Spoiler! Or is it?

[Zantos]

I used to go out with a girl who I'm pretty sure was physically incapable of not mentioning spoilers. Any twist in any story would be retold and many films were rendered not worth it by this new information.

So I decided my way to get back at her was to spoil her back on any films, TV shows or games I got first. Then it occurred to me that she wouldn't know if I was telling the truth, I CAN LIE! Anything, from anywhere on the believability spectrum was available to me.

So hit me with some spoilers! Not actual spoilers, unless the spoiler is so batshit that you can't make up anything weirder. How will we know? It's not a spoiler if you've seen it.

One of my favourites was that Soap McTavish, beaten, bloodied and unarmed at the hands of Makarov sometime during MW2, discovers at the last moment that he's a wizard. An epic battle ensues, but can he really kill his own father???

 

[lRookiel]

That sounds like the next Call of duty title there.


Call of duty: MAGIC WARFARE! :3

 

[The Salty Vulcan]

The ending of the Santa Claus movie with the Big Lebowski?
Turns out its all an hallucination as Claus and his wife die in the blizzard, never seen again.

 

[Thaluikhain]

At the end, you find out it's all a dream, but when you get out of bed, you walk past that object that guy keep playing with.

The annoying boss of your group turns out to be evil and you're on the wrong side.

...

Actually, there's a number of more specific spoilers that sound very strange out of context.

 

[Valanthe]

Call of duty: MAGIC WARFARE! :3

I would buy that, they would be -forced- to at least change up the mechanics enough to make it worth buying. And you know what, it might even be fun. The multiplayer of CoD is fun, it just never changes.

The ultimate spoiler: John is a demon, and he becomes a zombie.

 

[lRookiel]

Call of duty: MAGIC WARFARE! :3

I would buy that, they would be -forced- to at least change up the mechanics enough to make it worth buying. And you know what, it might even be fun. The multiplayer of CoD is fun, it just never changes.

The ultimate spoiler: John is a demon, and he becomes a zombie.

I'll pitch the idea to Activision immediately, if they accept, I get rich, if they don't, then I kill them, and no more reskins of modern warfare shooters coming from them.

It's a win win situation really.... :3

 

[lRookiel]

My ultimate spoiler: The good guy wins, and then becomes evil. Oh wait that actually happens in some games...

Ok take 2: The good guy wins, then cookies for all and then he kills the damsel in distress through sheer cookie related hyper excitement.

 

[Zantos]

Call of duty: MAGIC WARFARE! :3

I would buy that, they would be -forced- to at least change up the mechanics enough to make it worth buying. And you know what, it might even be fun. The multiplayer of CoD is fun, it just never changes.

The ultimate spoiler: John is a demon, and he becomes a zombie.

I'll pitch the idea to Activision immediately, if they accept, I get rich, if they don't, then I kill them, and no more reskins of modern warfare shooters coming from them.

It's a win win situation really.... :3

Want, game, want, now... If they don't want it, I'll go pitch to EA. They won't take it, but it gives me an excuse to set an EA representative on fire. Even if they do want it as a Battlefield 3 expansion (Back to Hogwarts), I really want to immolate someone from their marketing department.

EDIT: Also, the alien's weakness, turns out it's bullets.

 

[lRookiel]

Call of duty: MAGIC WARFARE! :3

I would buy that, they would be -forced- to at least change up the mechanics enough to make it worth buying. And you know what, it might even be fun. The multiplayer of CoD is fun, it just never changes.

The ultimate spoiler: John is a demon, and he becomes a zombie.

I'll pitch the idea to Activision immediately, if they accept, I get rich, if they don't, then I kill them, and no more reskins of modern warfare shooters coming from them.

It's a win win situation really.... :3

Want, game, want, now... If they don't want it, I'll go pitch to EA. They won't take it, but it gives me an excuse to set an EA representative on fire. Even if they do want it as a Battlefield 3 expansion (Back to Hogwarts), I really want to immolate someone from their marketing department.

And then I shall name you an honorary hero of the Escapist.

 

[Hero in a half shell]

I enjoyed that Jean Claude Van Damme movie where he was trying to save his new-born baby after Mickey Rourke stole it, and they ended up half naked wrestling in a minefield in a Spanish bullring, Rourke had a wild tiger released into the place to liven it up and there was a black man driving about on a motorcycle.

You will never know how much I embellished that ending unless you've seen the movie.

 

[Zantos]

I enjoyed that Jean Claude Van Damme movie where he was trying to save his new-born baby after Mickey Rourke stole it, and they ended up half naked wrestling in a minefield in a Spanish bullring, Rourke had a wild tiger released into the place to liven it up and there was a black man driving about on a motorcycle.

You will never know how much I embellished that ending unless you've seen the movie.

I feel disgusted with myself to know that there is a film starring Jean Claude Van Damme and Mickey Rourke and I didn't know about it. This will have to be rectified.

 

[DoPo]

The multiplayer of CoD is fun, it just never changes.

War, war never changes.

OT: The protagonist is a hippie that tries to explain to everybody that we could live in a better world if we stopped being dicks to one another. And is killed for that.

Turns out the bad guy who wanted to stop you all along and finally killed you was not only good to begin with, but it was you. You just relived the memories of the evil guy and saw the whole situation through his eyes. As he stole your real body and trapped your consciousness in his.

The dull monotonous life with the same house, the same people, and the same activities over and over again was a lie. Just an experiment. The aliens that attacked Earth a long time ago were supreme in shapeshifting and mimicking others but tended to get lost in it. The military closed them in a test environment with another human to study them.

Shepard defeats the Reapers and saves the universe, only to realise the Reapers did their whole harvesting the lives of the universe to stop a different race - more ancient than them, of doing it. Those elder monstrosities, however require a much larger galactic population to feed them - that's why the Reapers were forced to periodically cull the Galaxy and acquire power with which to oppose their own end. Now either the Council should do the same thing as the Reapers or perish.

 

[Hero in a half shell]

I enjoyed that Jean Claude Van Damme movie where he was trying to save his new-born baby after Mickey Rourke stole it, and they ended up half naked wrestling in a minefield in a Spanish bullring, Rourke had a wild tiger released into the place to liven it up and there was a black man driving about on a motorcycle.

You will never know how much I embellished that ending unless you've seen the movie.

I feel disgusted with myself to know that there is a film starring Jean Claude Van Damme and Mickey Rourke and I didn't know about it. This will have to be rectified.

It's called Double Team, and it will change your life forever!

 

[TheRealJLars]

Here's one:

His father was dead the whole time, and upon finding this out, Frodo retaliated by joining the forces of Khan and Muhammad Ali and launched a full scale galactic war against his Emperor Palpatine, who was actually him from the future, only before realizing that this was all the hallucinations of the people he lost fighting fires after relapsing into alcoholism post 9-11.

Consider yourself spoiled.

 

[theheroofaction]

At the end of inception, it is discovered that they are still in a dream but also that the dream was in the matrix, which is itself in a simulation from within the grid, which is running on a minecraft computer. which is of course, run on a regular computer, which exists in a world made entirely of magic illusions which is in a universe that is actually holodeck setting, after a thousaand such cycles, they finally determine what they think is the "top," only to find that that is in fact an illusion which is housed in the dream they spent most of the movie in.

They then write a book about it, entitled "circular fictionality," and then it gets made into a movie called inception.

It's the ultimate mindscrew

Holy shit, I just made inception even more confusing than it already is.

 

[Mike Richards]

Bruce Willis was actually the kid grown up, and his ghost went back in time to warm him about how he dies. This then inspires him to go into psychiatry and eventually gets him killed.

 

[The Night Shade]

The ending of the Santa Claus movie with the Big Lebowski?
Turns out its all an hallucination as Claus and his wife die in the blizzard, never seen again.

you have been watching the Nostalgia critic haven't you? Santa christ approves

Darth Vader-Luke you are my nephew
Luke- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

[isometry]

This reminds me of a false spoiler I had once, it was worse than a real spoiler because I kept waiting for it to happen and it never did. Can't remember what the game was though.

 

[Rickolas Walrus]

John dies at the end. You could use that for any series with a really like able main character and just change the name

It's also a pretty good book now that I think about it

 

[Bara_no_Hime]

My ultimate spoiler: The good guy wins, and then becomes evil.

Oh my, spoilers for every Dune novel ever written (at least the ones by Frank - haven't read the ones by his son yet).