Reliable Source: I Sometimes Shoplift From GameStop

silversun101

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Nov 12, 2009
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I share Marion's enjoyment of watching children convince their parents to buy M-rated titles through strategies that span from pleading and guilt to outright lies. This pleasure is effectively doubled by the fact that, as an employee, I am the jagged rocks their young and bright-eyed dreams will be dashed upon. Nothing breaks up the monotony of days filled with kids trading in boxes of GBA games with the labels removed or people thinking we are a tech support hotline than single-handedly denying Gears of War 2 to 13-year-old ritalin junkie. What's best about this experience is, as a young 20-something, these kids initially look to me as friend and ally, assuming that, like some benevolent Big Brother, I will take their side in the debate. As I list reasons both true and fictional as to why their child should never be allowed to play this - nor any - mature game, I must consciously remember not to smile as the look of shock and confusion on their grubby little faces slowly gives away to that vacant stare of deep and weighted finality. It is defeat they are experiencing, pure and unadulterated; born heavy upon their shoulders to forever more drag the stars down from the heavens in their eyes to be trodden into the mud by the uncaring swine of the world.

Good life training and I am glad to be a part of it.
 

Quiet Stranger

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Feb 4, 2006
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Soooooo does he actually steal from Gamestop? Cause I'm pretty sure that's impossible, considering they keep all their CDs behind the counter
 

Flight

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Mar 13, 2010
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A funny and interesting read, especially considering that I used to work at GameStop - and yes, we kept all our games behind the counter while keeping a display box on the shelf. Hilarity sometimes ensued.
 

raunchysandwich

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Apr 19, 2008
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seems to me this article is a cry for help, because I can not begin to understand why she would steal MadWorld if she doesn't even have a Wii
 

Darth_Dude

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Jul 11, 2008
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silversun101 said:
I share Gil's enjoyment of watching children convince their parents to buy M-rated titles through strategies that span from pleading and guilt to outright lies. This pleasure is effectively doubled by the fact that, as an employee, I am the jagged rocks their young and bright-eyed dreams will be dashed upon. Nothing breaks up the monotony of days filled with kids trading in boxes of GBA games with the labels removed or people thinking we are a tech support hotline than single-handedly denying Gears of War 2 to 13-year-old ritalin junkie. What's best about this experience is, as a young 20-something, these kids initially look to me as friend and ally, assuming that, like some benevolent Big Brother, I will take their side in the debate. As I list reasons both true and fictional as to why their child should never be allowed to play this - nor any - mature game, I must consciously remember not to smile as the look of shock and confusion on their grubby little faces slowly gives away to that vacant stare of deep and weighted finality. It is defeat they are experiencing, pure and unadulterated; born heavy upon their shoulders to forever more drag the stars down from the heavens in their eyes to be trodden into the mud by the uncaring swine of the world.

Good life training and I am glad to be a part of it.
You seem like a really mean person.
And yet, I would pay to see that.
I would pay alot.
 

Darth_Dude

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Jul 11, 2008
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raunchysandwich said:
seems to me this article is a cry for help, because I can not begin to understand why she would steal MadWorld if she doesn't even have a Wii
WAIT, isn't marion a man?
 

Mr. Blik

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Apr 14, 2009
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Darth_Dude said:
silversun101 said:
I share Gil's enjoyment of watching children convince their parents to buy M-rated titles through strategies that span from pleading and guilt to outright lies. This pleasure is effectively doubled by the fact that, as an employee, I am the jagged rocks their young and bright-eyed dreams will be dashed upon. Nothing breaks up the monotony of days filled with kids trading in boxes of GBA games with the labels removed or people thinking we are a tech support hotline than single-handedly denying Gears of War 2 to 13-year-old ritalin junkie. What's best about this experience is, as a young 20-something, these kids initially look to me as friend and ally, assuming that, like some benevolent Big Brother, I will take their side in the debate. As I list reasons both true and fictional as to why their child should never be allowed to play this - nor any - mature game, I must consciously remember not to smile as the look of shock and confusion on their grubby little faces slowly gives away to that vacant stare of deep and weighted finality. It is defeat they are experiencing, pure and unadulterated; born heavy upon their shoulders to forever more drag the stars down from the heavens in their eyes to be trodden into the mud by the uncaring swine of the world.

Good life training and I am glad to be a part of it.
You seem like a really mean person.
And yet, I would pay to see that.
I would pay alot.
Good god....
suddenly, i have an urge to have a conversation with you....
 

Fappy

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May 1, 2020
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Gamestop keeps the actual games behind the counter right? Hope you enjoyed all those empty boxes you shoplifted :p
 

Furrama

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Jul 24, 2008
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silversun101 said:
I share Gil's enjoyment of watching children convince their parents to buy M-rated titles through strategies that span from pleading and guilt to outright lies. This pleasure is effectively doubled by the fact that, as an employee, I am the jagged rocks their young and bright-eyed dreams will be dashed upon. Nothing breaks up the monotony of days filled with kids trading in boxes of GBA games with the labels removed or people thinking we are a tech support hotline than single-handedly denying Gears of War 2 to 13-year-old ritalin junkie. What's best about this experience is, as a young 20-something, these kids initially look to me as friend and ally, assuming that, like some benevolent Big Brother, I will take their side in the debate. As I list reasons both true and fictional as to why their child should never be allowed to play this - nor any - mature game, I must consciously remember not to smile as the look of shock and confusion on their grubby little faces slowly gives away to that vacant stare of deep and weighted finality. It is defeat they are experiencing, pure and unadulterated; born heavy upon their shoulders to forever more drag the stars down from the heavens in their eyes to be trodden into the mud by the uncaring swine of the world.

Good life training and I am glad to be a part of it.
This. This is epic. I golf clap for your comment sir.