Quick! War has broken out!

[Asickorphan]

I would take the sword that is the room I'm in... but thats cheating >.< oh well !!!!!LEVEL UP!!!!

 

[Vampire cat]

Defense? Against fire-arms? Le-harr. I'd bring a bottle of coke, at least I'd have something to drink while they are shooting me to bits. Offensive... Hmm. Seeing as my living room (where my PC is) and the kitchen is in the same room, I'd just grab a good old kitchen knife I guess, nothing wrong with that ^^.

I live in Iceland, who is suppose to attack us?

*murderous glare*

Make no mistake tho, If I'm coming, it's to capture Lambi and put him in my evil doomsday-prison! Don't underestimate the POWER of the Norwegian army! AAAHAHAH! (Oh and we like ice and mountains, we'd have every reason to attack you OO).

 

[spartan1077]

I'm in Canada, so this is more or less impossible. I'll just sit back and let the US army take care of it.

Go no weapon laws! Canada rules BTW.

OT: I would use my assassin's creed blade that I made after watching that video..oh we can't use things designed as weapons? And we can't use fictional items that I don't have...? Damn.... Well since everything is designed to be a weapon in the right mind I will use my MIND! And die a painful death.

 

[Irony's Acolyte]

I'll use my life size cut-out of Emperor Palpatine as a shield and one of the cardboard tubes as a weapon. If Penny Arcade has taught me anything, its that cardboard is as deadly as hell.

Beware the cardboard knight...

 

[AlwaystheUnlucky]

Defense: (Badly Drawn) Combat Medic Patch. According to the Geneva Convention, firing on one is a war crime, and if the enemy forces are strong enough to invade the U.S., they'll have to respect that.

Offense: Well, I've got a steel can... of ANTIMATTER!

 

[Free Thinker]

I've got some pistols, and I can improvise a metal shield from things from the basement.

 

[Drakmorg]

I could use my chair as a shield and maybe bludgeon people to death with my biggest hardcover book, which happens to be a book of medical terminology. Maybe they'll take extra damage from the sheer irony of my attack.

"You hit enemy soldier for 12 points of blunt damage"
"Enemy soldier takes 1000 points of irony damage"
"Enemy soldier explodes into a fine red mist"
"You find $12"

 

[CarlsonAndPeeters]

For defense, I would grab my Bartlett's Familiar Quotations. I think it could stop a bullet.

For offense, I would either grab my laptop--hacking into the enemy servers would be a great battle strategy, if I could hack--or my bass guitar. Because as Dead Rising taught me, guitars make kick-ass music while they slaughter peons.

 

[Atmos Duality]

"Defend yourself" topic count within the last week: 5

I figured one more of these would pop up.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

Something to defend myself with, of course.

 

[Zuljeet]

Well, since I live in Alaska the only people who would attack us is Russians wanting Alaska back and since they have such a big army I'll side with them.

Nobody asked for the effing Palins to chime in on this...

 

[Skorpyo]

For attack, I grab my CZ-52.

For defense, I break a large chunk out of my desk.

 

[Dylan Voyda]

I take the wok on my stove.

 

[CanadianBacon]

Defense: I grab the nearest empty DVD case to my desk.
Offense: Best I can find is an Air Soft pistol in my closet.

 

[Hemlet]

for answers 1 and 2: My walking stick

Spoiler

It's made of polypropylene, is tough enough to smash a cinder block with without major damage to the stick itself, and most importantly it's CLASSY. I love this thing

 

[Cpu46]

For defense i would use the door to my dorm room, its made of really dense wood.

For offense, I shall use my towel.

 

[Steamtech]

Defense: I'd have to go with the Random House Encyclopedia: Thick enough to stop bullets.
Offense: My Computer, i'll run the ECM and screw with their missiles, for people, my Swiss Army Knife and Martial Arts

 

[Seydaman]

Why can't I take my sword
That is completely illogical

Fine, I'll take my closet door and a kitchen knife

 

[thiosk]

mini fridge

I apologize for not adding more to this thread, but you do realize refrigerators are primarily made of glorified styrofoam, yes?

 

[nintendoeats]

I'm in Canada, so this is more or less impossible. I'll just sit back and let the US army take care of it.

This is more or less exactly what I thought.

However... I have a Hammer in here because I was planning on putting up some stuff...like 3 months ago...

and...I could remove one of these hair dryers from my couch and just use the head part. You know those ones that stereotypical women gossip in? I would just use the head part. Yeah, I have one of those in my room.

I'm screwed aren't I?