Poll: Why do you hate elves?
- Thread starter EmperorSubcutaneous
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Ugh, it's their unreasonable demands and blatant hypocrisy that gets to me. They act all offended because I try to sell them one wooden cup, and then they turn around and try to sell me a ton of wooden weapons, armour and cages! Even worse, they then forbid me from cutting down too many trees for wood I sorely need despite that I know for a fact they have entire armies of people wielding nothing but wooden weaponry. Needless to say, the Elves involved and the entire forest in a mile-wide radius around my home tend to have unfortunate magma-related accidents whenever this occurs.
Fully drownable marketplace, anyone? Also use water god damn it, think of the caged animals!Lunncal said:
OT: Their depictions in fiction may be manifold, but they still all share the common trait of being quite the nuisance whenever they come across your path.
because despite their magic, awesome bow skills, long lives they still lose against humans in wars
Well spoken brother! Together we shall drive them out of Skyrim and once again have our homeland as our own!TizzytheTormentor said:
-Also Nord
Captcha: run throu. Ironic. It's what I'd like to do to all but maybe four elves in Skyrim.
I know it wasn't a reply to me but since i share pretty much the same sentement:EmperorSubcutaneous said:
Yes
orcs too...
and unicorns and fairies and goblins and trolls
and don't even get me started on dragons
((Its probably why i like the fantasy world of Diablo. None of that lame ass overused stuff[well, unless you count the undead, but i don't mind them as much], they had their own beasts, (and demons, demons are pretty neat). That cliche fantasy stuff? It's just so... childish.))
Because no one has done elves right since Terry Pratchett in Lords and Ladies and The Wee Free Men. Elves are evil, vicious, cunning, and cruel. Anything so "superior" cannot and will not treat lesser creatures with compassion. They will play with them, manipulate them, and possibly eat them. All other elves are fake.
It's why I rather enjoy the idea of Drow. They're the only ones who hate elves as much as I do.
I favor fantasy settings that either don't have elves, or the elves are rank bastards as is proper (Warhammer and 40K, Guild Wars 2, etc.).
And the elves in the Lord of the Rings didn't get one-tenth the kicking around they needed.
It's why I rather enjoy the idea of Drow. They're the only ones who hate elves as much as I do.
I favor fantasy settings that either don't have elves, or the elves are rank bastards as is proper (Warhammer and 40K, Guild Wars 2, etc.).
And the elves in the Lord of the Rings didn't get one-tenth the kicking around they needed.
I always see Elves as A Annoying "I'm better than you because I just am" attitude they all seem to have and mostly because Dwarf Fortress they killed my best men...
I'm sorry Batman oh god I'm so sorry for sending you out for fish...*Sobs*
ELVEN BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
I'm sorry Batman oh god I'm so sorry for sending you out for fish...*Sobs*
ELVEN BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
See, although dwarves are just as prevalent as elves, they're usually bundled up with elves or left out entirely. When dwarves are included, they're often at the sidelines while the elves take center-stage. Thus why it is alright to complain about the prevalence of elves but not dwarves.
That being said, I wish people could use those flabby pink thing installed behind their eyes to actually think of something more original than elves, dwarves, goblins, and anthropomorphic animals. I'm already boasting one original race idea.
That being said, I wish people could use those flabby pink thing installed behind their eyes to actually think of something more original than elves, dwarves, goblins, and anthropomorphic animals. I'm already boasting one original race idea.
Other: because they're usually so very one dimensional. (thanks for reminding me of the word I was looking for CountChopula)
Example: in most fantasy worlds they are generally smarter than all other races and have longer life spans. So it makes sense they'll sometimes act a bit stuck up towards other races.
What doesn't make sense however, is when every last one of them is a 300 year old genious wizard egomaniac.
Compare it to a real life example: it makes sense that slightly more people than average wear berets in France. Since it is sort of a French thing. But not every last Frenchman wears a beret every single day everywhere! that's just retarded.
I have the same problem with most "classic" fantasy races though. (perpetually drunk hardass dwarves anyone?) Human may seem like the most boring race to pick but at least they actually have varying personalities.
Example: in most fantasy worlds they are generally smarter than all other races and have longer life spans. So it makes sense they'll sometimes act a bit stuck up towards other races.
What doesn't make sense however, is when every last one of them is a 300 year old genious wizard egomaniac.
Compare it to a real life example: it makes sense that slightly more people than average wear berets in France. Since it is sort of a French thing. But not every last Frenchman wears a beret every single day everywhere! that's just retarded.
I have the same problem with most "classic" fantasy races though. (perpetually drunk hardass dwarves anyone?) Human may seem like the most boring race to pick but at least they actually have varying personalities.
Because I find the overuse of them to be annoying and not at all creative. They seem to be in damn near everything that's labeled under "fantasy" these days. Why can't people create their own races anymore?
Plus they're almost always environmentalist douchebags, which are one of the worst kinds of people.
Plus they're almost always environmentalist douchebags, which are one of the worst kinds of people.
This one thinks the Mer paint themselves as morally superior to Men when they are invaders to the land of the Beasts as well, all should be more like Khajiit... the only thing to do in the desert is walk, not draw lines and kill anyone who crosses them. Khajiit let you take the land you needed from the Beasts, but then you try to give Khajiit your thjizzrini... your foolish concepts or "rules", as you say. All Mer want to be the Mane to the Khajiit and give rules, all Men want to grow glorious manes like the Khajiit. In short, all want to be like Khajiit except for friend-race Argonians.TizzytheTormentor said:
Also, this Khajiit is confused by you decendants of the Nede using "Milk-drinker" as an insult... Khajiit LOVE milk, it is no Moon Sugar but you cant drink Moon Sugar.
- Khajiit
I don't really hate elves.
I hate certain kinds of elves, like TES High Elves because they are mostly pompous assholes, or Night Elves because they are so incredibly pacifist, yet will wage a jihad if they see any of their trees cut down.
LOTR elves (all of them) are my favorite. Good balance of "we're really smart and live a REALLY long time", humility, and nature-ness. The woodland elves that Legolas comes from are kind of fanatical when it comes to non-elf relations, but they're not that bad.
I hate certain kinds of elves, like TES High Elves because they are mostly pompous assholes, or Night Elves because they are so incredibly pacifist, yet will wage a jihad if they see any of their trees cut down.
LOTR elves (all of them) are my favorite. Good balance of "we're really smart and live a REALLY long time", humility, and nature-ness. The woodland elves that Legolas comes from are kind of fanatical when it comes to non-elf relations, but they're not that bad.
I have an aversion to elves because I was brought up on old English fairy takes and Brothers Grimm books.
Fairies and Elves are not something you want to be meeting on a dark night. I regard them with distrust preferably from very far away behind some sort of barricade.
Fairies and Elves are not something you want to be meeting on a dark night. I regard them with distrust preferably from very far away behind some sort of barricade.
Well, I enjoy the Elves in The Witcher universe. They just seem to carry that feeling of an oppressed people with no real hope, yet they continue fighting anyway they can to the last man. More typical Elves I'm neither here nor there with really. Some can be pretty cool (Faendal in Skyrim was a good companion. R.I.P.) but ultimately, a lot of them are very mediocre in feeling I think.
I have read only a few posts but not all of them, so much of what I say may have been ninja'd by a previous comment. TL;DR at the bottom.
I hate elves primarily because they are the Mary Sues of Tolkien-esque fantasy. In the strictly Tolkien sense, they are the strongest, fastest, smartest, prettiest, and wisest race above all beyond competition. They are great warriors, deep and insightful masters of poetry and philosophy, master craftsmen, and are all "One with the Earth" in that they know almost all of nature and history's secrets. Oh, and they have fantastically long life spans, if not immortal in some cases. And almost always white.
They are the ideal "Sue" character for white supremacists. I hate Mary Sues and I hate white supremacists. Therefore, I hate elves.
I also hate them for being so god damn prevalent; there is always some kind of elf or elf-like race in EVERY fantasy (Or heck, even in some Sci-fi) themed universes.
Take the whole race-supremacy-thing and the fact that they are over-used and you have a god damned Mary Sue race for every god damned IP considered "fantasy".
For weeaboos, the elves are asian and nearly perfect.
For the uncreative, they are practically the same except that they may be a slightly different color (*COUGHCOUGH"darkelves"COUGHCOUGH*).
For uncreative Sci-Fi writers, they are just elves in space re-labeled as "Aliens".
While I hated almost everything else about Dragon Age, the one thing I did like was how they portrayed elves as disparate and impoverished - not immortal, not the uber-powerful noble warrior/poet/scholar/rogue/archer nerd wish-fulfillment trope they are usually cast as; they are only the Master Race in their own heads and through their own retrospect of their past. Unfortunately, Dragon Age sucked balls IMHO.
Part of it is a deep personal hate for flawless characters. No, being 'Incredibly haughty and elitist to the point of working against them" is NOT a real flaw. Not when it is kept in context of actually being as uber-skilled/strong/smart as is said about them. It's bad writing in general and is indicative of pathetic and desperate wish-fulfillment. The flaws of a character are sometimes the best part of the character if written and implemented properly, so the flawless elf trope annoys me, and the prevalence of every downtrodden fantasy writer amplifies that until I start to get sick.
Of course, it should be no surprise that my interest in character flaw is why my personal favorite in terms of original Tolkien races are the Orcs. Ugly, misshapen, and with varying intelligence, when one of them gets a personality through character development they are almost always more interesting as characters.
TL;DR: I hate flawless "Mary Sues" and their obscene prevalence and over-use in the fantasy genre. I think character flaw is what makes characters interesting and thus why I dislike most elf characters (More like deep and personal hate in a RAAAAGE-rant).
All of this was just to explain my opinion. Why I certainly think my opinions have at least a kernel of truth to them, my intention was not to present them as such.
I hate elves primarily because they are the Mary Sues of Tolkien-esque fantasy. In the strictly Tolkien sense, they are the strongest, fastest, smartest, prettiest, and wisest race above all beyond competition. They are great warriors, deep and insightful masters of poetry and philosophy, master craftsmen, and are all "One with the Earth" in that they know almost all of nature and history's secrets. Oh, and they have fantastically long life spans, if not immortal in some cases. And almost always white.
They are the ideal "Sue" character for white supremacists. I hate Mary Sues and I hate white supremacists. Therefore, I hate elves.
I also hate them for being so god damn prevalent; there is always some kind of elf or elf-like race in EVERY fantasy (Or heck, even in some Sci-fi) themed universes.
Take the whole race-supremacy-thing and the fact that they are over-used and you have a god damned Mary Sue race for every god damned IP considered "fantasy".
For weeaboos, the elves are asian and nearly perfect.
For the uncreative, they are practically the same except that they may be a slightly different color (*COUGHCOUGH"darkelves"COUGHCOUGH*).
For uncreative Sci-Fi writers, they are just elves in space re-labeled as "Aliens".
While I hated almost everything else about Dragon Age, the one thing I did like was how they portrayed elves as disparate and impoverished - not immortal, not the uber-powerful noble warrior/poet/scholar/rogue/archer nerd wish-fulfillment trope they are usually cast as; they are only the Master Race in their own heads and through their own retrospect of their past. Unfortunately, Dragon Age sucked balls IMHO.
Part of it is a deep personal hate for flawless characters. No, being 'Incredibly haughty and elitist to the point of working against them" is NOT a real flaw. Not when it is kept in context of actually being as uber-skilled/strong/smart as is said about them. It's bad writing in general and is indicative of pathetic and desperate wish-fulfillment. The flaws of a character are sometimes the best part of the character if written and implemented properly, so the flawless elf trope annoys me, and the prevalence of every downtrodden fantasy writer amplifies that until I start to get sick.
Of course, it should be no surprise that my interest in character flaw is why my personal favorite in terms of original Tolkien races are the Orcs. Ugly, misshapen, and with varying intelligence, when one of them gets a personality through character development they are almost always more interesting as characters.
TL;DR: I hate flawless "Mary Sues" and their obscene prevalence and over-use in the fantasy genre. I think character flaw is what makes characters interesting and thus why I dislike most elf characters (More like deep and personal hate in a RAAAAGE-rant).
All of this was just to explain my opinion. Why I certainly think my opinions have at least a kernel of truth to them, my intention was not to present them as such.
Only elves I hate are the badly written ones.
Dwarves on the other hand I find incredibly overrated.
In videogames I love the Dunmer from Morrowind for being racist and jerks just like people in real life.
Dwarves on the other hand I find incredibly overrated.
In videogames I love the Dunmer from Morrowind for being racist and jerks just like people in real life.
Mainly, they're always so arrogant and "perfect". Oh, the ELVES couldn't have caused the problem! Clearly it was the humans or dwarves who messed up! Let's blame everyone BUT the elves!
Then when things go wrong, instead of trying to fix it they just run off, or seal themselves in a time bubble, or refuse to even see that something could possibly hurt them.
Then when things go wrong, instead of trying to fix it they just run off, or seal themselves in a time bubble, or refuse to even see that something could possibly hurt them.
