That Dickhead Friend

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Booze Zombie

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MrShowerHead said:
Ugh, talk about Wall Of Text (I read it, though)

Anyway, yeah, those kinda friends can be annoying. I've had few of them myself. But to be honest, I've been similar person sometimes too. And sometimes you don't even see it yourself.

Thank God my friends then talked to me about it. So that's what you should try too. Talk to him.
We humans aren't constant, we will change attitudes and act differently around different people, that means that at some point in our lives, we're all going to be "dickheads" because we either consciously or subconsciously think that's how we should be acting at the time.
 

legion431

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Mar 14, 2010
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I read all of it, so I guess I've gained your respect.
No, most of my friends [or what I would consider friends] are genuinely nice people, if a little arrogant/ignorant. If one of my friends was like that, I would tell him not to mind fuck me anymore. If he continues I wouldn't consider him a friend anymore.
 

LawlessSquirrel

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I've certainly known people like that. I'm usually too patient and forgiving to do anything about it, but evidently the other people I used to hang with weren't, and eventually just told them to leave.

But then, with paranoia and all, I get concerned about turning into 'that guy' for other people without knowing it...
 

RobCoxxy

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MurderousToaster said:
snip, snippety snip
Tell me about it. So many people like this.
Also got the asshole who acts really sensitive around girls to win them over, whinging about his "girl problems" til one feels sorry for him, gets a girlfriend, "OH I LOVE MY BEAUTIFUL GIRLFRIEND"... has sex four times in a year, thinks he's fucking Casanova.

Then, with us lads, just runs around pretty much describing her as his sex toy. And ripping on all his friends for "Not having sex when I'm having so much of it. Oh, I wish I was with her, having sex now, like you fags aren't."

Then, in front of girls: "Oh, I miss her so terribly. I really love her."
That type of two-faced douchebaggery really gets on my nerves.
 

Varrdy

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Feb 25, 2010
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MurderousToaster said:
He proceeds to start making jokes about religion because, of course, he thinks he's being trendy, hip and edgy by being one of those annoying atheists who can't just not believe in religion
What's wrong with that? Being an Athiest is no more annoying than some shite knocking on your door at 8am on a Sunday and shoving a copy of The Watchtower in your face.

I also like Mock the Week too but getting back to the original point, I think I know where you are coming from. While I know people similar to that, I don't think any of them could top your "friend" for complete arseholery!

Me being me, I am somewhat intolerant of folk like that because, while I acknowledge I am not exacly Mr. Silvertongue Eloquent myself, I am a member of the furry fandom and, sadly, it seems to attract way more fuckwits than it does nice people. Unfortunately for them, I tend not to mince my words and if someone's being a cock, I tell them so and in no uncertain terms.

While it's fine to vent and lay bear this person's litany of idiocy, it will do nothing to resolve the situation. If you really hate this guy I am sorry but it's "cruel to be kind" time. By that I mean being cruel to him in order to be kind to yourself.

If subtle hint-dropping doesn't work then I'm sorry but it's time for the big guns and if you play it right, you can come out of this on the moral high ground. The next time he starts, pull him up quick and explain that he's just being annoying and should change the record, as it were. If he carries on, stop him again and ask if he heard what you said. IF he says "yes" BUT refuses to change then you can nail him in the balls with the "Knowing you're being a twat does NOT excuse it!" nuke and be justified in telling him to fuck off and never come near you again. Of course he will complain to everyone who will listen but if everyone else has the same opinion on the guy they should be relied on to show him a black card.

If he doesn't come out with the desired response, lay it all out anyway and maybe even show him your original post as a kind of vitriolic Cliff Notes. Hopefully this too will make him go away.

In either case, it's the only way you'll get rid of him (without resorting to physical violence) and, if everyone else feels the same way they will be too busy standing behind you, leaning over your shoulder and shaking their fists at him as they growl "Yeaaahhh!" to listen to him wail.

Warning: Depending on your personality and regardless of his, taking it to extremes may induce feelings of guilt for a while but they should pass and, until they do, ease the feelings by re-reading your OP to remind yourself what a shite he is and how much better off you are without him.

Best of luck!

Wardy
 

Mr Pantomime

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Yeah, i had a friend like that. Everyone stopped talking to him, but he still goes round to one of my friends house from time to time, even though my friend hates him too. But he lost his car, so hes immobile. I havetn seen him in months. as for online gaming, he doesnt know my accounts. when he asked i made some excuse
 

hardlymotivated

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May 20, 2009
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Is it really that difficult to tell him to fuck off? Just... don't be friends with him any more. I used to know somebody fairly similar to him years and years ago, and it really was as simple as that. "Fuck off."

If you're not up for it, why not just block him from MSN/Steam/however he attempts to contact you?
 

Tharwen

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May 7, 2009
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I have this spread evenly over two friends. One matches the first half about generally considering himself above the people around him; the other matches the bit about spamming messages and complaining about religion.
 

Durgiun

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Dec 25, 2008
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I read it all because I have a friend who's similar to the description you gave. He is by no means a dick, but he's annoying as hell because he always talks about shit that noone cares about. AND he talks about it as if he's fucking thirteen. God forbid that there's a hot woman as a mascot for a new game (you know, the one that looks like any given supermodel) because he's gonna talk for weeks how she's hot and how he wants to do her (he's a virgin, by the way). He's a bloody graphics whore before anything else and he just won't. Shut. Up. About some fucking celebrity actress that doesn't look even the least bit attractive.

Still, he has a wider screen plasma with HDMI, so I hang with him from time to time.
 

MurderousToaster

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Varrdy said:
MurderousToaster said:
He proceeds to start making jokes about religion because, of course, he thinks he's being trendy, hip and edgy by being one of those annoying atheists who can't just not believe in religion
What's wrong with that? Being an Athiest is no more annoying than some shite knocking on your door at 8am on a Sunday and shoving a copy of The Watchtower in your face.
-shnippity shnip shnap-
I wasn't complaining about Atheists. I have many Atheist friends. It's just this guy seems to believe that by making generally wrong assumptions about anyone even slightly associated with religion he's being a genuine stand-up comedian, despite the jokes lacking anything that could be even called taste or humour. They're always badly-thought-out, distasteful, low-brow jokes that generally just include him making a wrong assumption, making a shit joke out of it and then, after being proven wrong by the person he's making a joke about continuing to believe he's correct. Like the one about Christians not believing in gravity I mentioned. That is completely, 110% incorrect and yet he still proceeded to make a joke about it.
 

TimbukTurnip

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Jan 3, 2009
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Can't say I've ever known anyone like this. By the sounds of it he's clinging to you and you alone. Just block him on everything and tell him to fuck off, because he sounds like a right arse.
 

Griphphin

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Jul 4, 2009
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Had a "friend" like that back in high school, actually a friend of a friend (who was awesome) that didn't sit at our lunch table anymore, so he was just there -_-
And oh god the inane arguments...
 

fullbleed

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Apr 30, 2008
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MurderousToaster said:
*Great text wall of china*
Wow sounds like all of my worst friends rolled into one. One of my firends is always texting me and emailing me and half of the time its him complaining that I haven't replied yet, I'm not fixed to my computer screen 24/7, I don't even check my emails all that often. He then wines that he doesn't have any texts left, then stp fucking texting me! Esspecially when it's just a text saying "Reply to my texts! *Wimper, whine*"

I hate those kind of atheists though, ones who will talk about religion always opressing people and forcing their beliefs on others, but then never shutting up about atheisim and constaly forcing it on people they know are religious.
 

oppp7

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Aug 29, 2009
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I really can't say much 'cuz I'm pretty sure you just described me(except the militant atheist part).
 

GruntOwner

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He's a PS3 elitist, who thinks that his facebook status updates are going to bring joy to people's life and that he's some kind of life guru. He'll demand hugs and people will either say no or, in the case of one girl, recoil in shock at his ambush while clutching her folder to her heart, shaking her head barely able to speak to him for fear of a conversation. When considering inviting him to join us for a meal, the afore mentioned girl and her boyfriend have the following conversation.

Her: Should we invite Max?
Him: Uh, why?
Her: Because he's your friend.
Him: Actually, I think you'll find that he's YOUR friend.

Turns out our entire circle only tolerated him because they thought that the rest of us liked him. It was VERY funny when we first found that out.
 

Vhite

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Aug 17, 2009
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I dont have any friend like that so that must mean...
No, no, no I can be annoying but not like that.
 

Varrdy

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Feb 25, 2010
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MurderousToaster said:
I wasn't complaining about Atheists. I have many Atheist friends. It's just this guy seems to believe that by making generally wrong assumptions about anyone even slightly associated with religion he's being a genuine stand-up comedian, despite the jokes lacking anything that could be even called taste or humour. They're always badly-thought-out, distasteful, low-brow jokes that generally just include him making a wrong assumption, making a shit joke out of it and then, after being proven wrong by the person he's making a joke about continuing to believe he's correct. Like the one about Christians not believing in gravity I mentioned. That is completely, 110% incorrect and yet he still proceeded to make a joke about it.
Fair enough. Jokes are not that bad, to be honest. It's if the jokes turn into serious rants you need to worry. If I am honest I am an Athiest and somewhat serious about it but if we ever want to be taken seriously we need to avoid saying things that are patently untrue. Leave that to Scientologists and anyone who complained about the inclusion of "hardcore sex scenes" in Mass Effect.

Wardy