RvB

[Exile714]

Sarge: Once when I was a small child, I saw a man who claimed to be my uncle do this thing with a garden hose that still haunts me to this day...

 

[Larsirius]

O'Malley: It's quiet. Too quiet.*gunshot* Suddenly it's too loud. I preferred it when it was quiet.

Doc: You know, I really think we should try a NON-violent approach to resolve this.
O'Malley: I agree. Except replace the word "non" with "extremely," and after the word "violent," include the phrase, "BLOOD EXPLOSION EXTRAORDINAIRE!" HAHAHAHA!

Grif: So now we're forced to work together. How ironic.
Simmons: No, that's not ironic. Ironic would be if we had to work together to hurt each other.
Donut: No. Ironic would be instead of that guy kidnapping Lopez, Lopez kidnapped him.
Sarge: I think it would be ironic if our guns didn't shoot bullets, but instead squirted a healing salve that cured all wounds.
Caboose: I think it would be ironic if everyone was made of iron.

Grif: What about HD-DVD?
Sarge: Bad marketing. Not enough repeated letters in the name to be catchy. So it's being replaced with HHD DDVVDDBVDs.

The O'Malley one's the best!

 

[gothicjak]

The password is "password"

 

[starwarsgeek]

Any of the characters' catch phrases.

Near the end of season 5:

Spoiler

Wyoming: "Poor Tex, never knew when she was--"
Tucker: "--Defeated?" (while stabbing Wyoming in the back)

From the season 7 finale:

Spoiler

"I am not a thing! My name is Leonard Church, and YOU WILL FEAR MY LASER FACE!!!"

"That was the worst throw ever....of all time."
"That was the second worst throw ever....of all time."

 

[CATS FTW]

"And all women on the internet are dudes."

 

[OneOfTheMichael's]

You just got Sarge'd

 

[OneOfTheMichael's]

Oh and...
Churchoor jimmy was the last to go. It came from behind,ripped jimmy's skull out and started to beat him to death with it.
tucker:that doesn't even sound physically possible!
Church:Thats what jimmy kept saying.
Jimmy: This isn't even physically possible!!!

 

[Kurokami]

THERE IS NO ELEVEN YOU F**KING WHORE!

 

[Devon Dent]

What is he doing?
I don't know, it looks like he is killing himself.

 

[tristow]

"it's not pink it's lightish red!"