Swallowing your pride

[Saskwach]

This post [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.147504?page=4#3400558] set me to thinking. You see, this is a big issue for me, and I think that whether we think much about it or not, it's a big issue for all of us. When you made a mistake, or acted like a doorknob, or just in some way made a fool of yourself, have you had the courage to swallow your pride and man (or woman) up to the person in question? If not, why not? How do you usually do it? Have you learned any lasting lesson from the process?
My opinion on the issue is that this is if not the test of character then certainly in the top three. Everyone makes mistakes. With that as a given, the only thing separating you from me is whether we can accept that and make amends. Proceeding from this principle, I find apologies one of the hardest but most rewarding things to do in life. Apologising is admitting to a vice, but at the same time revealing a virtue.

 

[EchetusXe]

Yeah, I genuinely apologized to a friend a couple of months ago. It was good because it put the issue to rest. I could have tried to deny doing anything wrong and said 'it wasnt that bad' or 'your making a big deal out of nothing'. But no, I was in the wrong and he had the perfect right to be offended, so I apologized.

Logically it was the right decision to apologize. It would have been another mistake of mine to deny making a mistake and apologizing for it in the first place.

 

[Disaster Button]

I've never really thought of it as an issue for me until the last few months. I always thought I admitted when I was wrong (in most cases) and things like that.

But in the last few months I've come to the realisation that I apparently don't always conceed and can be quite stubborn, this isn't exactly NEEWSSSS but it is News in the sense that I'm actually worse than I thought.

So to answer your question I have issues swallowing my pride more than I realise and I am trying to get better at it.

Although.. because it's only been 1 person who told me this it's got me thinkign whether it's just their perception. In short everyone will ahve different deffinitions on whether you are good at swallowing your pride and manning up.

But it is always a VERY good thing to know when to step back and realise when you're pressing your point or whether you're jsut being a jerk..

I do find it quite hard to apologise and 100% mean it, which is another thing I'm working on.

 

[goatzilla8463]

HELL NO!

My ego is bigger than the sun.

It simply won't allow me to apologise or admit I'm wrong.

 

[The_ModeRazor]

Yeah.
But to hear me apologize is rather rare, because although I can be very offending, I'm almost always right about the issue. (from a logic point of view)
There goes me ego. Sorry for that.
Damn, I just apologized.
...
You're good.

 

[Optimus Hagrid]

I do actually, I can see a flame war coming from a mile off, and I really don't want to get involved in one.

Okay, maybe not ALL the time.

(do you see what I did thar)

 

[Katherine Kerensky]

If I am in the wrong, I will apologize with the utmost sincerity.
and I have done so in the past.
If I didn't I'd be like The "Bull In A China Shop".

 

[HentMas]

"I am deeply sorry for the things i have said and done in the past that may have caused you troubles, i was unaware of the truth but now i understand that you are right and i am wrong"

my friends always laugh after i say things like that, but they understand i am serious and i mean it, so yeah, i am a proud person and i proudly know i can be wrong

 

[Durahan2]

I'll apologize when I know I'm in the wrong, but being in my wrong is very...rare.
People tend to take what I say too far, or don't fully read my posts or doesn't fully listen to what I say. I won't apologize for people acting stupid, and on-lookers tend to pin me as the bad guy, when the idiot who misunderstood me is in the wrong.

I'm a jokester at heart, and 95% of whatever I say is ment for parody. I will say anything for a chuckle, that includes racial slurs. But like I said before I won't apologize for people taking what I say too far. I think being PC has totally brainwashed some people.

 

[CIA]

I try to accept that I may be wrong, but it is very hard. I'm programmed to think I'm correct. It is an issue I'm trying to address.

 

[Labyrinth]

I try to accept that I may be wrong, but it is very hard. I'm programmed to think I'm correct. It is an issue I'm trying to address.

I'm a lot like this actually. Or I was for a long time. It took a bit for me to realise that the mistakes I make aren't as catastrophic as I make them out to be because I am still human and not all that important, really. Used to be a particular point of narcissism that I thought everyone would a) be hugely offended by and b) really care that much about the stuff-ups I've made. The larger ones are more difficult to swallow.

I apologise, rectify what I can and move on. Some still kick at the back of my mind going "How the fuck could you be that damn stupid?" Especially when it comes to people prodding holes in my stats and such while I'm trying to make an argument.

No-one likes to be proved wrong because that admits a weakness. We're not allowed weaknesses. Unfortunately.

 

[NeutralDrow]

I have a mixed record on the matter. About half the time, if I realize I'm wrong on something, I'll simply stop responding...until I realized that this is almost worse than continuing an argument.

I'd say I'm proud of myself for the other (increasing) half, but that would negate any point in swallowing my pride and admitting I was wrong.

 

[ae86gamer]

If I'm wrong then I'll admit it and usually apologize. It was harder to do when I was younger, because my pride often times got in the way, but as I'm getting older I'm trying to own up to my mistakes.

 

[Labyrinth]

I have a mixed record on the matter. About half the time, if I realize I'm wrong on something, I'll simply stop responding...until I realized that this is almost worse than continuing an argument.

It's somewhat an instinctive reaction, like covering ones mouth after accidentally letting something slip.

 

[The Cheezy One]

This post [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.147504?page=4#3400558] set me to thinking. You see, this is a big issue for me, and I think that whether we think much about it or not, it's a big issue for all of us. When you made a mistake, or acted like a doorknob, or just in some way made a fool of yourself, have you had the courage to swallow your pride and man (or woman) up to the person in question? If not, why not? How do you usually do it? Have you learned any lasting lesson from the process?
My opinion on the issue is that this is if not the test of character then certainly in the top three. Everyone makes mistakes. With that as a given, the only thing separating you from me is whether we can accept that and make amends. Proceeding from this principle, I find apologies one of the hardest but most rewarding things to do in life. Apologising is admitting to a vice, but at the same time revealing a virtue.

you know whats bewst? when someone accepts that you have swallowed your pride
[HEADING=1]thank you for apologising all the times you have done so[/HEADING]
dont you feel better?

 

[Canadamus Prime]

I am more then willing to admit when I'm wrong. The key word there being "when".

 

[El Poncho]

I think people would admit to being wrong if the person who is right didn't laugh at them for it or keep mentioning it or things of the sorts.

 

[CIA]

I try to accept that I may be wrong, but it is very hard. I'm programmed to think I'm correct. It is an issue I'm trying to address.

I'm a lot like this actually. Or I was for a long time. It took a bit for me to realise that the mistakes I make aren't as catastrophic as I make them out to be because I am still human and not all that important, really. Used to be a particular point of narcissism that I thought everyone would a) be hugely offended by and b) really care that much about the stuff-ups I've made. The larger ones are more difficult to swallow.

I apologise, rectify what I can and move on. Some still kick at the back of my mind going "How the fuck could you be that damn stupid?" Especially when it comes to people prodding holes in my stats and such while I'm trying to make an argument.

No-one likes to be proved wrong because that admits a weakness. We're not allowed weaknesses. Unfortunately.

That is actually quite helpful. I just made some sort of major mistake, so its good to know its probably not nearly as bad as I think it is.

Or alternatively I'm looking for meaning in the wrong places.

 

[Rory]

If you make a mistake and insist that you didn't you're a bigger idiot then you'd ever be if you just admit it. Nobody is that perfect that they never make mistakes, and admitting you've made one and try to learn from it is a lot wiser than denying it.

I also don't think people should apologize for having a "wrong" opinion, even if they think the opinion is wrong.

 

[Labyrinth]

That is actually quite helpful. I just made some sort of major mistake, so its good to know its probably not nearly as bad as I think it is.

Or alternatively I'm looking for meaning in the wrong places.

It's like walking out with say, fly unzipped. You may think that everyone's watching you but the truth is they're too self-immersed to noticed anyway, just as you wouldn't really notice if they had a similar situation.