Poll: UK Citizenship Quiz

[Bebus]

On a more serious note, that something like this passes for a British citizenship test is genuinely scary. You could train an animal to pass a test like this one.

Citizenship in Britain should not come from knowing obscure trivia about irrelevant subjects. It should come from an understanding of what the natives of the country you want to emigrate to actually desire; how they think. I work in an office building which has a company in whose business is to help immigrants pass this test. They sell books with the answers in, and the people you see going in there who can barely speak English and are clearly not here for the Fish and Chips honestly make me worry about what is going on with my country.

A better method of testing would be one on one interviews with trained immigration officers. Questions would be asked, questions with no right answer such as "you hear a scream coming from your neighbour's flat, what do you do", and the reasoning behind the answer should count more than the answer itself. This might take longer but with something as important as this, it is worth it.

 

[Wargamer]

Lets submit some correct questions. Anyone failing this test should be shot, then deported.

1) Why is it important for a small island nation with limited space and finite resources impose strict immigration and border control laws?
A) It is not - we should welcome all who want to be here!
B) Because we already have too many people, too few houses and too few jobs, and thus by way of simple COMMON SENSE we must seek to instigate population control by the least draconian and most liberty-respecting method possible - to whit, closing borders to all save those whose entry significantly benefits the whole.

2) What is more important; having respect for the communities and individuals that are already present and established within Britain and adjusting your behaviour in order to BE respectful toward them (ie: adopting a "do unto others" mentality), or being a self-centred twat?
A) Being a twat.
B) Do unto others.

3) Is a Hoody acceptable attire in any situation where it is not freezing cold and/or pissing it down?
A) Yes.
B) No.

4) The police are here...
A) To protect us.
B) To serve the politicial interests of the government.

5) Murdering a politician is...
A) A crime.
B) To be encouraged.


If you answer A to any of these questions, please enter below what size coffin you would like, and where we should send your corpse.

 

[F'Angus]

9 out of 24 and I'm a British Citizen..hell of a hard quiz.

 

[SFR]

23. How might you stop young people playing tricks on you at Halloween?

What the fuck is this shit? The correct answer is apparently giving them chocolate or sweats. Yeah, that's what people do on Halloween, give kids treats and such, but they shouldn't be fucking playing tricks on you to begin with. I don't care if that's part of the little jingle "Trick or treat!", I'd call the fucking cops. Oh yeah, and how is this a question for gaining citizenship?

Also, that can't be right... it says woman are on average payed 20 percent less than men. Holy crap.

 

[BeanDelphiki]

Halloween is noticeable over here, you'll see a few groups of children going round the streets as long as you're not in the middle of nowhere. But they'll usually stick to houses of people they know. Not sure how big it is over in Canada in comparison.

It's definitely the worst question. If someone's standing outside your door demanding something from you and won't leave, then police doesn't seem like such a bad option. It's a really rude tradition when you think about it.

Interesting, thanks.

OT, but for the sake of comparison:

Spoiler

In Canada, the few people who don't celebrate it generally leave as many lights off around the front of the house as they can to indicate "not here, please," and may just go out for the night. Otherwise, trick-or-treating can start early in the day for very little ones (the trend where I live right now is for parents to bring them to the shopping mall as a "safe" place, and stores give out candy during the day), and go very late for older children. Many people decorate the outside of their house at least a bit (and some a LOT), and there's always a few people who run their own "haunted house" out of their home. Adults may throw parties or go to various events - one year I worked as an actor at Project X, which was then a two-story paid haunted house run out of old army barracks. There was a top-floor ("less scary" stuff) matinee version for kids (with their parents), and the two-floor version that started at 5 or 6 was 13+ or something like that, and ran until 3 in the morning.

As for treating. The general idea is to cover as much ground as you can - every house for blocks and blocks, so kids will be ringing your bell continuously for hours. Generally, people don't "trick," (unless they're complete jerks), but when I was a kid, there was the occasional person who invited us to "trick" them in order to get candy - once a friend of mine and I completely wrapped a man up like a mummy in the rolls and rolls of toilet paper we had on hand.

I guess it is rude...? But I wouldn't usually think of it that way. I would really only consider people rude if they try to grab more than their fair share of candy, and it is also really rude to persist (knock more than once or twice, really) at a home where no one responds. (If you have a reason to think that someone is there giving out treats - decorations, lights on - then not leaving might be okay, as the person giving out candy and manning the door might have run off and will be back. If that's not the case though, you should assume people don't celebrate it and leave without fuss.) Otherwise, it's not considered rude for that one night. I guess everyone understands it as a tradition, so the usual rules of behaviour don't apply.

 

[ReservoirAngel]

3) Is a Hoody acceptable attire in any situation where it is not freezing cold and/or pissing it down?
A) Yes.
B) No.

I really don't get the hatred for hoodies. As in, the item of clothing. It just baffles me this negative reaction have to what is, essentially, just a jumper with a hood stitched onto it. The clothing isn't what you need to be opposed to, it's the violent fuckhead wearing it you need to worry about.

I mean fuck, I wear hoodies and I literally have, on numerous occasions, helped people across the fucking street. Both grandmas and little children.

 

[Nuke_em_05]

7/24...
Would probably know better if I actually lived there. Got 48/50 on the U.S. test.

 

[Palindromemordnilap_v1legacy]

Only 11 out of 24. Damn, and I'm actually British. I'd hate to be actually applying for British citizenship

 

[willsham45]

9 out of 24, fail. I think those questions were wrong they should be things Do you like tea or can you make tea, If you live in Yorkshire who is your mural enemy, and maybe another for Glasgow. What is the correct thing to have in a pasties, How do you spell Colour and so on.

 

[liquidsolid]

4/24. I'm an American and that test is not easy. Lots of arbitrary questions about how long the census is kept secret. What does that matter? I was hoping I would be able to pass with my knowledge of British History and a basic understanding of how the government works. Boy was I wrong...

 

[Hucket]

8/24...I'm Canadian, so I guess that's like failing a test on your parents' personal history and trival past.

Why would I have to know how many young people are in the UK? or when women got the right to divorce? Would not knowing that make me any less of a citizen? I don't even know those stats about my home country :S

 

[Karlaxx]

Failed with a 50% as a non-citizen. Eh, could have been worse.

 

[NinjaCatStudios]

The questions are rubbish trivia, I got 9/24 and I am scottish.
They should be more about soceity and the culture here.

Has someone made the questions deliberately rubbish to lower the amount of immigration?

 

[Darks63]

8 out of 24 im def not gonna be a tommy anytime soon.

 

[EightGaugeHippo]

Failed and from UK

"You scored 8 out of a possible 24"

 

[MGlBlaze]

I'm a UK citizen and I failed, though these questions seem largely arbitrary, I feel sorry for anyone having to wade through this bullshit to get citizenship.

I have to agree. Now, some political things I don't have an excuse for I suppose beyond not caring about politics, but why should I care when the first census was taken, or why a recruitment center was set up somewhere? Or anyone, for that matter?

 

[Roxas1359]

I got 10 out of 24, which was much better than I thought I would have done. Some of the questions I remember learning there answers in AP World History.

 

[OutsiderEX]

This is a ridiculous test; there are some elements there that are necessary; knowledge about hospitals and schools, for example, but some of the questions are just ridiculous. I failed and I'm fairly knowledgeable about politics in this country (got an high A in A-level politics) and a history student; it's the random questions that tripped me up.

Playing Devil's Advocate here, the test is probably designed to be artificially difficult due to the trend of discouraging immigration and is probably run under the assumption that if one really wants to become a citizen, the least they could do is work on memorising this sort of information, even if it is useless as it shows they are willing to put the effort in. That seems to be the sort of mindset that afflicts the last few Ministries for Education, etc.

Pity the poor sod who has to take this and someone slap the idiots who thought up some of these questions if they really believed it's a test of Citizenship.

 

[JokerboyJordan]

I got 6/24... and I'm a UK born and bred

 

[The Cap]

bugger i failed.

at least this means a lot of immigrants that dont really want to come here (ie study and revise and put the effort in like a biacth) wont get in

our country is overpopulated enough as it is

especially now withhalf on europe going down the toilet, although they wont have to take this test id imagine