Rare Exports: The Creepiest Santa Movie You'll Ever See

vansau

Mortician of Love
May 25, 2010
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Rare Exports: The Creepiest Santa Movie You'll Ever See


You better hope this version of Santa can't see you when you're sleeping...

Santa Claus is usually portrayed as a jolly fat man who loves children everywhere, rewarding all the good little boys and girls with their hearts' desires and punishing the naughty kids with lumps of coal. However, an upcoming Holiday Season film eschews this personification in lieu of what is quite possibly the most unsettling and creepy version of St. Nick to make it into movie theaters. For your viewing ... pleasure ... I give you the trailer for Rare Exports.

The movie is by Jalmari Helander, based on his Rare Exports series of short films. The plot revolves around how an archaeological expedition ends up freeing the original, evil, Santa - whom all the legends are based on - from a frozen mountain prison. Once freed, this Santa is responsible for slaughtered herds of reindeer, child abductions, and other suitably over-the-top horror movie behavior.

If you've got some hesitations about the film based on this description, that's understandable. However, it's apparently pretty good, according to <a href=http://www.variety.com/review/VE1117943330.html?u=IMDB&p=H2BE&cs=1>Variety's review:

By playing it straight, the ultra-serious tone captures all the stereotypes of the genre while gently poking fun at the conventions, so laughs go hand-in-hand with a genuine creepiness. Elements may frighten small children: Santa (Peeter Jakobi) has a truly evil mien, and nasty elves, played by naked elderly men, are more likely to torment kiddies than give them gifts.

The movie's being billed as a horror/comedy, though the trailer doesn't portray the comedy quite as much as one might expect. Rare Exports is set for a December 3rd release, though just how wide that release will be remains to be seen.

Source: <a href=http://www.rareexportsmovie.com/en>Official Site



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Duffeknol

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Aug 28, 2010
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Interesting. Comes out right when here in the Netherlands we're having our own Sinterklaas (our version of Santa) horror movie.
 

Impluse_101

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Jun 25, 2009
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What...the....f*ck....is this sh*t?!?!



I...just...NO! Really...just...no...
Stop..stop now or forever hold your peace.
 

deth2munkies

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Jan 28, 2009
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Silent Night: Deadly Night 2 is the most terrible Santa movie ever.

Guy goes crazy, puts on Santa costume, chops people up, GARBAGE DAY!

 

JaredXE

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Apr 1, 2009
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Since it's built around the original version of Santa (punishes naughty kids as opposed to rewarding good ones), this looks hilarious and hopefully will make it over to the States and teach people the true meaning of the holidays.
 

Mr.Mattress

Level 2 Lumberjack
Jul 17, 2009
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... What is this, I don't even know what this is... How is that santa bad? What did he do? Why's he in a cage? Why is he burried underground?

This movie trailer is forcing me to ask questions, but this Santa Claus is not Scary at all...
 

Death God

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Jul 6, 2010
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I seen the short movies of this. They are pretty funny but this may be pushing it...
 

nagi

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Mar 20, 2009
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Nice to see this. I genuinely LOL'd at the older videos of rare exports, this might be an all-night laugh.
 

William Dickbringer

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Feb 16, 2010
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I really have no idea what to the movie I mean I like how the trailer said nothing so now I'm really curious
The3rdEye said:
I counter with the following for the title of this thread.

...what? Now I'm even more stumped
 

Retodon8

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Jun 25, 2008
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Duffeknol said:
Interesting. Comes out right when here in the Netherlands we're having our own Sinterklaas (our version of Santa) horror movie.
Reading the headline, I was wondering if this could be about that film for a second.
I guess it's just a coincidence.

JaredXE said:
Since it's built around the original version of Santa (punishes naughty kids as opposed to rewarding good ones) (...)
It's just a film, even if the trailer says it is "the truth"... it's not.