Colour-Scientist said:
I work in a store that sells sex toys and lingerie, how much time do you have?
As much time as you need.
OT: I work in a coffee shop. Most of our customers are fine, but every now and then we get one that doesn't seem fit to be walking around by themselves. Case in point:
A woman comes up to me at the till.
Customer: "Can I get a piece of banana bread?"
Me: "I'm sorry, we're all out for the day. All we have is what's in the display."
Customer: "No, there's always some underneath. They get some off the shelf." (There's a rack where we keep extra food behind the display, but the way the cash register is set up this rack is in full view of customers at the till. It's completely empty at the moment.)
Me: "I'm sorry, there's none on the shelf. We won't have any until tomorrow morning."
Customer: "No, there's always some. Go and check!"
Me: "Alright then."
I walk over to the shelf, which is very clearly empty, and stand there for a minute, pointedly staring at the barren shelves. Then I walk the two steps back to the register.
Me: "I'm sorry miss, like I said there isn't any there."
Customer: "You didn't look properly! Go and look again!"
Me: "Miss, there are other customers waiting to be helped. Would you like something from the display or not?"
Customer: "Hmph!" *storms off*
Edit: One more. Not stupid but still baffling.
There's this guy who comes in on a regular basis and tries to get free samples of coffee. At least 5 times a week he comes in, always asking for a sample and always of the same blend. Most of us are onto him and don't give him any, but whenever someone would does he asks for a bigger cup and asks us to top it up (which we aren't allowed to to even for people who legitimately want to sample a new blend). Then he goes outside and drives off in his clearly very expensive truck. To cap it off, he smells like he showers maybe once a month. Some people...