The Big Picture: Nothing Gold Can Stay - The Most Bizarre Episode of Transformers

[CrazyGirl17]

Well... that was depressing. And the sudden happy music at the end of the episode didn't help. Maybe they were going for a message there, but I think a lack of music would have worked better. (I also wished they'd spared the time to make a scene of Optimus or one of the other Autobots telling Beachcomber they'd fix the mess they'd inadvertently made. Send a good message to the kiddies, y'know?)

Eh, personally I prefer the later Transformers series, but I suppose the original had it moments.

One thing though...was the "Tree Hugger" robot voiced by...Falcor?! All I could hear while he was smooth talking nature was "Never give up and luck will always find you"

Holy crap, I thought he sounded familiar! I looked it up on TFWiki.net (a must-visit for Transformers fans), and it turns out he's voiced by none other than Alan Oppenheimer, who voiced Falkor and the likes of Skeletor and Mighty Mouse! ...Go figure.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

WTF did I just watch??? That was just bizarre.

 

[K12]

The Narnia reference is even closer than Bob mentioned.

In one of the other Narnia books (Voyage of the Dawn Treader) there is a lake which turns things gold, although they literally turn to solid gold rather than just have a golden plating.

 

[Jacked Assassin]

Huh, well that's pretty interesting... I'm rather curious about those other G1 episodes Bob mentioned as well, in particular the Key to Vector Sigma, since that I remember from a later transformers incarnation.

Assuming it was Beast Machines.... prepare for some bad spoilers to a bad plot.

In Beast Machines Tankor finds out his true identity. After doing so he then plots against their version of Megatron to take over the Vehicons. He does so by finding the key to Vector Sigma. And decides to use it to turn organics into metal. He also then gives out information to Optimus Primal about a device that will destroy non organic material.

Tankor however ultimately fails because he thought he could predict what this Megatron & Optimus Primal would do with these weapons. This Megatron not only outwits Tankor but also turns all organics into metal. Meanwhile Optimus Primal basically decides to destroy every after that out of Spite.

Everyone Dies! The End!
....
Or it would have been if Optimus Primal's willpower didn't magically undo all of the damage....

 

[angel85]

Wait...everyone was covered in Electrum, rendering them totally immune to laser fire...yet in the battle they all proceeded to endlessly blast at each other with nothing but lasers! That would be like showing up to a war where both sides are armed with spitballs and nerf darts! It would literally have been more productive (and caused less collateral damage) if they fired missiles, used swords and clubs, or even just PUNCHED each other during the fight...

 

[V4Viewtiful]

I couldn't have been the only one who was like "Oh my gawd, the Trees!" XD

Anyway, I think Transformers Armada did a more straight forward episode on the subject.

 

[truckspond]

Wow... the music really does highlight the cognitive dissonance that surrounds the franchise as a whole and most obviously the Autobots who seem to do more detruction than protection

 

[RTR]

All I could think of while watching the reveal of "Narnia".

 

[Kameburger]

I love that one of those animation shots just has a bunch of golden robots seemingly firing in all directions except at each other. Best Big Picture in a long time!

 

[red255]

Electrum was never mentioned again? I seem to recall Electrum in one of the later series maybe.

 

[Ashley Blalock]

G1, Beast Wars, Transformers Prime, seems like there are better Transformers related things to do this weekend than go to the movie theater.

 

[daxterx2005]

You'd think with such a piss poor ending like that, they would have made some sort of follow up story.
Even a comic exclusive continuation would have been welcome.

 

[leviadragon99]

Huh, well that's pretty interesting... I'm rather curious about those other G1 episodes Bob mentioned as well, in particular the Key to Vector Sigma, since that I remember from a later transformers incarnation.

Assuming it was Beast Machines.... prepare for some bad spoilers to a bad plot.

In Beast Machines Tankor finds out his true identity. After doing so he then plots against their version of Megatron to take over the Vehicons. He does so by finding the key to Vector Sigma. And decides to use it to turn organics into metal. He also then gives out information to Optimus Primal about a device that will destroy non organic material.

Tankor however ultimately fails because he thought he could predict what this Megatron & Optimus Primal would do with these weapons. This Megatron not only outwits Tankor but also turns all organics into metal. Meanwhile Optimus Primal basically decides to destroy every after that out of Spite.

Everyone Dies! The End!
....
Or it would have been if Optimus Primal's willpower didn't magically undo all of the damage....

Yeah, that's what I remembered it from... Beast Machines didn't quite live up to the standards set by Beast Wars and got rather weird, but it had its high points as well as the low points.

 

[Tim Chuma]

I used to have a Beachcomber figure as a kid, cool. My brother was a fan of the Decepticons more for some reason.

On the subject of weird episodes I remember seeing "The Sacred Rock" episode of M.A.S.K and thinking it was super racist and dumb at the time it originally screened, it is doubly so now. Uluru was supposedly full of gold and treasure? http://io9.com/the-time-m-a-s-k-took-a-super-racist-australian-vacati-476453736

 

[maxben]

SOMEONE ELSE REMEMBERS BEAST MACHINES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone remembers the terrible follow-up to the greatness of Beast Wars, we just don't like to talk about it

Obviously you meant to say Beasties! Here in Canada they decided that "Wars" was inappropriate for children

 

[Lono Shrugged]

Man listening to Beachcomber's voice makes me feel stoned out of my mind.


I am also happy to see The Big Picture return to it's rightful subject matter. Weird pop culture shit

 

[twosage]

SOMEONE ELSE REMEMBERS BEAST MACHINES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone remembers the terrible follow-up to the greatness of Beast Wars, we just don't like to talk about it

But beyond that Beasts Machines was horrible.

With all due respect, that is a bunch of slag.

Sure, Beast Machines had it's problems and very much went off the rails in a dozen different ways, but it is unquestionably one of the best Transformers series ever attempted.

While Beast Wars and G1 basically presented a roughly-equal Good vs. Bad series of skirmishes over an ill-defined resource or goal (in basically the same vein of G.I. Joe, He-Man, and so many others), Beast Machines was about a group of flawed underdogs against a sinister omni-present villain over the fate of their world and the philosophy to govern it. They weren't just fighting to fight. Most interesting to me was how the "organic vs. synthetic" dichotomy broke down once it was revealed that (get this): In his zeal, Optimus was just as wrong as Megatron. Not just for one episode, but for the better part of a season. As far as Saturday morning cartoons go, that's earth-shattering. This was a series that dared to suggest that being mind-controlled for months to attack the people you love leaves lasting emotional scars that don't just go away because you get reformatted. A series that dissolved the clear chain of command and allowed its characters and viewers to genuinely doubt that "leader knows best".

Beast Machines was a subversion of a Transformers series. It was continuity-heavy, dark, moody, philosophical, stubbornly anti-militaristic, and (the cardinal sin) the character designs did not translate well to being toys. Sure, it's crazy flawed too, but to me, it was beautiful in all of its flaws.

 

[maximara]

Well.....that's dark for G1 Transformers. I thought showing the Zentraedi nuking the earth in Robotech was a dark as 80 cartoons got.

Well The Super Dimension Fortress Macross (the first "generation" of Robotech) was a Japanese cartoon and they allowed things that would have NEVER been showed on a United States made show. IMHO GI Joe came close in the five episode "G.I. Joe: The Revenge of Cobra" (where Duke and Snakeyes are forced to fight via mind control head bands) "Worlds Without End" (where the three skeletal remains of Joes are shown) and "There's No Place Like Springfield" (where Shipwreck is driven to the point of insanity in the effort to extract a formula in his subconscious).

Of all the toy based cartoons I watched in the 1980s Gi Joe seemed to push the envelope the most times.

In fact, what I have read the ending parts of "There's No Place Like Springfield" were so intense they they were cut from all later showings of the episode and even the DVD.