As a trans woman myself, I've found this thread quite interesting, and I've pleased to see that the escapist community is a forward thinking and accepting one. That having been said, there are a few points I'd like to make for those of you who don't seem to understand.
Firstly transwomen did not use to be men. I have never been a man, I will accept that I was a boy for a period of my life, but never a man. Manhood comes from the lessons you learn during childhood, and I never learn those lessons, as I knew I was female from a very young age. I have no experience of being a man, nor really of being a boy. The only way I know life, is as a transsexual, and as a woman.
Secondly people don't to understand that gender and sex are not the same thing... A few people have said that you cannot change your gender, and that you could never see a transperson as the gender that live as. This is worng, and stems from a lack of understanding of what gender is. Gender cannot be measured, or tested for, it is nothing more than a social construct that we created... genders not tangible, so the only effective way to measure it is by asking people what they feel themselves to be. I do agree that gender cannot be changed, but for transsexuals there is no need to change it, my gender is (And always has been) female, it never changed.
Sex on the other hand is to do with you biological body, and I would at least understand you saying that you cannot change your sex (I don't agree with that, but I can understand why someone would think it) as technically I will never be able to change my chromosomes. However I feel that one can fix their physical body, then that should be enough. Plenty of ciswomen are born with out wombs, or with intersex conditions... are they not women in your opinion? What if a woman has to have a mastectomy due to an illness, is she not a woman now? Ciswomen are accepted as women, even if their bodies as far from what is consider normal as transwomens are. What is it exactly that you feel makes a woman a woman?
This is why I prefer the term transsexual to transgender. Trans comes from the latin "to move across", and to say "to move across gender" makes no sense to me, whereas "to move across sex" does, I can (And am) changing my physical body, and in my opinion, that is all I need to do.
Thirdly, there's been a lot of talk about the results of surgery, the general opinion seems to be that they are quite poor. This is not entirely true (At least not for transwomen, I know that transmen do have much more varied results, and I can imagine how it must be for them - My heart goes out to you guys) a lot of the photos you find online are very poor, but this comes down to where you have your surgery done, who does it, and what technique they use... sadly this is all influenced by how much you can afford to spend, and many people do take a budget route here.
Obviously there is a bit of luck involved, but if you can do your research, and you have cash to blow, then you can expect very good results. Most of the transwomens vagina's that I have seen in real life (I've never dated a transwomen, but I have been show a few results by my close friends) are very good indeed, and look just like ciswomen's. My partner has also seen quite a few photos of results, and has commented that they "Look my normal than mine"
It is true that many transwomen cannot orgasm in quite the same way as ciswomen, though again with a good surgeon it is possible (Though rare), transwomen can also generally not produce their own lubrication (Though again, it can happen, but it's very rare) however plenty of ciswomen suffer from dryness as well, so I don't really think it's a problem, or that it makes us less normal.
Right, now for the poll, there wasn't an option for me so I'll just answer here, I'm a mtf, and I would date another mtf. I would never consider dating a ftm, because I would never want to date a man, and while I would date a mtf sexual contact would be a big no until they'd had their surgery, this might seem an odd thing to say coming someone who is trans themselves, but I simply could not stand the penis (Regardless of whether it's on a cisman, transman, or transwomen) I already got one in my life that I hate and need to be rid of, I do not need a second!
I hope people might have gained something from this... but if you didn't so what! For me if people aren't okay with it, then I decide that they're probably not worth knowing anyway. No offence meant to anyway by this, you're all entitled to your own opinions of course, however for me, if people can't see me for who I am, I don't want to waste my time getting to know them, as I know that they'll never truly know me.
