The "Gay Accent"

[JimB]

In one of his books (I used to have a copy, where the hell did it go?), David Sedaris, a gay man, talks about the childhood difficulties he had overcoming his lisp and the battles with his speech therapist. No idea if the lisp he had is the lisp we're talking about, though.

 

[Stg]

I remember a gay guy at work hated the "gay lisp" and wouldn't date anyone who used one.

A buddy of mine is the exact same way. He is very openly gay, but he doesn't act like a girl and he despises anyone who acts flamboyant. Then again, he isn't into the whole twinks, so it could also be a sexual preference thing.

 

[adamsaccount]

In one of his books (I used to have a copy, where the hell did it go?), David Sedaris, a gay man, talks about the childhood difficulties he had overcoming his lisp and the battles with his speech therapist. No idea if the lisp he had is the lisp we're talking about, though.

If its the sh instead of s one, thats the one i had, went to speech therapist for it too, but that was also to get rid of my mumbling, grew out of the lisp but not the mumbling

 

[Mutie]

The campest sounding man I have ever met, that being my older brother's best friend, is straight as an arrow and now married to a beautiful French woman. My own best friend is Stephen Fry mixed with Oscar Wild with a taste for Dylan Moran and would shoot furious lasers from his eyes at any (his own words) "mincing puffs" whom cross his path.

Go figure, I suppose :/ Why do obnoxious man-boy metallers (I never was much of a tribesman) use phrases like "lulz" and "fo da metulz" in actual speech now? Sure as Hel beats me -.-

 

[JimB]

In one of his books (I used to have a copy, where the hell did it go?), David Sedaris, a gay man, talks about the childhood difficulties he had overcoming his lisp and the battles with his speech therapist. No idea if the lisp he had is the lisp we're talking about, though.

If it's the sh instead of s one, that's the one I had.

Nope. It's the one where an S becomes a TH. Presumably if he went to a speech therapist, the problem was more severe than just Big Gay Al calling Stan a thilly goothe, but he is not clear on that topic in the book I have (by the by, I found it, it's called Me Talk Pretty One Day and was, for no reason I can account for, shelved between a Nelson Demille and a Douglas Adams book).

 

[adamsaccount]

In one of his books (I used to have a copy, where the hell did it go?), David Sedaris, a gay man, talks about the childhood difficulties he had overcoming his lisp and the battles with his speech therapist. No idea if the lisp he had is the lisp we're talking about, though.

If it's the sh instead of s one, that's the one I had.

Nope. It's the one where an S becomes a TH. Presumably if he went to a speech therapist, the problem was more severe than just Big Gay Al calling Stan a thilly goothe, but he is not clear on that topic in the book I have (by the by, I found it, it's called Me Talk Pretty One Day and was, for no reason I can account for, shelved between a Nelson Demille and a Douglas Adams book).

Okidoke, thanks for the book recomendations, I looked up gay lisp on wikipedia and have been zooming all over the place, yknow how wikipedia goes, you click one link then another, then you get to the weird part, then youre friend texts you,so usual apologies to the other forum goers for being so god damn flamboyant
So long and thanks for all the fish!

 

[adamsaccount]

The campest sounding man I have ever met, that being my older brother's best friend, is straight as an arrow and now married to a beautiful French woman. My own best friend is Stephen Fry mixed with Oscar Wild with a taste for Dylan Moran and would shoot furious lasers from his eyes at any (his own words) "mincing puffs" whom cross his path.

Go figure, I suppose :/ Why do obnoxious man-boy metallers (I never was much of a tribesman) use phrases like "lulz" and "fo da metulz" in actual speech now? Sure as Hel beats me -.-

Dude, my cousins like that, he wears nothing but paisley and minces about. Just needs a cane, a coat and some begonias, and he's there, I cant really work out who youre having a go at in the last paragraph, its 6:42 in the morning and I need some sleep so could you please clarify, bear with me here been awake far too long

 

[holy_secret]

I don't have the gay lisp thingy but my boyfriend does. It really annoys the crap out of me sometimes. But that's just the way he is, and I love him the same.

http://i.imgur.com/4v7zYz3.jpg

 

[ReservoirAngel]

Eugh, that thing.

I would say it is a deliberate way of talking that the obnoxious kinds of homosexuals put on.
There's two kinds of homosexuals.
Sensible ones, who don't go on and on about it. That you could'nt tell were gay. They can be as masculine as a straight man and their sexuality does'nt matter.

And attention seeking twats who spend their entire time trying to be as stereotypical and attention seeking as possible.
They think they're precious ickle snowflakes and everyone must love them and praise them for being gay.

Of course you can get more feminine sounding men. And they're straight as can be.
But that's a case of how they are. That's them, not a put on act.

That stereotypical valley girl, gay lisp, thing, is a blatant construct.

I cannot stand people who talk like that, whatever their gender and sexuality.

Thing is, as much as it pains me to admit it because I kind of hate being lumped in with the stereotypes... some of us are just like that naturally, no effort required. Sure there are those among the gay community who will put the lisp on and play up the campy mannerisms for whatever reason, but some people are just naturally, 100% fire island queens. It happens.

Also I'm struggling not to be slightly offended by the (maybe unintentional, I don't know) assumption that if you're not totally hetero-acting then you're somehow not sensible and are just a twat who wants attention.

I speak as someone who to this day nobody has ever figured out I'm gay without me either telling them or just making it obvious in some way, but that can be prone to very campy moments.

 

[Silvanus]

I mean that I've never met or seen a heterosexual who thought their sexually made them precious and needed bringing up every five minutes.
They're like, yep, I do this, like this, and I've got a wife/husband. The focus is them, not their sexuality.

Surely you've seen those who, at a club or a bar or just out and about, will make their interest in the opposite sex blindingly obvious? Some people will comment to you, even if they don't know you, about the sweetness of so-and-so's rack, or regale others with last night's exploits at work.

The emphasis isn't on the fact that they're straight, certainly, but that's only because the straightness is assumed. The emphasis is, nonetheless, on what they've done or what they would like to do, and how everybody should know about it, because damn, dat ass.

I think you may be overlooking how equivalent behaviour exists among straight people.

 

[paulbnet]

I agree with the "socialect" thing.

I am of the opinion that the "Gay Lisp" started probably way back over 35 years ago when being gay was illegal and socially unacceptable. I may be wrong but was it not part of the whole "Gay law" putting hankies in different pockets, men having their right ear pierced etc. Thinking of the likes of Kenneth Williams who was loved by the nation even though he was really good with colours, at a time when you could go to prison for it.

So yeah I think it probably came about as a way of sticking it (pardon the pun) to the man, and identifying with a social group.

In my opinion, now a lot of the time(and to be clear I am not talking about men who sound effeminate of either sexuality) the FORCED "Gay Lisp" is only put on, like purportedly straight men acting "well 'ard", by annoying people who MUST be the centre of attention. It fucks me off as it really irritating, makes me feel uncomfortable and seems to me to be redundant in todays society, kind of like gay pride marches. For true equality, one should in my opinion stop drawing attention to ones differences.
.

Full disclosure: I am though not gay, but I am also not Homophobic, and I am a Big fan of Kenneth Williams.

 

[DrunkOnEstus]

I'm a straight guy, and this is something I think about quite a lot. My best friend all through high school was gay, but I never had a clue based on the way he talked. I found out when he took a stab at it (with fear of potential violence, sadly) and asked me out, hoping I was "at least bi".

My friendship with him led me to a lot of rallies, parades, and volunteer counseling for LGBT people who were living a crappy life due to their sexual preference tied with living in Indiana. My point is that I've intimately spoken with literally hundreds of gay men, particularly about being gay and the "lifestyle".

My verdict...there are some people who are totally "the stereotype", where not a day goes by where it turns off. Very feminine (traditionally, I guess...these things are getting harder to discuss), storing away most negativity/cynicism in order to put on a face and attitude of glee and somewhat extreme optimism. There were a lot of people who introduced themselves to me in the manner being described in this thread, only to "shut it off" when we got to talking about abusive/unsupportive parents or equally serious matters.

I never heard the world "socialect" before this thread, and it makes a lot of sense. It seemed to me that this socialect was a useful way to make themselves identifiable and to find potential mates, particularly in the very limited and potentially dangerous rural areas of Indiana. It seemed less prevalent (as a subconscious act) in people who came from more liberal and understanding areas such as Los Angeles or New York. Of course, each person is different in many ways, and the line between "natural use" and "social/cultural act" can blur.

Not that I'm not a straight ally now, but talking about this makes me miss my years of "actively" being a straight ally. Got some people to catch up with...

 

[poundingmetal74]

My verdict...there are some people who are totally "the stereotype", where not a day goes by where it turns off. Very feminine (traditionally, I guess...these things are getting harder to discuss), storing away most negativity/cynicism in order to put on a face and attitude of glee and somewhat extreme optimism. There were a lot of people who introduced themselves to me in the manner being described in this thread, only to "shut it off" when we got to talking about abusive/unsupportive parents or equally serious matters.

That's quite interesting about the "shutting it off" part when discussing familial relationships or other traumas.

By the way, there was a fascinating Norweigan documentary (mostly in English) which discusses the question of "are you born gay" and they discuss things like gaydar and being able to spot gay people. If you're still counseling, this might be of great benefit to some of those you counsel.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=J04bRx2MGi4‎

 

[Wolf In A Bear Suit]

Well that's interesting because I know a few gay people who from a really young age of starting school spoke with this accent and I really didn't get where it came from, because at this age I don't think anyone had an idea of what 'gay' was. Obviously it became really pronounced when our voices started breaking. So yeah, I'd be curious as to what the cause of this accent might be. The only thing I can think of is a dominant feminine presence who raised them.

 

[purf]

We have a reality celebrity here who's going all out on the stereotype and I can't help but think "This guy is what makes people hate us" whenever he pops up.

Clicked on your profile to see whether you're from Denmark. SmilingOutLoud now