The Bystander Effect...

[MasterOfWorlds]

I'd have gone to see what was up. If someone screams, I look to see what's going on.

I've stopped a mother from smacking her kid before. I didn't do it the first time because I wasn't expecting it, but when she raised her hand again, I grabbed it and told her that if I saw here lay a hand on the kid again, I'd call Child Protective Services on her. I'm all for the swat on the behind if the kid needs it, but a closed handed slap across the face on a 4-5 year old is unacceptable, period.

Same thing with that case about the girl being gang raped at her prom. I'd have called the police and said, "Yeah, I'll be the guy in the blood spattered tux. I'll do what I can to keep them off of her until you get here."

If I see someone that needs help, i do what I can for them unless they're obviously taking care of it themselves.

 

[Actual]

This isn't the bystander effect, this just looks exactly like a kid throwing a tantrum at their parent which we've all seen countless times before. I'd definitely ignore this and keep walking.

 

[inFAMOUSCowZ]

It made me feel pretty good that those two guys went to do something. I see this sort of thing sometimes when I'm at the movies (not the kidnapping). If the sound isnt playing I give it a minute to see if the people in charge will fix it then I go out and tell them whats going on. While everyone else complains that it isnt working. One time I yelled at them before I left,"Maybe you you people would ACTUALLY move something would get down, but thats just to much to ask for isnt it" Then I fixed the problem again.

 

[rockingnic]

I know kids that use that line on their real dads... I think it's normal to walk away from that and think it's just some kid misbehaving in public, every kid does it. They need to recreate a better kidnapping scenario.

 

[ThatLankyBastard]

This isn't the bystander effect, this just looks exactly like a kid throwing a tantrum at their parent which we've all seen countless times before. I'd definitely ignore this and keep walking.

Well... the people are all either assuming that someone else will help or don't want to get involved with it...

I'd say that's at least partially the Bystander Effect...

 

[SoulSalmon]

I would have done something if that sort of thing didn't happen EVERY DAY around here because someones mother bought them a Wii instead of an Xbox -.-

I get the point, but this was a rather bad example tbh.

 

[gostlyfantom]

well in defense of those who walked by, it did look like a kid throwing a tantrum BUT the LEAST they could have done was make sure it wasnt an abduction.

and hats off to the guys who actually went after the dude

 

[Danpascooch]

I would have said something, but that did NOT look like a kidnapping, it looked like a child throwing a tantrum.

He was dragging her down the street at like 2mph, if that was real, you can bet your ass he would be moving faster than that, she looked like she weighed like 60 pounds, he could have just scooped her up and left. Also he was doing NOTHING to try to quiet her screams for help.

Honestly, nothing about that looked like kidnapping, she was yelling "you're not my dad" but for all we know that means he's her stepfather and she's throwing a tantrum because she hates him. If it looked more like a kidnapping (IE Him running, or a hand over her mouth) I bet there would have been a LOT more responders.

I would have asked what was going on, but not thought "oh shit, kidnapper!"

 

[Jezzy54]

I remember a year or two ago I was walking through the city when two guys knocked down a third guy and dragged him into an alley. I didn't know what was going on exactly, but I didn't even try to call the police. I felt like a massive jerk afterward. I don't remember anything on the news later on about a guy being stabbed or whatever, but I really don't know how it ended up.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Personally I'd have done the same as I've done before - Walk straight past, dial 999 (911) and, from cover, feedback to the police.

If I'm wrong, no problem. If I'm right, I did my best.

But I wouldn't confront them, I see worse things happening to kids from their parents most days. And a lot of these kids know exactly what buttons to push on bystanders, to a point where I've almost been tempted to move against someone that I know is well within their rights.

That said, I've also seen Mothers open-handed slap their children - but when it's their word against yours, there's literally nothing you can do.


Another thing that "Stranger Danger" seems to forget: Over 95% of abductions are done by someone the child knows and trusts.

 

[Danpascooch]

This isn't the bystander effect, this just looks exactly like a kid throwing a tantrum at their parent which we've all seen countless times before. I'd definitely ignore this and keep walking.

Well... the people are all either assuming that someone else will help or don't want to get involved with it...

I'd say that's at least partially the Bystander Effect...

No it's not, if they assume it's a tantrum, they aren't assuming "someone else will help" they are assuming that there is no help needed.

That's exactly what I would have assumed too, he was moving slowly, and doing nothing to quiet her screams for help, it looked nothing like a kidnapping.

 

[Plurralbles]

I think the others would be too worried about what happens to them if they do anything.

Have their name plastered in a newspaper story about them making a mistake?

Unnecessarily cause someone else emotional anguish(I'd be really upset if my child's yelling made people think I wasn't their dad and that I would kidnap a child)

 

[V8 Ninja]

It's not surprising. People would rather ignore these kinds of situations than waste their time and possibly risk their lives. It sounds selfish, and it is. Humans are just like that.

 

[Danpascooch]

I like how those 2 guys looked at each other like "we're about to save this kid" and dashed towards the guy, followed by the fake kidnapper quickly responding that they are on tv in a 'please don't hurt me' tone. At least somebody realized that the kid needed help.

Except, the kid didn't need help.....

It didn't even LOOK like the kid needed help, watch the video again, it looks like he struggling to pull her around, do you see how TINY she is? Looked like he was being gentle because he was, that's not something a kidnapper does.

A kidnapper ALSO doesn't do nothing to stop a kid from screaming for help a dozen times.

 

[Red Right Hand]

I dunno, it's not really the bystander effect if the bystanders can't be sure that a crime is actually being committed.

 

[Red Right Hand]

I like how those 2 guys looked at each other like "we're about to save this kid" and dashed towards the guy, followed by the fake kidnapper quickly responding that they are on tv in a 'please don't hurt me' tone. At least somebody realized that the kid needed help.

Except, the kid didn't need help.....

It didn't even LOOK like the kid needed help, watch the video again, it looks like he struggling to pull her around, do you see how TINY she is? Looked like he was being gentle because he was, that's not something a kidnapper does.

A kidnapper ALSO doesn't do nothing to stop a kid from screaming for help a dozen times.

Exactly, if I was the kidnapper I would want to shut her up and get the hell out of there pronto. The guy looked like he was handling his own kid,.. with care.

 

[Dags90]

But to be fair, I wouldn't say screaming for help repeatedly is a cliche in real life...

It's pretty well established that children are more or less sociopaths with limited understanding of how their actions affect others and are naturally naive/ignorant. It's not unheard of for children to feign kidnapping in order to try and manipulate their parents. And this looks way more like that than kidnapping because it doesn't look anything like a real kidnapping.

 

[Devil's Due]

It's not that I don't want to help, I'd sure as hell help if this situation arised as I was raised in a military family where social justice is a high order, and to aid those in need is as well.

But the problem with this that causes many people to stop and stand back is the legal obligations. The law in the United States is you may watch at a distance and not be legally obligated to help, but the minute you start helping you cannot stop. Also comes the effect if they're honestly their parents and the kid's being bratty, they can call you up on harassment or other charges if you disrupt their time. So in reality, we want to help, but with the current days laws and social realities, it's a minefield. You can either reap a reward of aiding those in need and possible recognition from those that notice your actions. On the other, you can screw up and get jail time, or worse, depending on what actions you take.

Most just stay the hell away, and I honestly want to. But if I ever honestly saw something happening that was unjust, I'd begin to intervene and at least try to figure out what the hell is going on, and the appropriate action to take.

 

[game-lover]

I have to disagree with you that say a kidnapper would try to shut her up.

If you all can say you'd assume he just had a kid with a tantrum, why wouldn't he take advantage of your misconception? You said just a moment ago that if he'd tried to keep her quiet and rush off, it would have made you act 'cause it looked more suspicious.

With that logic, he did exactly the smart thing because it completely threw you off his trail. Everyone would ignore, he'd slowly drag the "disobedient girl" away and bam, successful kidnapping.

The same with all who said they need a better kidnapping scenario. Why? You think just because this scenario is lame that it's not a real thing that happens? Not all of them are particularly fast and scary and whoa!

Remember that story about the girl who was taken away by some dude on security camera. He just took her hand and walked away. There's no exact way to kidnap someone. It can be in any way and in any form.

 

[Veldaroth]

Yeah, we discussed this in a psychology class. Essentially, people tend to assume that nothing is wrong unless specifically told otherwise. That is why kids are told to yell, "Stranger." By saying "you're not my dad," everyone probably assumed he was a stepfather and that they just weren't getting along.

Never simply scream or yell help, you have to tell bystanders specifically what is happening and what they should do about it. Stupid, I know, but that's humanity for ya