- Mar 17, 2012
- 5,950
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[Img_Inline width="300" height="270" Caption="It's like Ghostbusters but filled with Steampunk and disappointment"]http://i.imgur.com/9GoYTBp.jpg
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When people say length matters when it comes to sexual satisfaction, a tempest of rebuttal is heard that says it's how you use it and not the length. This is a philosophy that is shared by The Order:1886's director Dana Jan in an exclusive interview
"It's not OUR fault that that the game fails to live up to to the extravagant demands of our audience! I blame pornography for unrealistic expectations of game length. Nothing is ever as long as it seems and they're making it seem bigger than it is with fancy camera angles and padding" said Jan.
Jan further went on to explain his metaphor of how gameplay is the same as schlong size.
"My personal metric is that one hour of gameplay equals one inch. You wouldn't want a guy with a 50 inch salami sandwich; it's impractical, as are 50 hour games! A nice 5-6 hour game at full price makes a perfect package for our team. You can even fit it in a box, just like that one song!"
"Besides, we all know that gamers don't exactly have testicular fortitude. Maybe if they spent less time jerking it to hentai and spend that time on our game they'd feel better. They could never please a women because the only ones they know of are from anime, the f**king weabs" said Jan, as he held his hand for a high-five
Sadly, Jan was left hanging as this reporter believes that gamers shouldn't be blamed for wanting something bigger and at 60 FPS.
<a href=http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lj7cfqzVth1qafrh6.jpg>Source
-TACO News: Whips his Dick Back and Forth
<color=darkred>Older News: <url=http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.871162-REPORT-Escapist-Fires-Everybody>Escapist Fires Everybody
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When people say length matters when it comes to sexual satisfaction, a tempest of rebuttal is heard that says it's how you use it and not the length. This is a philosophy that is shared by The Order:1886's director Dana Jan in an exclusive interview
"It's not OUR fault that that the game fails to live up to to the extravagant demands of our audience! I blame pornography for unrealistic expectations of game length. Nothing is ever as long as it seems and they're making it seem bigger than it is with fancy camera angles and padding" said Jan.
Jan further went on to explain his metaphor of how gameplay is the same as schlong size.
"My personal metric is that one hour of gameplay equals one inch. You wouldn't want a guy with a 50 inch salami sandwich; it's impractical, as are 50 hour games! A nice 5-6 hour game at full price makes a perfect package for our team. You can even fit it in a box, just like that one song!"
"Besides, we all know that gamers don't exactly have testicular fortitude. Maybe if they spent less time jerking it to hentai and spend that time on our game they'd feel better. They could never please a women because the only ones they know of are from anime, the f**king weabs" said Jan, as he held his hand for a high-five
Sadly, Jan was left hanging as this reporter believes that gamers shouldn't be blamed for wanting something bigger and at 60 FPS.
<a href=http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lj7cfqzVth1qafrh6.jpg>Source
-TACO News: Whips his Dick Back and Forth
<color=darkred>Older News: <url=http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.871162-REPORT-Escapist-Fires-Everybody>Escapist Fires Everybody
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