REPORT: Scientist Does Something He Probably Shouldn't Have

[PsychicTaco115]

[Img_Inline width="250" height="230" Caption="Still more credible than the 9/11 Commission Report"]http://i.imgur.com/0p0Eflx.jpg
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Science's track record is what the general populace (aka normies) would call a "mixed bag." The good (fire, internet, memes) and the bad (chemical weapons, giant ants) usually cancel each other out to form the grayest of grey zones. However, recent events have firmly put science in the same category as your problematic fave; definitely a bad influence buy you just can't help it because it's so kawaii. This is due to the recent escape of a clone of Adolf Hitler in mainland Europe yesterday.

"Yes, I saw the risks and and I still did it. Why? Sometimes you have to be the one who does what no one else wants to do. Plus, Dave at Marketing triple-dog dared me to do it; there's no coming back from that. So really, we should be blaming Dave for this. I've got his address if you want to go pitchfork crazy on his ass" said Jim Wyatt, the man who probably shouldn't have done this in the first place.

So far, the clone of Hitler has not started the Fourth Reich yet but is instead trying to rally the Syrian refugees into his own personal army to forcefully take over the Reichland.

Stay tuned for the eventual claims that this Hitler did nothing wrong either.

<a href=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4RuB3gT8t0>Source

-TACO News: Fourth Reich Media Mogul
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[DefunctTheory]

What is with scientist and their obsession with Hitler?

Everyone was in favor of saving Hitler's brain. But when you put it in the body of a great white shark. Ooo, suddenly you go too far!

I demand we abolish the practice of science, and return to the time tested truth finding method of cutting open still living heathens and members of 'sexual perversion' movements, and divining technological advancement from the outlines their guts form.

 

[Zontar]

What is with scientist and their obsession with Hitler?

Are you implying there isn't a reason to obsess over Hitler?

As for the matter at hand, as a completely non-biased scientist totally normal person, I have to say that not only has science not gone too far, but it has gone not too far enough! Although they exist, we have yet to refine and reach the full potential of weaponized memes, and I care not how many pepes must be dissected before we can land a man on the moon using steel memes.

 

[FalloutJack]

Umm, I have a question. Did scientific progress go 'Boink'? And if so, where is the Transmogryfier now?

 

[vallorn]

It's okay, we are currently studying the effects of Baneposting upon reality in an attempt to weaponize big guys (for you).

When our research is complete we shall be able to crash any plane (with no survivors). Surely this will be useful unless we are dealing with Mecha Hitler who might be a little more resilient against the magical scientific powers of weaponized memes.

 

[DefunctTheory]

What is with scientist and their obsession with Hitler?

Are you implying there isn't a reason to obsess over Hitler?

As for the matter at hand, as a completely non-biased scientist totally normal person, I have to say that not only has science not gone too far, but it has gone not too far enough! Although they exist, we have yet to refine and reach the full potential of weaponized memes, and I care not how many pepes must be dissected before we can land a man on the moon using steel memes.

Science loving heretic!

You better watch yourself. It wouldn't surprise me if sometime soon, someone poisoned your drink with a statistically irrelevant amount of arsenic, diluted so much you drop dead instantly.

 

[Saltyk]

I just want to know where Abradolf Lincler stands on all this. Is he going to join his half brother? Fight against him? The world must know!

 

[Fox12]

In other news he was admitted into a local community college art school where he's achieved moderate critical success and maintains a steady income. Is also dating a nice Jewish girl named Sara.

 

[Thaluikhain]

Fine then, I'll be in my quarters not haring my cloned cat-snake hybrids with the rest of the world.

One wonders what you are doing with them.

Not that I'm one to judge or anything, but that might be illegal.

 

[Mikeybb]

I too blame Dave for the tragic turn of events.
Someone pass me a pitchfork.

 

[Denamic]

Reductio ad Hitlerum in the OP. How far can we go?

 

[Something Amyss]

Taco, where have you been all my life?

Oh, I see how it i. You clone an army of dinosaurs, everybody cheers, you clone one little dictator to lead that army, everybody loses their minds! Fine then, I'll be in my quarters not haring my cloned cat-snake hybrids with the rest of the world.

Why would you want to create something that evil? I mean, cats AND snakes?

 

[davidmc1158_v1legacy]

Oh, I see how it i. You clone an army of dinosaurs, everybody cheers, you clone one little dictator to lead that army, everybody loses their minds! Fine then, I'll be in my quarters not haring my cloned cat-snake hybrids with the rest of the world.

Why would you want to create something that evil? I mean, cats AND snakes?

I take offense to that statement!

How dare you call snakes evil? They are friendly and cute. Unlike cats which are the scions of darkness in fur-covered form.

 

[008Zulu_v1legacy]

Oh, I see how it i. You clone an army of dinosaurs, everybody cheers

Riiight.

First comes the cheering, then comes the running and the screaming.

 

[PsychicTaco115]

Oh, I see how it i. You clone an army of dinosaurs, everybody cheers, you clone one little dictator to lead that army, everybody loses their minds!

To be fair, I think dinosaurs get a better rap than Hitler

I mean, what would you want; a cool creature or some fuckboi with a dumb mustache?

Taco, where have you been all my life?

In your heart <3

I too blame Dave for the tragic turn of events.
Someone pass me a pitchfork.

 

[Something Amyss]

To be fair, I think dinosaurs get a better rap than Hitler

It's deserved.

In your heart <3

The doctors said it was cholesterol!

 

[fix-the-spade]

So far, the clone of Hitler has not started the Fourth Reich yet

The First Reich lasted over a thousand years.
The Second Reich lasted fourty seven.
The Third Reich lasted twelve (although they were a very busy twelve).

The Fourth and Fifth Reich have probably already happened over the course of a summer holiday and a long weekend respectively, so no worries if the clone with a funny mustache tries to start number six, it'll probably be remembered as a somewhat disconcerting afternoon.

 

[vallorn]

Oh, I see how it i. You clone an army of dinosaurs, everybody cheers, you clone one little dictator to lead that army, everybody loses their minds! Fine then, I'll be in my quarters not haring my cloned cat-snake hybrids with the rest of the world.

Why would you want to create something that evil? I mean, cats AND snakes?

I take offense to that statement!

How dare you call snakes evil? They are friendly and cute. Unlike cats which are the scions of darkness in fur-covered form.

That explains why my cat has been daubing pentagrams on my walls with the blood of birds, rodents and rabbits and meowing "hail satan" at me repeatedly...

Oh, I see how it i. You clone an army of dinosaurs, everybody cheers

Riiight.

First comes the cheering, then comes the running and the screaming.

It's just not worth it to clone a dinosaur army if you don't install the laser eyes and neon coloured cybernetics into them. It does work if you power a megalomaniacal dictator with their blood though.

 

[Imp_Emissary]

Taco, where have you been all my life?

Oh, I see how it i. You clone an army of dinosaurs, everybody cheers, you clone one little dictator to lead that army, everybody loses their minds! Fine then, I'll be in my quarters not haring my cloned cat-snake hybrids with the rest of the world.

Why would you want to create something that evil? I mean, cats AND snakes?

Evil?

Spoiler: I think the word you're looking for is beautiful.

[http://imageshack.com/f/j3catsnake1j]
To be very fair, while they do look cute now, when they get into a couples quarrel it can turn into quite the hissy fit.
>

Spoiler: Bonus cat snake!

[http://imageshack.com/f/mhtumblrmk906bnmbz1s8mgkyg]

As for the topic at hand, as long as this isn't a clone that somehow has the memories of the person who they were cloned from thanks to some sci-fi bullshit, we should be fine.

 

[Something Amyss]

Spoiler: Bonus cat snake!

[http://imageshack.com/f/mhtumblrmk906bnmbz1s8mgkyg]

I have this strange suspicion that that's merely a cat pretending to be a snake.

Anyway, cats are the cutest form of evil, but they're still evil.