Real Final Fantasy VII Weaponry Causes Spinal Injuries

[Nieroshai]

One word: Duh.
When Zack Fair talks to his mentor about the Buster Sword, he comments on how pointlessly heavy it is, and the mentor comments on how he carries it so as to not use it as some sort of philosophical message. Mostly, he treats it like a back weight. Also note that Shinra SOLDIERs are Mako-infused, making them as strong as Master Chief physically, at least at first. You know how magic gets. So yeah, obtain magic glowing steroids, then come back and try again.

 

[SanguineSymphony]

This is one of those Captain Obvious moments where you have to doubt someone's common sense and possibly intelligence.

 

[TilMorrow]

Use your Limit Break!

 

[Centrophy]

Bah, if you're going to make the buster sword then you should make it out of an alloy like carbotanium (carbon fiber and titanium). Would cost a mint, but hey, then at least a normal person with Cloud's build could wield it and it would be still be strong enough to smash things and you'd look cool doing it. Well cool to the JRPG/anime crowd at least, not like that's hard.

Also, the video looked rehearsed. His family, friend, and himself looked like they were just mugging for the camera instead of playing it straight.

 

[ckam]

Well, I guess the SOLDIER program did help out.

 

[TheFinalFantasyWolf]

Holy crap i would buy one! I wonder if he'll consisder making one if i pay him...ima hang it on the wall in my bedroom....freaking EPIC

 

[ProfessorLayton]

I think that sword would be better off displayed on a wall or something... pretty cool, but that's just beyond impractical.

 

[Glademaster_v1legacy]

snipped

The mocking sterotype for ff male characters are spikey haired skinny teens with a chip on their shoulder and big swords. They don't want cloud to look older, thats just the whole continuation thing. He is short has the same hair in the flashbacks(in ff7) and never really changes besides clothing and attitude. He is supposed to stay the same late teens looking person throughout even in advent he looks the same.

Maybe his hair changes a little but its very little.

But Cloud is the only one with properly spiky hair and is still not a teen. Even Squall's, Tidus' or Zindane's can't really be considered spiky. Just because someone looks young doesn't make them young. I know a 24 year old who still gets his id checked and I know 16 year olds that can buy drink without an id check.

 

[ShadowKatt]

I watched the buster sword clip AND the masamune clip, and apparently we have nothing to fear. Both swords look largely ineffective at causing any damage. The buster sword looked about as effective as a warhammer, which while deadly, isn't saying much.

 

[dmase]

snipped

The mocking sterotype for ff male characters are spikey haired skinny teens with a chip on their shoulder and big swords. They don't want cloud to look older, thats just the whole continuation thing. He is short has the same hair in the flashbacks(in ff7) and never really changes besides clothing and attitude. He is supposed to stay the same late teens looking person throughout even in advent he looks the same.

Maybe his hair changes a little but its very little.

But Cloud is the only one with properly spiky hair and is still not a teen. Even Squall's, Tidus' or Zindane's can't really be considered spiky. Just because someone looks young doesn't make them young. I know a 24 year old who still gets his id checked and I know 16 year olds that can buy drink without an id check.

Look at their hair again, look at the sharp edges now tell me is that realistic in the slightest? I'm thinking not and they are supposed to look teen because their marketing demographic wants to look that way. Its a standard in your average japanese development, having a very young male protagonist that has a slight change maybe half way through a series to make them look maturer but not older.

Now i'm gonna take a guess here because i haven't played ff7 in a long time but they don't specifically mention cloud's age through the whole videogame. Maybe in the flashback sections when he is in the infantry or in his hometown but not the game. I'm gonna go on a leap and say they didn't nail down his age till they started adding on to the series with advent and crisis core. He fits in the sterotype in appearance and action of your jrpg character, a little more involved by the creators tho.

 

[ladysephiroth]

snipped

The mocking sterotype for ff male characters are spikey haired skinny teens with a chip on their shoulder and big swords. They don't want cloud to look older, thats just the whole continuation thing. He is short has the same hair in the flashbacks(in ff7) and never really changes besides clothing and attitude. He is supposed to stay the same late teens looking person throughout even in advent he looks the same.

Maybe his hair changes a little but its very little.

But Cloud is the only one with properly spiky hair and is still not a teen. Even Squall's, Tidus' or Zindane's can't really be considered spiky. Just because someone looks young doesn't make them young. I know a 24 year old who still gets his id checked and I know 16 year olds that can buy drink without an id check.

Look at their hair again, look at the sharp edges now tell me is that realistic in the slightest? I'm thinking not and they are supposed to look teen because their marketing demographic wants to look that way. Its a standard in your average japanese development, having a very young male protagonist that has a slight change maybe half way through a series to make them look maturer but not older.

Now i'm gonna take a guess here because i haven't played ff7 in a long time but they don't specifically mention cloud's age through the whole videogame. Maybe in the flashback sections when he is in the infantry or in his hometown but not the game. I'm gonna go on a leap and say they didn't nail down his age till they started adding on to the series with advent and crisis core. He fits in the sterotype in appearance and action of your jrpg character, a little more involved by the creators tho.

I'm not sure how to snip all that ...

Pretty much all of the canon/strat guides from the games say that Cloud was 21 during FF7 and 16 during Crisis Core, so I'll that that as a for sure. Even one of the guides I got in 1997 has that stuff in it.

 

[ladysephiroth]

snipped

The mocking sterotype for ff male characters are spikey haired skinny teens with a chip on their shoulder and big swords. They don't want cloud to look older, thats just the whole continuation thing. He is short has the same hair in the flashbacks(in ff7) and never really changes besides clothing and attitude. He is supposed to stay the same late teens looking person throughout even in advent he looks the same.

Maybe his hair changes a little but its very little.

But Cloud is the only one with properly spiky hair and is still not a teen. Even Squall's, Tidus' or Zindane's can't really be considered spiky. Just because someone looks young doesn't make them young. I know a 24 year old who still gets his id checked and I know 16 year olds that can buy drink without an id check.

Look at their hair again, look at the sharp edges now tell me is that realistic in the slightest? I'm thinking not and they are supposed to look teen because their marketing demographic wants to look that way. Its a standard in your average japanese development, having a very young male protagonist that has a slight change maybe half way through a series to make them look maturer but not older.

Now i'm gonna take a guess here because i haven't played ff7 in a long time but they don't specifically mention cloud's age through the whole videogame. Maybe in the flashback sections when he is in the infantry or in his hometown but not the game. I'm gonna go on a leap and say they didn't nail down his age till they started adding on to the series with advent and crisis core. He fits in the sterotype in appearance and action of your jrpg character, a little more involved by the creators tho.

Not sure how to snip that ... I can't understand the code.

Pretty much all of the canon and strat guides they put out say that Cloud was 21 during FF7 and 16 during Crisis Core. Even the FF7 guide that I got in 1997 with the game. I'll take that as pretty official...I'm sure in Ultimania it says for sure. Either way, it's a redonkulous sword.

EDIT: Someone delete this duplicate post ... I dont' know what's wrong with my internet. It's going up and down like a yo-yo.

 

[dmase]

snipped

Get the first line of the [*quote=random shit]snipped[/*quote] Minus the *

What i'm saying is in the original game there isn't a reference to his age(i'm assuming), crisis core and advent etc started the canon of ff7. When sony knew things where going to go much farther they made a huge backstory with the filler every jrpg player loves. He could have very well been 18 or 19 because that is what he is supposed to look like. A young skinny blond kid. When you put the whole of the story together it makes it hard to add in his time in the infantry his time with Alex(?) their time during crisis. All leading up to ff7.

The stereotype of FF characters are young, skinny, giant sword wielding, and spikey haired. Which is why i said teen in the first post, cuz thats part of the joke.

 

[gphjr14]

Well. I was going to mock them for not being able to wield something that only weighs 54lb, but after seeing it, yeah. That thing looks unbalanced and unwieldy as fuck.

If you want to wield a sword effectively it shouldn't be anymore than 5 lb. Anti-calvary swords usually don't go above 10 lbs. Trying to "wield" something that ways 54 lbs is stupid and to try to will result in injury as this dumbass discovered.

Its just another example of, "just because you can doesn't mean you should."

Maybe this guy'll try jumping off his house and flying since Cloud was able to fight in the air with little regard for physics.

 

[Glademaster_v1legacy]

snipped

The mocking sterotype for ff male characters are spikey haired skinny teens with a chip on their shoulder and big swords. They don't want cloud to look older, thats just the whole continuation thing. He is short has the same hair in the flashbacks(in ff7) and never really changes besides clothing and attitude. He is supposed to stay the same late teens looking person throughout even in advent he looks the same.

Maybe his hair changes a little but its very little.

But Cloud is the only one with properly spiky hair and is still not a teen. Even Squall's, Tidus' or Zindane's can't really be considered spiky. Just because someone looks young doesn't make them young. I know a 24 year old who still gets his id checked and I know 16 year olds that can buy drink without an id check.

Look at their hair again, look at the sharp edges now tell me is that realistic in the slightest? I'm thinking not and they are supposed to look teen because their marketing demographic wants to look that way. Its a standard in your average japanese development, having a very young male protagonist that has a slight change maybe half way through a series to make them look maturer but not older.

Now i'm gonna take a guess here because i haven't played ff7 in a long time but they don't specifically mention cloud's age through the whole videogame. Maybe in the flashback sections when he is in the infantry or in his hometown but not the game. I'm gonna go on a leap and say they didn't nail down his age till they started adding on to the series with advent and crisis core. He fits in the sterotype in appearance and action of your jrpg character, a little more involved by the creators tho.

They do state his age in flashbacks definitely. I can't remember in the main story 100% but it says his age in the game manual. Thanks for half reading my post. Cloud is the only protagonist with insanely spiky/unrealistic hair ever other main character in every other game is fairly normal. Yes joke about Cloud fair enough but as I already said and I am repeating myself here Cloud is the only protagonist with completely unobtainable/realistic hair.