Post some godawful video game character designs

Dalisclock

Making lemons combustible again
Legacy
Escapist +
Feb 9, 2008
11,286
7,082
118
A Barrel In the Marketplace
Country
Eagleland
Gender
Male
Nope, no one has mentioned her. I suppose you could say she

(•_•)
( •_•)>⌐■-■
(⌐■_■)

slipped under the radar, until now.

The moment I unlock the XOF suit for her she wears it for the rest of the game because then it looks like she's actually a professional and not a stripper with an unhealthy attachment to Snake.

Also the least....fanservicey skin she has. Like there's a gold, silver and blood skin and those are all just as immersion breaking for different reasons.

I like the idea of Quiet. I'm annoyed the execution is basically wank material with a sniper rifle and Kojima isn't even trying to hide it. Especially when characters like Eva and the Boss exist. Even Paz, who for some reason is mostly naked in her boss fight from Peace Walker, is a character in her own right and you can handwave that she's in an Evangelion style fluid cockpit during the fight with ZEKE at the end of PW(the fact you only see her for a few seconds in comic book form means it doesn't feel too obnoxious).

You can't even blame Konami for this one either. There's nothing about her which suggests she wasn't designed like this as opposed to a result of the dev cycle being fucky, like the "Kingdom of the flies" mission we only have bits of. It screams Kojima being horny and putting his fetishs into his work for all to see.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: BrawlMan

Ag3ma

Elite Member
Jan 4, 2023
2,574
2,208
118
Is this thread just 90% ridiculous Japanese costume designs?

edit: ok, maybe about 70.
Yes. And it should be, because if anything does f***ing ridiculous character design and knocks it out of the park of absurdity, it's Japanese computer games.

I refuse to buy pretty much any game with anime style graphics. Just hate it all.
 
  • Like
Reactions: XsjadoBlaydette

BrawlMan

Lover of beat'em ups.
Legacy
Mar 10, 2016
29,377
12,228
118
Detroit, Michigan
Country
United States of America
Gender
Male
NG2_Art_CharOther_Sonia_1.jpg







 
Last edited:

FakeSympathy

Elite Member
Legacy
Jun 8, 2015
3,488
3,222
118
Seattle, WA
Country
US
The entirety of Sonic Boom characters, especially Knuckles (seriously, when did he do steroids?)
sonic_boom_characters.jpg

The Tingle brothers. They honestly come up as pedos imo
TWW_Tingle_Brothers_Artwork.png

Conker redesign for HoloLens. Forget the tech itself, who in their right minds would think Conker would be a good character for something that's designed for familiy game?
conker.0.png

I hate D.VA. Is this the best Blizzard could do to represent the people of my country? A fucking pro gamer and a streamer who turned into a fighter? Especially how she was designed to be an eye-candy bait that would no doubt generate a crap load of porn and deviant arts.
dva_screenshot_001.jpgDVA_LIGHTGUN.jpg
 

BrawlMan

Lover of beat'em ups.
Legacy
Mar 10, 2016
29,377
12,228
118
Detroit, Michigan
Country
United States of America
Gender
Male
The entirety of Sonic Boom characters, especially Knuckles (seriously, when did he do steroids?)
sonic_boom_characters.jpg
Honestly, I don't mind the re-designs, and Amy got the best change. The TV series does the designs a bit more credit. More so in the second season, because of the animation bump. Knuckles, they tried too hard in making him the tank. Literally. They made him dumb too. Even when it led to some funny moments. Also, his entire backstory is gone in the Boom universe. He's just some guy who hangs around with the other 3 (4 when we're counting Sticks in the TV series and Fire 🔥 & Ice ❄ 3DS sequel) whenever.

I hate D.VA. Is this the best Blizzard could do to represent the people of my country? A fucking pro gamer and a streamer who turned into a fighter? Especially how she was designed to be an eye-candy bait that would no doubt generate a crap load of porn and deviant arts.
dva_screenshot_001.jpg
DVA_LIGHTGUN.jpg
D.VA design I didn't mind, but she is literally a Korean Eva pilot. Lighter and softer than her original counterparts. Still better than Asuka.

That topmost picture could also be subtitled "Bitches love cannons!"
Indeed, it is.

She uses her chevage cleavage to collect bullet casings.
:cool::sneaky:
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Dalisclock

Worgen

Follower of the Glorious Sun Butt.
Legacy
Apr 1, 2009
14,981
3,843
118
Gender
Whatever, just wash your hands.
How the hell did my spell checker ding cleavage but change it to chevage.... what the hell is chevage? Searches.... that is an old ass unused word.
 
  • Like
Reactions: BrawlMan

Dalisclock

Making lemons combustible again
Legacy
Escapist +
Feb 9, 2008
11,286
7,082
118
A Barrel In the Marketplace
Country
Eagleland
Gender
Male
I hate D.VA. Is this the best Blizzard could do to represent the people of my country? A fucking pro gamer and a streamer who turned into a fighter? Especially how she was designed to be an eye-candy bait that would no doubt generate a crap load of porn and deviant arts.
View attachment 7996View attachment 7997
It is a bit much, yeah. Even I know Korea has culture beyond Starcraft players.

Quite an interesting one to boot, including a very long running feud over a gravesite that the (now dead) King told the heads of both families to fuck off because he was getting sick of their shit.


Yoon Gwan, who expanded Korea's northern territories, died in 1111 and was buried in this hill. But the tomb was lost as continuous wars ravaged the country and his family's power declined. When Shim Ji Won, the prime minister, died in 1662, his family buried him in the same hill.

The feud erupted in the mid-18th century when the Yoon clan, with its influence on the rise again, rediscovered the general's grave - as it turned out, only meters downhill from Shim's.

Petitions and clashes followed. King Young Jo presided over a hearing in 1764 and ordered the clans to respect the two graves as they were. But the families continued to bicker, vandalizing each other's tombs, and the irate king punished the 70-year-old patriarchs of the rival factions by flogging and exiling them. One of them, a Yoon, died from the effects of the beating. Animosity only deepened.
Yep, there's a lot going on there.Also, yes I know this should go in the "I learned today" thread.
 
Last edited:

Gordon_4

The Big Engine
Legacy
Apr 3, 2020
6,432
5,691
118
Australia
She uses her chevage to collect bullet casings.
That sounds painful

I hate D.VA. Is this the best Blizzard could do to represent the people of my country? A fucking pro gamer and a streamer who turned into a fighter? Especially how she was designed to be an eye-candy bait that would no doubt generate a crap load of porn and deviant arts.

View attachment 7996View attachment 7997
I'll pay it being culturally reductive, but D.Va is hardly the only one they make porn of. In fact I don't think there's a single character - bar the hamster - who hasn't starred on the 'Hub.
 

Dalisclock

Making lemons combustible again
Legacy
Escapist +
Feb 9, 2008
11,286
7,082
118
A Barrel In the Marketplace
Country
Eagleland
Gender
Male
I'll pay it being culturally reductive, but D.Va is hardly the only one they make porn of. In fact I don't think there's a single character - bar the hamster - who hasn't starred on the 'Hub.
I'm willing to bet somewhere on Deviantart there's an athro sexy version of that fucking hamster. Because there's always that fucking guy who has to make things wierd.
 
  • Like
Reactions: BrawlMan

NerfedFalcon

Level i Flare!
Mar 23, 2011
7,210
949
118
Gender
Male
The terrible secret most freelance artists don't want people to know is the mad amount of bank you can make doing commission work for people with... quite different tastes.
As one shitpost thread put it:

"Doctor: $140,000 a year
Furry artist on Patreon: $160,000 a year"

OP was told he was lowballing the furry artist's income.
 

RhombusHatesYou

Surreal Estate Agent
Mar 21, 2010
7,595
1,914
118
Between There and There.
Country
The Wide, Brown One.
As one shitpost thread put it:

"Doctor: $140,000 a year
Furry artist on Patreon: $160,000 a year"

OP was told he was lowballing the furry artist's income.
Most artists will, at some point, be made an offer along the lines of "I'll give you a stupid amount of money for a picture of Sailor Moon shitting in Tuxedo Mask's mouth"*.


* For people wondering about that particular example, its one that was made to me back in the day. As the song goes "I ran. I ran so far away."
 
  • Like
Reactions: Dalisclock

Zykon TheLich

Extra Heretical!
Legacy
Jun 6, 2008
3,495
834
118
Country
UK
Yes. And it should be, because if anything does f***ing ridiculous character design and knocks it out of the park of absurdity, it's Japanese computer games.

I refuse to buy pretty much any game with anime style graphics. Just hate it all.
Me too, it's an instant turn off.

Which is a shame, as I do like fantasy RPGs and I don't get on with the Baldurs Gate/Dragon Age etc style ones. But from what I can see the main alternative seems to be the turn based tactics type RPG and 90% of that is accompanied by hideous anime bullshit. Even if it goes for more grounded designs the art style puts me off.
 

Baffle

Elite Member
Oct 22, 2016
3,476
2,758
118
I refuse to buy pretty much any game with anime style graphics. Just hate it all.
I kinda suffer from this as well. I don't even look at games on Steam if they've used anime artwork for the promo - I'm just instantly not interested. I might be missing out on some really good gameplay I guess, but I don't really think I am.