Tali'Zorah is 9 days old: An update and a story on fatherhood

[Daystar Clarion]

I'm not sure what bothers me more.

The prospect of a father knowingly using his child as a focus for seeking attention, or that you are completely unaware of any of the implications of your actions, despite the pages of people advising you against it.

Scary indeed.

Is this any different from the mothers who post EVERY TEN DAMN MINUTES D; on FB about their baby? Or the countless mother and baby blogs?

This would be suited better to a blog but it's always nice to hear about this when it happens to an Escapist member since we're supposed to be a community.
When you've decided on a name you like, why should strangers on the internet dictate what you name your child?

The man seems like a good father and that's all that concerns me. Like I said before, if Tali doesn't like her name she can go by something else. My mum decided when she was young to go by Mandy instead of her actual name.

Just let the man be happy.

And the last thread wasn't enough for that?

When you've decided on a name you like, why should strangers on the internet dictate what you name your child?

It becomes an issue when said parent asks people about said name, then decides to ignore all advice because he was never seeking it in the first place, only using it to garner attention, which sets off several alarm bells in my head.


Fulfilling a biological imperative doesn't make someone immune to criticism, if anything they deserve more, because it isn't just their life they're in control of anymore.

Man, Grumpstar is at full grump today XD

 

[Simple Bluff]

I already encountered the "apostrophe not working in the computer system" at the pediatrician, so they just dropped it and it's "Talizorah" on the paperwork there.

Wait, really? Why would an apostrophe cause an error in the system? Lots of names have apostrophes - well not in their first name, granted, but there's plenty of "O' Neils, O' Connors" etc. That's an awfully silly system.

Anyway, congratulations on the baby. I didn't look at the pictures but she sounds well. I can't say I like the name Tali'Zorah (Tali sounds really nice on its own though), but you've thought about it a hell of a lot more than I have, and it seems like you done it for the right reasons. You seem to be doing a pretty good job of looking after her, and that's always nice to see.

Thanks for sharing OP. Made my day a little brighter.

 

[Phrozenflame500]

Meh, what's done it done I suppose and if you feel like it'll work out you have to deal with whatever consequences.

I suppose it's likely people will just refer to her as "Tali" and assume it's something foreign, and honestly I've heard stranger names. Good luck.

 

[Auron225]

Well we're hardly gonna talk you out of naming her that now. I still think the best option would have been making her first name Tali and her middle name Zorah, with no apostrophe at all. There's not much point diving back into that now though. I get the feeling you'll be a great father in any case (given how selfless you say you're becoming). Hopefully you'll know how best to handle any cases of bullying if they appear in the future.

She's cute btw

 

[CloudAtlas]

Well, I still don't think it was a good idea, but the deed is done, so all the best to you and your child.

 

[Bertylicious]

I always find people who take on parental responsibility hugely impressive. I mean; children define themselves by their parents/people who raise them. I'd be worried that it would become an excercise in grotesque self parody and heart-rending dissapointment.

I already encountered the "apostrophe not working in the computer system" at the pediatrician, so they just dropped it and it's "Talizorah" on the paperwork there.

Wait, really? Why would an apostrophe cause an error in the system? Lots of names have apostrophes - well not in their first name, granted, but there's plenty of "O' Neils, O' Connors" etc. That's an awfully silly system.

Anyway, congratulations on the baby. I didn't look at the pictures but she sounds well. I can't say I like the name Tali'Zorah (Tali sounds really nice on its own though), but you've thought about it a hell of a lot more than I have, and it seems like you done it for the right reasons. You seem to be doing a pretty good job of looking after her, and that's always nice to see.

Thanks for sharing OP. Made my day a little brighter.

Man, fuck apostrophes in names. Some systems/people will include the apostrophe, others will only accept letters, some will not include the space, others will capitalise the bit that comes after the O...

Don't even get me started on hyphenated names.

If I had my way people wouldn't have names, they'd just have a unique serial number.

 

[keiji_Maeda]

Gawrsh, this? Really?

I came in here ready to fairly critical of the name choice. But on these puny vindictive grounds?

never.

I don't know if some of the people actually involved in this discussion are aware of the fact. But Tali is actually a Hebrew name, i have a friend named it, and as a matter of fact, a hells kitchen (or summat) participant was named it a few years ago. google it, if you doubt the veracity or intent of my claim. I'm fine with if you don't believe it. But it is a name.

The intent and choice might be different, but as a bunch of all' y'all I'm pretty familiar with bullying, and actually working with kids as an adult. And I'll tell ya' straight off, the lil' hellraiser will bully ANYONE over ANYTHING. i helped out at a rec cent. where the kids bullied a guy for being to into sports and actually having five Extra-cued activities.As mentioned, kids can be vicious.

Where i'm from there are a lot of "new" names, and as far as my profession goes i am told by more senior colleagues that the "naming" goes in waves. One generation wants solid "legit" names, and the next "original and their own" names. And yes, i think some names are a tad silly, like "Jonah legolas" or charles-vigg. But who am i to judge their own intent to name their kids, the kids could be A LOT Worse off than having (at worst) a pretentious parent who wants an original name and puts some search and desire into it.

 

[keiji_Maeda]

snap

Well, i might be a tad impetous here. But i'm assuming you weren't aware that this would happen when you had offspring? You as a person is going to get a bit sidelined,you desires, wants, needs, are gonna be put on the side for a bit. And the "kid" prioritized.

Then again, with no kids on my own, who am i to tell you what to expect.

Anyways, 'gratz and good fer 'cha with the no-smoke. Try to quit as fast as possible. It does guarantee more years with your kid and family.

 

[keiji_Maeda]

Ah yes, I heard about this! You're the actual person who named your daughter after a videogame alien famous for being romanceable?

You seem as if you're in good faith. As if, you're really not capable of understanding what a bad idea it is to brand a human being after your own little hobby.

As long as you're just blissfully unaware of the implications in what you've done, and you're not actually doing it just for your week of internet fame, eh. Sometimes people give bad names to their children.

But I swear if you were doing all of this just to get people to talk about you, already exploiting your own child for some cheap popularity....

....well, I hope not. I hope I'm only jaded and cynical.

I don't think he's doing it for fame. But I do agree that he, and seems like everyone else who has commented to far really just can't see the stupidity behind this, or the consequences it could bring for the child.

All that enthusiasm about his daughter clearly shows he loves her. Which makes me think he definitely doesn't understand what's wrong with the name.

Heck, I can imagine the logic of these parents was "I love my daughter, so I'm going to name her after something I love which also has a nice sound to it!".

However, a cynical interpretation could be: "I am not going to respect my daughter's identity and I'll brand her after MY hobbies because she is going to be like -I- want her to be. Furthermore, I think a videogame romance character is as important as my daughter. Added bonus: everyone on the internet is going to talk about me!!".

And that would be so very sad that I hope the parents didn't mean that, but are just really naive.

I read this, an had to re-read it. It is a fairly interesting summary of almost every naming ever.

Most people name their kids after their expectations on them. Or a saint (christian names on a whole) or to respect a family member that has passed before us. or to show respect to something/one that we have a passion for. I'm going to have to agree to disagree though. The naming might be a cry for attention, which would be a desperate individual devoid of any shame attempting to gain fame through their kid. Which, yes, wouldn't surprise me. As you often see people using their kids to propagate a selfish agenda.

Now the thing is, he named her after a special interest in his life? Sure. Why not, Video games obviously helped define who he is and is a part of the composite that makes up his personality. And as a such has given him a repository of fiction from which to draw inspiration.Isn't that true for many people? should we diminish from this assumption because it isn't from a book? Or a movie? or a sport? (you'd be surprised how many name their kids after high accomplishing athletes)But from a videogame? Ah 'spose it might come down to how we define the source itself.

If you find that Tali'zorah is a character drawn to rise from a young hunted girl from a looked down on species of aliens, struggling to find her way in the world, prove her worth, find her place and in that journey grow as a person that accomplishes greatness. then why not name your kid like this?

if you think that Tali'zorah is a empty caricature with the sole intent of offering a cute wrench-wench vulnerable chick that is only there to be romanced in a vapid game. Then you shouldn't.

Depends on how you view the medium. But as i wrote earlier, i think that arguments related to protecting the child from bullying are a fairly tepid one. As kids will always bully kids. And Tali is a name of some repute (albeit not necessarily for young ladies)

 

[Ravesy]

Gawrsh, this? Really?

I came in here ready to fairly critical of the name choice. But on these puny vindictive grounds?

never.

I don't know if some of the people actually involved in this discussion are aware of the fact. But Tali is actually a Hebrew name, i have a friend named it, and as a matter of fact, a hells kitchen (or summat) participant was named it a few years ago. google it, if you doubt the veracity or intent of my claim. I'm fine with if you don't believe it. But it is a name.

Pretty much my opinion too.

I mean don't get me wrong, naming a kid after a video character isn't exactly the best idea in the world, but the panic people are having about bullying is a little over the top.

Tali is a perfectly acceptable name, which its probably going to be shortened to 99% of the time, and its going to be over a decade before she gets into high school, by which time im pretty sure these kids wont even know what mass effect is, let alone make the link to a particular character in it.


PS. Cute kid .

 

[Guffe]

Congratulations!
You seem to be taking this fatherhood thing the right way.
The way you wrote this opening post shows she will have a very caring father.
I wish you best of luck in this new chapter of your life!

 

[purf]

Name? What name?
Congratulations!

And, man, here's the thing, believe it or not: It gets even better!

 

[AldUK]

Congratulations on becoming a dad. Now that's out of the way, you've made a massive mistake. This whole thing just comes across as selfish to me. You're not thinking of your daughter's future well-being, you're just appeasing your own hobbies through her, which is... kinda despicable.

I just hope she doesn't grow up to resent you over this. Good luck.

 

[Ulquiorra4sama]

Congratulations, man. I'm happy to say it sounds like you're really taking the new position very seriously, and i must admit the things you listed there are some of the reasons's i'm NOT ready to be a dad yet

As for the name; i'm glad to see you went through with it. I have more faith in humans than to assume your daughter will be shunned at every turn for having an unusual name or mocked by the few people who're gonna notice the reference. I wish you and your daughter all the best in the future.

 

[Raikas]

Cute kid, congrats!

I already encountered the "apostrophe not working in the computer system" at the pediatrician, so they just dropped it and it's "Talizorah" on the paperwork there.

Wait, really? Why would an apostrophe cause an error in the system? Lots of names have apostrophes - well not in their first name, granted, but there's plenty of "O' Neils, O' Connors" etc. That's an awfully silly system.

It's very common incompatibility though. I (and several other people) mentioned it in the OP's original thread - I have a hyphen in my first name (a not uncommon French name, and I live in Canada, so it's not unexpected) and I married into a family where about half the people have an apostrophe in their last name (d'Souza, so again, a not uncommon name) and both things are regularly a pain across a variety of systems.

 

[Eldritch Warlord]

1. He didn't pick the name. His wife did.
2. His wife never played Mass Effect.
3. His wife heard the name while he was playing Mass Effect and simply liked the sound of it unrelated to who the character actually was.

DrunkOnEstus probably should have told his wife that Zorah is her surname, not part of her given name. Then they could have named their daughter Tali Zorah [surname] and all would be well. Though I don't really care that DrunkOnEstus gave his daughter a weird name (if I had a daughter I'd name her Anaximandria), it just seems stupid to giver her a name that's really two different names concatenated by an apostrophe.

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

I still think that just because you like how something sounds doesn't make it fit for a human being to live with it. I like Chewbacca. Would I name my kid Chewbacca McCoy? Anyway, the name's staying. She'll get used to it, change it, use the Tali part, whatever. Props on the responsible 9 day fatherhood update. I don't think I could pull a cold turkey on games just like that.

 

[Grimh]

It just so happens I was thinking about that thread today. Glad to hear the kid's doing well.

As for criticisms about your choice of name, there are worse "normal" names out there already, and kids'll be cruel no matter what you name her if she's the one to be picked out for that.
I was bullied and teased by some assholes and my name had nothing to do with it, and they could have easily used it5 as I share the name with a certain blankie weilding thumbsucking character in Peanuts (is that what it's called in english? It's that thing with snoopy in it). I mean the options for abuse there are great. Amateurs...
Sure people here do have some points but I don't think it's this life rupturing calamity some seem to paint it as.

All you can do really is to try and teach her to be confident and try to make sure she owns her name independently, and not as a person sharing it with that one character in that thing.

*EDIT*
And at least you didn't name her Dovahkiin to get free stuff.

 

[Callate]

Congratulations. Your daughter is adorable. And doubly congratulations on quitting smoking; good for you. You're going to want to be there for that little girl for as long as you possibly can.

 

[Sigmund Av Volsung]

Don't worry yourself man, I know what a bad father is, and you are nothing like that.

Best of luck to you, and to Tali!