Random/Memorable spam you've gotten

[Yureina]

I once got a phone message from a guy apparently calling his friend saying that he was lost driving around town and needed help to get back home. Also, the guy was totally stoned, admitting it several times during his message.

I found that quite amusing. XD

 

[NewYork_Comedian]

Instantly bookmarked.

But to be honest, I barely receive any spam besides the odd erectile dysfunction ad. My G-mail seems to be pretty good at blocking those annoying [but hilarious] emails.

 

[Miles000]

That is the best email anyone has ever received. Ever.

That's why I'm keeping it safe, in case chain emails start circulating again...

It's my 'Plan B-XD'

 

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

Spoiler

Dearest,

I am writing this mail to you with tears and sorrow from my heart. I will really like to have a good relationship with you, and I have a special reason why I decided to contact you.
I decided to contact you because of the urgency of my situation here ,I am Miss Jenet Harry Johnson 25years old girl from Liberia, the only daughter of Late prince Harry Johnson the deputy minister of national security under the leadership of president Charles Taylor who is now in exile after many innocent soul were killed ,My father was killed by government of Charles Taylor ,he accuse my father of coup attempt. I am constrained to contact you because of the maltreatment I, am receiving from my step mother. She planned to take away all my late father's treasury and properties from me since the unexpected death of my beloved Father. Meanwhile I wanted to escape to the Europe but she hides away my international passport and other valuable travelling documents.

Luckily she did not discover where I kept my father's File which contains important documents. So I decided to run to the refugee camp where I am presently seeking asylum under the United Nations High Commission for the Refugee here in Ouagadougou, Republic of Burkina Faso. I wish to contact you personally for a long term business relationship and investment assistance in your Country. My father of blessed memory deposited the sum of US$5, 7, Million Dollars in Bank with my name as the next of kin. However,

I shall forward you with the necessary documents on confirmation of your acceptance to assist me for the transfer and investment of the fund. As you will help me in an investment, and I will like to complete my studies, as I was in my 1st year in the university, when the crisis started. It is my intention to compensate you with 10% of the total money for your services and the balance shall be my investment capital.

This is the reason why I decided to contact you. Please all communications should be through this email address only for confidential purposes. As soon as I receive your positive response showing your interest I will put things into action immediately In the light of the above, I shall appreciate an urgent message indicating your ability and willingness to handle this transaction sincerely. I am staying at the female hostel. Awaiting your urgent and positive response. Please do keep this to yourself and every communications hall be made through this email address alone for confidential purpose and you should not disclose it till i come over , once the fund has been transferred.
Thanks, I will send you my pictures as soon as I Read from you again please tell me more about yourself.
Yours Love Sincerely,
Miss Jenet Harry Johnson.

Seems Legit.

I don't really ever look through Spam folders. (Nor my email adresses) But this makes me want to.

HOLY MOTHER OF SHIT
I have 403 spam emails! Thanks a fuck ton google! I'd litterially kill myself if those were jumbled into my usual youtube updates if I needed to find something important.

 

[Suicida1 Midget]

OK i dont mean to offend anyone, sorry for my horrible spelling but i cant find the original any place, so heres the most faithful copy of it that i can make.

Theres an autistic guy who isnt so bad that he cant live alone but hes still kinda-well yeah. So one day hes parents get a call from him and in an excited voice he says, 'mom, dad! guess what- i caught a troll!!!'. Hes parents thinking it was just him being him waved it off not caring. So he calls his brother saying the same thing. His brother thinks somethings up so he goes to see him.(for the sake of understanding ill call him jack.) So once jack arrives his brother is jumping around with glee and jack asks him,'ok, so where is this troll?' to which his brother replies, 'fallow me,' and runs into the house. Once jack catches up to him his brother is pratically jumping off the walls, and goes to open the closet. To jacks surprise there was a midget-tied and bound. Turns out, the midget was a johovas witness going door to door that day.

Best stroy spam that a friend forwarded me. Once again its not my acuall making, and i dont mean to offend anyone by it.

 

[MASTACHIEFPWN]

"Hello. I live in your city. I am lovely and wonderful. Probably trojan link originally hia! Some of my photos you can find on"
Lolin'
There are also a lot of creepy erectile disfunction pill offers, and a few from a place called "COBRA-SOLUTIONS"... Hmm... I wonder who could be in charge of that...

"Sssssend him the ssssspam!"