Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[brtshstel]

Granted.

I wish I had a good, working espresso machine.

 

[scorptatious]

Granted, but he won't approve of any Renegade choices you make.

I wish someone would make me chocolate pudding at 4 a.m.

 

[Eumersian]

Granted but it is total jankenstein.

I wish I knew the definition of the term "jankenstein".

 

[Solo-Wing]

Granted but you forget the definitions to all other words in the english language.

I wish I had a super computer.

 

[zfactor]

Granted, but it achieves self awareness and tries to kill all mankind.

I wish I had a super fast car.

 

[Robert632]

Granted. You get killed in a drag race crash because your car was too fast for you to control.

I wish for me to not feel like I'm sick.

 

[brtshstel]

Granted. Instead you feel like you're dying a painful death.

I wish for peanut butter.

 

[scorptatious]

Granted, but it gets stuck on the roof of your mouth, and you'll never get if off.

I wish there would be a new Gex game that didn't suck.

 

[Cash84]

Granted, but it blows instead.

I wish i had knives on chains like Kratos

 

[scorptatious]

Granted, but they are seared onto your skin, so you can never take them off.

I wish Fallout: New Vegas wasn't so buggy.

 

[zfactor]

Granted, but it requires more processing power than Crysis.

I wish I had some food right now.

 

[scorptatious]

Granted, but it's dog food.

I wish for the power of x-ray vision.

 

[zfactor]

Granted, but instead of X-Ray eyes, you get the electricity needed to run them (the "power" of them, get it? LOLZ).

I wish I had a cat.

 

[scorptatious]

Granted, but it's Big the cat.

I wish for immortality.

 

[Robert632]

Granted. However, after about a week of immortality, you fall in and are trapped forever in concrete, with no one ever knowing you were there.

I wish that I get to live in an igloo for a month.

 

[havass]

Granted, but you have no clothes.

I wish I get what I want.

 

[Holy_Handgrenade]

Granted but it's wage is so big you have to sell the house and the driveway.

I wish I was loved by women every where.

 

[scorptatious]

Granted, but Susan Boyle ends up on your doorstep.

I wish I had a pet duck.

 

[Robert632]

Granted, but it flies away and never come back after about a week.

I wish for more snow.

 

[MrJKapowey]

Granted, but there is so much snow that you are snowed in so heavily your house collapses.

I wish I hadn't prestiged...