentially have to pay four times for one visa, pointlessly broken into four. All of this is so that I, as a British citizen, have the right to be with the woman I love. The only consolation is that I am not applying to India for an Indian marriage visa...shudder.

 

[axlryder]

The primaries and US politics in general.

Also I'm mad at myself for wasting so much of my day on the internet and watching various, pointless youtube videos that contribute nothing meaningful to my life. Unfortunately, the slough of learning a new skill or refining an old one just feels like it burns so much of my free time at this point that I can barely muster the energy to do it. I don't know if that mentality is a product of getting older or a product of sinking so much of my recent life into entertainment that it has shifted my brain's sense of priority.

Either way, that sense of satisfaction I used to get after working hard at something seems to have all but disappeared, which is a scary thought considering it was the one thing that used to keep me going.

 

[thewatergamer]

Whoof, I have been having alot of stress lately partly because in the middle of college I have to worry about finding a summer job which...in today's economy is almost impossible...I don't know what I'm going to do if I can't find a summer job, I'd rather not be forced to drop out of college after only 1 year in it and get a job, but that is unlikely, what is likely however is me getting stuck with a job that I just can't stand, I mean a job is a job but I can't handle a job that I hate over the summer, college is already bad enough

 

[Darthpathfinder]

I'm mad about the UK visa situation. What situation? The one that incrementally changes every fucking year to ensure you can never be quite used it. Does that sound like all of them? It is all of them - all visa processes suck.

I'm married to an Indian national, which means we need to get a marriage visa. I have to be earning over a certain amount each year (more than most people my age actually earn), provide a ton of private personal information to prove I'm not been a sham relationship all these years, have to fill out reams of forms, and having to pay an extortionate upfront fee, regardless of whether I fuck up the application.

The worst part is that you can't just apply for a marriage visa either. What I am paying for is a temporary two year visa, which we will need to renew two more times before we can pass the five year restriction preventing us from immediately applying for the marriage visa. Yes, that's right, I essentially have to pay four times for one visa, pointlessly broken into four. All of this is so that I, as a British citizen, have the right to be with the woman I love. The only consolation is that I am not applying to India for an Indian marriage visa...shudder.

Good lord that is messed up on so many levels.....

 

[feeback06]

The fact that Donald Trump is doing so well has moved me beyond anger, rage, and fury to just downright disbelief. I'm actually frightened now, something that I've never felt about any election before, if he wins. Could you IMAGINE the outrage in the U.S. if some other country demanded the U.S. pay for something they wanted to build in their country? And all the racist remarks, the sexism, and the fact that the Constitution just seems to not exist in his world is mind-boggling, and yet people are cheering him on at every turn. I just...it's like I don't recognize my country anymore.

I had a long talk with some of my friends last night about this and the only word that comes to my mind is embarrassing. "The Constitution seems not to exist in this world" really hits the nail on the head but the truly frightening aspect is that a majority of the voters don't seem to care.

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

Incoming vent: Steam selling the same games as GOG yet having some of them in less functional shape than the latter is absolutely ridiculous. Once again Steam's quality control is non-existent.

 

[Dragonlayer]

A once close friend, who trusted me to the extent that they shared some deeply sensitive issues with me and I did everything within my power to help them through it, even taking time off college at their behest, has spent the last few years completely ignoring me, bar the token "Oh I've been so busy lately!" email. Despite this, they come online on Steam on a daily basis, fail to contact me like they promise and never once asked if I had any life problems or issues of my own they could help with. Even back when we did still talk on a regular basis, it was effectively me talking at length to a brick wall that occasionally said "", as I always felt a responsibility to help take their mind off their rough patches (despite some seriously fucking miserable times for myself that I could have used a friend's shoulder to cry on).

I have this incredibly pent up "creative" feeling, and every time I try to let it out I end up not knowing what to do.
I open a blank document, I type one sentence, and then I'm already lost. "Do I want this to be from the third person or the first person?"
"I haven't even decided what I want this to be about...I just had a really neat set-piece in mind."
"OH GOD I HAVEN'T COME UP WITH ANY NAMES YET"

I swear, sometimes this feeling is worse than my bouts of depression...I don't know how to explain it, so I hope people at least get it. I'm sure you will, ya'll are a pretty understanding bunch most of the time.

I managed to get one paragraph of literal gibberish out though.

Ah man, I seriously empathize with you here, being unable to translate brilliant ideas into reality is infuriating. I love to write 40K and game fan-fiction pieces, and despite a few I've finished (and am proud of), I always seem to end up staring at an empty Google Docs page, willing everything in my head to come out. Eight hours later, and I've managed to write a single line of dialogue that I'm not even particularly happy with. I come up with new story concepts, then spend all day mentally nitpicking at them, often over the most trivial nonsense that no-one but me would care about in the slightest and it irritates the hell out of me.

 

[Rebel_Raven]

Every so often. Can't say I'm in the mood to right now, though.

 

[Parasondox]

A once close friend, who trusted me to the extent that they shared some deeply sensitive issues with me and I did everything within my power to help them through it, even taking time off college at their behest, has spent the last few years completely ignoring me, bar the token "Oh I've been so busy lately!" email. Despite this, they come online on Steam on a daily basis, fail to contact me like they promise and never once asked if I had any life problems or issues of my own they could help with. Even back when we did still talk on a regular basis, it was effectively me talking at length to a brick wall that occasionally said "", as I always felt a responsibility to help take their mind off their rough patches (despite some seriously fucking miserable times for myself that I could have used a friend's shoulder to cry on).

I believe social media, maybe internet activities have exposed a lot of lies people create and often just can't defend because they exposed themselves. The, "I'm so busy", has been used on me lately and it's utterly pathetic when you then see said "busy" people, post pics of parties and fun they are having (yay), seeing that they are very active on internet activities like forums, games and whatever argument/debate they are getting into and of course IM like WhatsApp where you message them saying hi and how are things, them being online, ignoring your message, then reading your message and then no response. Two blue ticks meant you read the message you dumbass.

You know what, saying all of that, often times you just have to let it go and let them do whatever. You may have tried everything to keep in touch. Messaged them, asked how they were doing, invite them to go out for coffee or a drink, but if their repeated excuse is "I'm so so busy" and yet it kinda shows otherwise in the things they put up, post and broadcast, then just stop. It's mentally not healthy. Trust me. Then again, you don't have to trust me at all. I know you are not looking for that person to drop everything to focus on. All you are looking for, and maybe nearly everyone would agree with this, is some sort of acknowledgement that, "hey. I am here too, I don't want to be forgotten".

Friendship, especially close ones, are meant to be a two way connect not a one way link that leaves one person feeling left out and shitty and the other having all focus on them. That goes for ALL relationships really.

Feeling invisible hurts no matter how many times you try to make yourself not be.

 

[Darthpathfinder]

Incoming vent: Steam selling the same games as GOG yet having some of them in less functional shape than the latter is absolutely ridiculous. Once again Steam's quality control is non-existent.

GOG work on the games they get do they not to make sure that they can work on newer systems....Do the people at steam do that or leave it to the game devs?

 

[Dragonlayer]

A once close friend, who trusted me to the extent that they shared some deeply sensitive issues with me and I did everything within my power to help them through it, even taking time off college at their behest, has spent the last few years completely ignoring me, bar the token "Oh I've been so busy lately!" email. Despite this, they come online on Steam on a daily basis, fail to contact me like they promise and never once asked if I had any life problems or issues of my own they could help with. Even back when we did still talk on a regular basis, it was effectively me talking at length to a brick wall that occasionally said "", as I always felt a responsibility to help take their mind off their rough patches (despite some seriously fucking miserable times for myself that I could have used a friend's shoulder to cry on).

I believe social media, maybe internet activities have exposed a lot of lies people create and often just can't defend because they exposed themselves. The, "I'm so busy", has been used on me lately and it's utterly pathetic when you then see said "busy" people, post pics of parties and fun they are having (yay), seeing that they are very active on internet activities like forums, games and whatever argument/debate they are getting into and of course IM like WhatsApp where you message them saying hi and how are things, them being online, ignoring your message, then reading your message and then no response. Two blue ticks meant you read the message you dumbass.

You know what, saying all of that, often times you just have to let it go and let them do whatever. You may have tried everything to keep in touch. Messaged them, asked how they were doing, invite them to go out for coffee or a drink, but if their repeated excuse is "I'm so so busy" and yet it kinda shows otherwise in the things they put up, post and broadcast, then just stop. It's mentally not healthy. Trust me. Then again, you don't have to trust me at all. I know you are not looking for that person to drop everything to focus on. All you are looking for, and maybe nearly everyone would agree with this, is some sort of acknowledgement that, "hey. I am here too, I don't want to be forgotten".

Friendship, especially close ones, are meant to be a two way connect not a one way link that leaves one person feeling left out and shitty and the other having all focus on them. That goes for ALL relationships really.

First off, I thank you for your sympathetic words, it means a lot to me that I can get this off my chest and actually have someone pay attention.

This whole situation really does boil down to something so simple, and seemingly a matter of common sense, that friendships are supposed to be matters of equality. It feels like I've poured so much time and effort into maintaining this relationship, and I've gotten so little out of it in return; that I should always be available to help them out, to listen to their problems, to entertain them, but nuts to me if I want to talk about something that interests me (good lord does the energy drain if I have to keep propping up a conversation purely for their sake). Moreover, I feel almost trapped by a lingering sense of loyalty to this person that makes me apprehensive about bringing these concerns up, so that I end getting quite bitter about the serious imbalance about this situation but ridiculously, feel too guilty to complain.

Feeling invisible hurts no matter how many times you try to make yourself not be.

This sums it up perfectly.

 

[Parasondox]

First off, I thank you for your sympathetic words, it means a lot to me that I can get this off my chest and actually have someone pay attention.

This whole situation really does boil down to something so simple, and seemingly a matter of common sense, that friendships are supposed to be matters of equality. It feels like I've poured so much time and effort into maintaining this relationship, and I've gotten so little out of it in return; that I should always be available to help them out, to listen to their problems, to entertain them, but nuts to me if I want to talk about something that interests me (good lord does the energy drain if I have to keep propping up a conversation purely for their sake). Moreover, I feel almost trapped by a lingering sense of loyalty to this person that makes me apprehensive about bringing these concerns up, so that I end getting quite bitter about the serious imbalance about this situation but ridiculously, feel too guilty to complain.

Feeling invisible hurts no matter how many times you try to make yourself not be.

This sums it up perfectly.

I wouldn't act like a dick towards a subject like this. I know the internet can be dark and some people are heartless but I don't want anyone to feel what I feel and felt in the past because it's shitty. Loneliness is a psychological killer and not many people realise. I'm touched that I could help in some way. Maybe your friend will finally see how you feel about them ignoring you or maybe not. If you are honest open to them, a heart to heart about how you feel, that should help build something back up again. If none of that works, then it may be time to let go of them no matter how hard it can be, it will have to be done. It's not easy, I know.

 

[Padwolf]

I want cuddles. I want chocolate. I want more ice cream and I want a pizza. All of those right now. Things are going wrong at work. I WANT TO SCRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM!!!!!

Well actually I want a new job to be honest, but at the same time I like where I am a lot, I just want to be working with animals. WHY ARE THERE NEVER ANY JOBS NEAR ME WITH ANIMALS?! Just makes me sad, I can't even do any volunteering

 

[Mikeybb]

Only as a biological function.

Trapped gasses can be bad for you and without frequent release, pressure can build and cause discomfort.

Vent frequently and liberally, that's my advice.

 

[Darthpathfinder]

I want cuddles. I want chocolate. I want more ice cream and I want a pizza. All of those right now. Things are going wrong at work. I WANT TO SCRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMM!!!!!

Well actually I want a new job to be honest, but at the same time I like where I am a lot, I just want to be working with animals. WHY ARE THERE NEVER ANY JOBS NEAR ME WITH ANIMALS?! Just makes me sad, I can't even do any volunteering

Screaming can help a lot.....As can venting...

 

[JaKandDaxter]

Let's just say I was criticized over a decision I made, without said person not knowing all the facts of what exactly occured. And why I saw the decision I made as the best most viable option considering the situation I found myself in.

I have no regrets what happened, and truly was blessed with a learning experience that was not looked down upon by a significant amount of people. I was even commended of how I handled the work situation with the help of some others. But someone did not feel the same and made it known, without giving me a chance to speak. So I was hurt by not being allowed to speak. And while I handled the criticism fairly well by maintaining a good Christ like composure. I guess I have to learn now how to be at peace with someone who doesn't give you an opportunity to speak. And who made some bad judgement calls based on false information.