Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, but you get R5-D4 instead. He will start your house on fire.

I wish for a quote message.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, but there's computer error and it didn't show up.

I wish for a lounge for my lazy lion.

 

[QuietCupOfTea]

Granted, but the lion thinks it's too small and attacks you.

I wish for a new MP3 player.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted but it only plays propaganda music files.

I wish for thirty seven donkeys.

 

[Eumersian]

Granted. You get a baker's 37 or donkeys, which is more than you can handle. Then you die of bone cancer.

I wish for no cancer.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted, enjoy that lightning strike.

I wish for more Captain America.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, go see the Avengers movie when it comes out, and maybe if we're lucky they'll make a sequel for ol' Cappy. And that it'll be just as good.

I wish for hot girl to keep suntanning in her backyard.

 

[AndyWest]

granted but so does her grand dad.

I wish for super powers.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, your super power is that you can hear snails crawl.

I wish to know what Katie said.

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

Granted. Shame it wasn't in English.

I wish I had a bigger TV.

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

[Edit]

 

[Sacman]

Granted, your TV is now so large it has destroyed the universe...

I wish I had a better classical guitar...

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

Granted. In exchange for your fingers.

I wish I could see through walls.

 

[Eumersian]

Granted. You keep seeing through the bathroom walls in nursing homes.

I wish I had a TARDIS.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, but then it's only a phonebooth in disguise, and you can only make a call on tuesdays at 3:41am.

I wish for a slice of cherry pie.

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

Granted. It's on top of the Taj Mahal.

I wish I could fly!

 

[Kieros]

You can fly, but only up to a certain height. And when you reach that height, you fall to your death. And you are not told what that height is.

I wish that the wish of the person two below me would not be granted.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

Granted, the person below you's wish is granted instead.

I wish for a cheerleader from the Saskatchewan Roughriders.

 

[Xpwn3ntial]

Granted, but she immediately leaves the vicinity without even giving you a passing glance.

I wish for a bullet to the head. Let's see that get corrupted.

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Granted but it explodes into pixie dust when it gets near your head, pixie dust that turns you into a slug.

I wish for books.