Smart-A$$ to authority

[Viptorian]

There is usually a reason a flight is delayed, the taxi broke down, weather is bad, disorderly passenger, runway is backed up. This is more akin to the pilot not letting people on the plane because he doesn't want them to hear him taking a shit, but he still takes a webcam with him to the bathroom.

That analogy doesn't work at all. You know what does?

It's akin to airport security not letting you get on your plane because there is a guy with a gun on a plane two gates down from you. No, you're not in immediate danger - yet - but you could be at some point.

You don't have to respect the cops, but they're still doing it for your safety, their safety, and the safety of the public at large. In the end, the safety of the masses is more important than your perceived right to go home and lounge.

You're a grown man (from the sounds of it, by age alone), so grow up and learn to deal with minor inconveniences. I have news for you: many, many more are coming.

 

[Yokai]

Kind of a mistake what you did, especially dealing with Portland cops, as they're rather more trigger-and-truncheon-happy than most. I would've left the area and got a cup of coffee rather than standing around trying to bother them. Truth is, cops will pretty much never back down or change their minds based on what you do, because they know they're armed and can do basically whatever they want, at least in the immediate situation.

As for me, my run-ins with the police have been pretty minor. The last time was when me and a few friends had jumped a fence to go swimming in an outdoor pool in the middle of the night. A police car rolled up after an hour or so and they told us to clear out, and we figured well, yeah, we're technically trespassing here, so we got our stuff and left. They weren't rude or obstructive, they didn't try to search us, they just told us to clean up the beer bottles and go home.

Funnily enough, one of my friends asked them why they were being so casual about it, and they said that their patrol basically consisted of driving by this pool twice a night and removing the drunk twentysomethings. They were surprisingly good-natured about the whole thing and said that if they actually bothered to arrest or fine everyone they kicked out of the pool they'd be buried in paperwork forever. All in all, it was probably the most pleasant experience one could have with police officers as the opposition. Although I have a feeling these guys were the exception to the rule--I also live in Portland, where cops are charged with road rage and people have been forcibly searched at gunpoint on the basis of carrying a large backpack while African-American.

 

[maxmanrules]

Yesterday I come strolling home from a long day of dealing with over 500 kids jacked up on Halloween candy to find my street being blocked off by my local police dept. What happened apparently while attempting to serve a warrant for arrest the man they were looking for decided to hide in the attic, because that worked so well for Anne Frank, and because the police did not know if he was armed or not they decided to play it "safe".

Now the reason I critique is because while blocking off car traffic, presumably to clear the road for doughnut runs, they didn't stop foot traffic. For my safety they wouldn't let me enter my house because the house on the other side of my neighbors duplex is where the suspect was hiding out. I attempted to explain, rather loudly I'll admit, that if the suspect is armed it is most likely a handgun loaded with hollow point rounds and that being the case I would be perfectly safe in my home where there is a whole house between the perps place and my own instead of sitting on the side walk across the street where all there is is a single wall to protect all of us neighbors lined up waiting. After that tirade they made sit down on the side walk across the street from my house and in protest I immediately took to smart-assed comments to vocalize my take on the situation.

I believe the entire police force was on hand for this, well over 40 uniformed cops and an entire swat team of 19 wearing military issue combat armor armed with AR-15s, as well as at least 9 other cops and 3 negotiators in plain cloths, who had put on vests. This stand off had apparently been going on since 3:30 and when I arrived at 4:30 cops were still arriving. So I said the first thing that came to mind.

"There must have been a line at Voodoo Doughnuts. Can you guys give me a bacon maple bar? All my snacks are inside my place."

After awhile I realized I had my iPad with me so I started watching movies, as loudly as it would go. This prompted more than a few upset stairs from the guy standing around doing nothing so I said "I could be inside being quiet" after a while "just tear gas his ass I'm cold", later "if you need a flash bang I've got potassium chloride, aluminum powder, and magnesium flakes in my garage"

I made many more comments during the event, got some laughs from the onlookers. Regardless, when the whole thing was over, (the guy gave up, and came down), the SWAT negotiator came walking out (before the perp) and I said "What they didn't have a jelly filled for you, well make sure to pick up a bacon maple bar for me on your way back."

The negotiator quietly got in his car and turned it around but before leaving made a point of stopping next to me pointing and saying "Thanks for your help today" to which I replied "What help?" he responded "Exactly." To that I said "How about next time we do this at your place and you can wait for nothing to happen on a curb for three hours in the cold. You want help, try a stationary bike, it's probably easier on your fat ass than a treadmill"

Then he left and I was free to enter my home.

This isn't my first run in with the cops, certainly the longest, getting searched usually only takes a few minutes after all (as a white male with a buzzed head I very often "match the description"); but every run in with them I've ever had I've been a disrespectful asshole.

Now I ask you fellow escapists, how do you deal with "authority" figures, namely the police. Do you wait patently and hope for the best, do you gawk and take pictures, or do you inundate them with sarcasm and smart-assery?

I also have to say when I heard Gram mention a guy in his attic in Oregon on Feed Dump I almost thought he was talking about this incident for a second.

They're cops. Their main job at that point is to make sure NO ONE DIES.
They really don't give a fuck whether you're cold so long as there isn't a rampaging criminal on the loose.
Cops get too much shit from fuckwits like you when they have a stressful job that is generally for the good of the community. Perhaps a thanks for stopping a madman with a gun from running DOWN YOUR STREET might be handy?
In any case, YOU owe them the damn doughnuts

 

[Legit101]

................

 

[Wekub]

Being an arse would help neither them nor me, so I'd avoid that. :|
Jesus.
I'd try to explain my way back into my home in that situation, but I wouldn't go past that and dive into arseness.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Now I ask you fellow escapists, how do you deal with "authority" figures, namely the police.

After reading this: http://minimumcover.wordpress.com/2011/09/16/and-then-there-was-silence/ : I give them every piece of help I can.

And so should you.

Perhaps one or two people will read this who have, in the past, thrown their hands in the air in disgust when presented by six cones and a yellow jacket. Perhaps they will consider that, just possibly, there might be another Dave down the road, and that the officer stood before them may well have just stared into the helpless eyes of the dying or the dead. Just drive on and work out a new way to get home from a layby down the road. It?s not that much of an inconvenience really?is it?

 

[The Human Torch]

I call bullshit. Stop trying to make yourself look like an anti-hero.

 

[chadachada123]

-snip-

Let's assume they let you in your house, for whatever reason. What if the guy hiding in the attic manages to escape it, and find your house, maybe because you left your light on, maybe because he felt like it, unimportant details, and he decides to take you hostage. This scenario, unlikely as it might be, is still a concern for the Police Department, they have to make sure there isn't even the possibility of collateral damage.

For them, it was safer that you'd be sitting on the street, with them, so they could protect you more easily.

And, TBH, you being an ass doesn't help anyone, I understand that your day might have been long and hard and very tiresome, but that's no excuse to being annoying to other people who are also doing their long, hard and very tiresome work.

Making comments aloud isn't going to make work any harder for the 30 cops standing around outside...If I'm being forced to comply with stupid rules, I'm going to voice my opinion about them.

Besides, if the other houses weren't evacuated, but merely denied re-entry, your hypothetical situation is completely moot.

Are you sure? Have you ever tried to do YOUR JOB while some asshole made running commentary meant to either insult or distract you? What if you were running your mouth and the cop(s) missed a quiet but VERY IMPORTANT NOISE, like that of a gun being cocked, or orders being issued. I smoke pot and frequently break other minor laws, but if I was a cop that day, then BY GOD I would have arrested your punk ass for obstruction. Even if the charges didnt stick and I got a repremand for it, at the very least you would have been less of a distraction inside a squad car or back at the station.

Wow. I'm literally laughing aloud at the idea that you could hear a gun being cocked from outside, on the street, while around 30 fellow officers. You're also ignoring that there were actual officers inside the building in question. The officers outside were literally standing around, doing nothing but wasting tax-dollars.

 

[Creator002]

I treat the police as I do any other person. I'm polite as long as they are. I understand why you were frustrated by not being able to get to your house, but I think you were too quick to start being smart-ass.

 

[newwiseman]

Was he being a tool? yes but answer me this is somebody can. Was there any reason to keep people from there homes if said crim was already located.

They said they thought he might have a weapon. Distance isn't everything, what were the sightlines from where the guy was hiding to the various houses?

I dont buy your story at all. If you were actually mouthing off to a cop especially in a situation like that you would have been taken down and arrested. With that many cops they would not ignore you breaking the law.

No laws broken I can legally sit where they say it's "safe" and ask them if they're going to go get doughnuts to bring me one.

You are being a serious distraction in a life threatening situation. I wouldn't be so sure they couldn't have charged you with something if they wanted.

And of course, as I said earlier, you telling them you had dangerous chemicals in your house, potentially for building weapons, was asking for a search of your house.

Perfect line of sight to where we were on the street, there was a whole duplex in the way of seeing that place from my own. It turns out they just wanted to use my parking space with out me "interfering" in police activity... Strange that the first thing smart assed I said was I could be quiet inside. And, while everyone is standing around doing nothing, waiting on the negotiator to get his ass there, an Assault in downtown Eugene got called in without police response... my tax dollars at work.

As for "dangerous" chemicals, not really. I keep a stock of aluminum, Iron Oxide, Potassium Chloride, sulfur, Ethanol, Lithium Chloride, Strontium chloride, Zinc, Calcium chloride, Sodium chloride, copper sulfate, copper chloride, magnesium, potassium sulfate, and potassium nitrate. I actually have a stockpile of most of the elements from the periodic table, too bad I cant afford a gallon jug of the precious metals. There really only dangerous if you know how to mix for a reaction, although the iron oxide is pretty damn flammable on its own.

As for what I do with it, chemistry duh. Though if you must know I have a BAFT license to make any 'explosive' I want up to one pound, hobbyist fireworks. As a requirement I have to pay them to inspect my work space once every couple of years. Because I don't have a suitable on site cache I can't keep anything that will actually explode without being mixed up on hand, and most of my fun is usually kept to around 1 ounce. Chemistry is one of the most fun and cheapest things you can do, most of what I work with is sold for less than 5$ a pound in town, and you can get it for less from chemistry suppliers online. I was told at my last inspection I don't even need the license anymore for what I'm doing.

The Railgun I built is probably the most dangerous thing in my home, when it's on, but only because the capacitor bank isn't shielded and can arc if your too close to it without discharging. I only got to do a full charge fire once, I had to rent the gun range for the day, they allow black powder guns there and this thing could set those off just charging up. It was underwhelming, only 700 feet per second, I want at least twice that, and the charge welded one of the steel ball barrings into the barrel.

I thought about trying out fusion for a while but I don't have the room for it, it's expensive, and I know I'm too lazy to properly shield a project like that.

 

[newwiseman]

It turns out they just wanted to use my parking space with out me "interfering" in police activity

That sounds like reason enough to me.

They should had said that when I first showed up instead of "For your own safety your not going to be able to enter your home tonight."

But then I wouldn't have just backed up to the curb, I would have demanded they either arrest me or get the out of my way. I've already filed my complaint.

 

[TheTim]

I understand you're reasoning for being upset, if it was me though, i probably would have just dealt with it silently, as i can't be a very vocally disrespectful person

i do find your comments amusing and clever though

 

[xXGeckoXx]

I don't really think what you've done is something to be proud of. Your response to a potentially fatal standoff is to whine about how you can't get into your house and then make things difficult for the people trying to resolve the situation?

You have more in common with the kids jacked up on candy than you'd probably like to think. Entitled, spoiled, petty, possessed of horribly skewed priorities, and just plain unpleasant.

Just go do something else for a while. 3 hours out of the house isn't going to hurt you.

I agree mcmullen.

I am a jackass to those who are jackasses to me but a guy holed up in a building with a gun is serious shit for police. If a guy goes in and the perp panics and shoots him would you prefer that. If the area was not secured and the perp got away or freaked out and started shooting would you like that better huh?

When the guy behind the desk at the gugenheim told me that I had to buy a ticket even though the museum was half closed to use the toilets I was an ass back but you are luck the police did not charge you with obstructing them.

-snip-

Let's assume they let you in your house, for whatever reason. What if the guy hiding in the attic manages to escape it, and find your house, maybe because you left your light on, maybe because he felt like it, unimportant details, and he decides to take you hostage. This scenario, unlikely as it might be, is still a concern for the Police Department, they have to make sure there isn't even the possibility of collateral damage.

For them, it was safer that you'd be sitting on the street, with them, so they could protect you more easily.

And, TBH, you being an ass doesn't help anyone, I understand that your day might have been long and hard and very tiresome, but that's no excuse to being annoying to other people who are also doing their long, hard and very tiresome work.

Making comments aloud isn't going to make work any harder for the 30 cops standing around outside...If I'm being forced to comply with stupid rules, I'm going to voice my opinion about them.

Besides, if the other houses weren't evacuated, but merely denied re-entry, your hypothetical situation is completely moot.

Are you sure? Have you ever tried to do YOUR JOB while some asshole made running commentary meant to either insult or distract you? What if you were running your mouth and the cop(s) missed a quiet but VERY IMPORTANT NOISE, like that of a gun being cocked, or orders being issued. I smoke pot and frequently break other minor laws, but if I was a cop that day, then BY GOD I would have arrested your punk ass for obstruction. Even if the charges didnt stick and I got a repremand for it, at the very least you would have been less of a distraction inside a squad car or back at the station.

Wow. I'm literally laughing aloud at the idea that you could hear a gun being cocked from outside, on the street, while around 30 fellow officers. You're also ignoring that there were actual officers inside the building in question. The officers outside were literally standing around, doing nothing but wasting tax-dollars.

Fine, it has become obvious that you are not going to allow yourself to be knocked off your pedastal of self-righteous indignation. The thing is the cops are hired to have the authority that they were using on the scene. You were not. Unless the cops were exercising a GROSS abuse of their power, which they were not, then it didnt matter what YOU thought was right or wrong. They had the authority, you did not, they had training and policy to follow in this specific situation, YOU DID NOT.

I advise you to be more careful about your rush to judgement in these situations. Karma could very well have you ignoring a police evacuation, only to have you succumb to a toxic gas cloud, or what have you, because you have stubbornly decided that you alone know better and you will damned well do what you want.

Once again I agree. I would also like to ask the OP just how well he personally knows what it is like to be an officer in a situation with a dangerous person. I would rather play it safe 1000 times than make one slip, police know that you can never judge people and that it only takes one bullet to cause serious harm.

 

[Laser Priest]

When I have to deal with authority, I do it by not treating them like scum.

You seem to be unfamiliar with the concept of treating others decently, but at least consider trying it sometime.

 

[Benny Blanco]

OP, I live in the UK, where a lot of cops still don't have guns (although in London it's got a lot more common) and believe me when I say that antagonising the police is rarely a good idea.

I too am white, and have close-cropped hair, indicators which coupled with my build and tendency to wear sports clothing (to and from the gym/ training venue) mean that I fit a certain profile.

If I started mouthing off to our (famously polite and reasonable on a world law enforcement continuum) cops I might find myself mysteriously injured faster than you can say "fell down the stairs and banged his head on a radiator". Cops back each other up so you can be sure any CCTV would probably disappear. This is in London. In the US the police have more draconian powers and in the case of the SWAT teams they have fucking M4 rifles. One accidental discharge and your smart mouth is a pink mist, know what I mean? Even if they don't beat or kill you, they might decide to give you a cavity search, something which only a doctor can do here but which US cops reserve for particularly mouthy guys they don't like.

What's that? You weren't breaking the law? I beg to differ. If you drive there's a reasonably good chance a cop can find some reason your car is breaking the law and fine you for it. If you have the misfortune to live in an area which has asset forfeiture laws, they could take your car or even your house on the suspicion of criminal (especially drug-related) activity inside and more often than not the burden of proof is on you, not the local PD.

Even if none of the above apply, why do you have to be a dick to guys who routinely put themselves in the way of danger for a pretty meager paycheck? Even if you don't like them for whatever reason, isn't it better to keep a low profile? Or even to be nice?

I always give the police my best "law-abiding middle-class white-boy" shtick ("Good evening sir! Yes officer! No sir! I'm sorry officer! Won't happen again officer!") and I've never even had an official warning so far. (although in fairness I'm not exactly a menace to society) Treat people reasonably and they usually do the same. Sometimes cops get a bit boisterous but just act respectful (whether you are or not) and it usually placates the more power-mad ones.

 

[IamSofaKingRaw]

You're the f'n man. I would have stuck around just to hear that in person lol