Lieju said:
It depends on where you live, even within a country. I grew up on a countryside, and if you go to places with strong religious influences it can be even worse.
During military service, I've had Laestadians call us city folk
rubbercocks, because real men apparently don't use contraception. Now, maybe I'm just naive, and I can laugh it off as wanton ignorance only because I don't have to deal with it on a daily basis. Maybe some people don't have the luxury of saying "fuck you!" and moving on with their life. That right there is a very hard concept for me to wrap my head around, because I
do have that luxury. Why doesn't everyone else?
Lieju said:
Don't you think, that if you're lucky enough to live in a place without this kind of BS going on, you'd have a valuable point of view to offer in these kinds of discussion?
As in, 'We let my little sister dress like she wants to and the world did not explode'?
In the case of The Escapist that would very much be preaching to the choir, as I feel it would be in my local community.
My granny on the other hand is way past redemption. There's no changing her mind at this point, but there's no need to. In 60 years she'll be dead, and my generation will have taken the place of hers. I'm sure the youth of 2070 will think our views are just as antiquated, but it's okay, because
they will then be the future trendsetters.
Anyway, the thing is this: I have never witnessed gender-based oppression firsthand. And I've looked. Sure I can google up all sorts of bullshittery, but I just can't see it being the norm and not the exception. Like school shooters. As in, not necessarily an underlying problem with society itself (unless we use a scale much smaller than the western civilization, or even a country), but just people with personal issues and hangups. For this I get told that I'm part of the problem, and that I couldn't possibly understand (and the latter just might be right).
In the end I'm left feeling antagonized and angry, because somehow I've turned into the villain of the story. I can't relate, and as such it's better for me to not engage at all. I realize that being a feminist on this site must be tough, what with the stream of opposition they get whenever they open their mouths, but you have to understand that when you call half the population victims, the implications of that
will alienate the other half. Anyone would defend themselves if they feel they've been unjustly accused of something offending their sensibilities.
For fuck's sake, I didn't mean to ramble on like that. I'm already feeling the anxiety... That's another reason I avoid these threads. Time to ditch this site for a week or two.