Poll: What is pie?

[Dwarfman]

Snip

There are many different kinds of pies both Savoury and Sweet; Pastry and Dish. To say one pie is a good manly pie and the other is a fruity womanly pie is both meaningless and retarded. As a qualified chef who has worked in the hospitality industry for the better part of 13 years, this is my professional opinion of your poll.

PS If you are trying to visually sell the concept that a meat pie is better than an apple pie please use a real pie and not some frozen job courtesy Mrs Mac or 4 and Twenty caper. Steak and Kidney (diced big so I can see the steak and kidney) cooked up with mirepoix (That's a culinary term for onion, celery, leek and carrot roughly diced) in stout and a beef stock made with beef bones simmered and skimmed for 8 hours. Forty minutes in the oven in a blind baked pie case with the flakiest muther fucking puff pastry as the top. Do not serve with ketchup. Ketchup is for the weak. IF it's a good flavoursome pie the sauce is already inside the pie. All you have to do is take a bite. Once you have done this then you can come back and talk to me about manly/good pies.

 

[Dwarfman]

Cheesecake. Cheesecake is a pie.

Sorry kiddo Cheesecake is cake. Otherwise we chefs would call is Cheese-pie

 

[Dwarfman]

This discussion is fruitless, there is simply no meat to it.

Also, (for comedic effect please read in thick german accent)
You english spiekerz and your puny problemz, we in ze germany have not such problemz.
We have designated wordz that accurately distinguish "meat pie" and "fruit pie".
Zus, german is klearly ze superior language, and we are ze more tolerant people for we welcome all pies equally to make our meals more delicious.

You're such a punny person.

Growing up in Melton Mowbray, I can tell you that there is one true pie:

Spoiler: Bask in its glory

Dear god sir what is that? It's the pork pie from hell! Looks tasty though.

 

[deathninja]

Dear god sir what is that? It's the pork pie from hell! Looks tasty though.

Walkers, they handmake them so they look a bit quirky. Bloody lovely though.

 

[direkiller]

Cheesecake. Cheesecake is a pie.

Sorry kiddo Cheesecake is cake. Otherwise we chefs would call is Cheese-pie

just like head cheese is a cheese?

it depends on the recipe. If it's a thin crust it's a pie(basically made with a pie base). If it's a thicker base(sponge cake for example) it's a cake.



OT: Fruit and sugar pies are clearly superior

 

[cookyt]

If it's round and has a crust and filling, it is a pie. This definition allows pizza to be counted. You can call it blasphemous, but I'll call it delicious. And now I'm hungry...

 

[Dwarfman]

just like head cheese is a cheese?

No. That would imply smegma is a dairy product which it clearly isn't.

 

[Lunar Templar]

aww

i thought this was gonna be about pizza .....

 

[smithy_2045]

A pie is naturally assumed to be you basic meat pie. If it's not your basic meat pie, you specify what it is.

Silly Americans and their culinary ignorance.

 

[Dwarfman]

If it's round and has a crust and filling, it is a pie. This definition allows pizza to be counted. You can call it blasphemous, but I'll call it delicious. And now I'm hungry...

A pie can be any shape, does not require a crust and can be cooked in a deep dish without a base. It does require a covering however that covering does not need to be pastry and can be potato or cheese - and before you say it the cheese for any decent pizza unless it's a hard cheese crumbled for garnish like feta goes underneath the toppings not on top. The only kind of pizza that can qualify as a pie are the deep dish pizza pies found in chicago as seen in Anthony Bourdain's 'No Reservations'

 

[Worgen]

Obviously pie is Pinkie as in Pinkie Pie.

*scampers away into the internet*

 

[direkiller]

just like head cheese is a cheese?

No. That would imply smegma is a dairy product which it clearly isn't.

I think your confusing head cheese(a food name) with slang.

LOL

 

[gim73]

Uh, yeah, the pi joke only works if it's said, not written.

fruit pie is the best

meat pies are meh...

cake is not pie

meat cake is lasagna, which is why any idiot who makes lasagna without any meat is simply making some other unnamed dish and calling it something it's not.

 

[Dwarfman]

just like head cheese is a cheese?

No. That would imply smegma is a dairy product which it clearly isn't.

I think your confusing head cheese(a food name) with slang.

LOL

If you're refering to that strange meat jelly substance that Europeans sometimes class as food then no. Not a very appetising product in my book.

Edit - In either case though they still aren't a dairy product.

 

[Dwarfman]

Dear god sir what is that? It's the pork pie from hell! Looks tasty though.

Walkers, they handmake them so they look a bit quirky. Bloody lovely though.

My friend you can tell that not only are they handmade but they are made with love and care. The way all good food should be.

 

[direkiller]

just like head cheese is a cheese?

No. That would imply smegma is a dairy product which it clearly isn't.

I think your confusing head cheese(a food name) with slang.

LOL

If you're refering to that strange meat jelly substance that Europeans sometimes class as food then no. Not a very appetising product in my book.

Edit - In either case though they still aren't a dairy product.

yes I am


the problem is using the same logic as cheesecake being a cake it is in fact a cheese.

See the problem.

 

[Dwarfman]

just like head cheese is a cheese?

No. That would imply smegma is a dairy product which it clearly isn't.

I think your confusing head cheese(a food name) with slang.

LOL

If you're refering to that strange meat jelly substance that Europeans sometimes class as food then no. Not a very appetising product in my book.

Edit - In either case though they still aren't a dairy product.

yes I am


the problem is using the same logic as cheesecake being a cake it is in fact a cheese.

See the problem.

There is no problem other than it is late and I am still in kitchen mode. To prevent me from being permenately banned from this site I'll sign off now and just ignore you.

 

[RJ 17]

Well that OP wasn't presented with any sort of bias or implications.

Anyways, I like going with Jim Gaffigan's definition:
"Pie is like liquid cake, the biggest difference is that if you put candles on a cake, it's someone's birthday. If you put candles on a pie, someone's drunk in the kitchen again."

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

Did you say pi-

3.14159...Etc etc, ad infinitum.

... fuck, ninjaed. Oh well.

....

OT: Fruit Pies, obviously. Or possibly pecan pie. Meat Pies are "pot pies" - a whole other thing. Just pie is clearly a desert that comes in a pie crust.

Actually, there it is, isn't it? A pie is anything in a pie crust.

I still voted fruit, though.

 

[geK0]

3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510552097494459230781640628620899862803482532823208265132823

I think I made a few mistakes in there..it's been a while