The glass is half full...or is it?
- Thread starter the monopoly guy
- Start date
Because it is clearly half empty.the monopoly guy said:
Why is the glass half empty?
Because a Spy was sippin' it!
Get it? Sipping? Instead of sapping? Comic genius, people.
A good lawyer then goes on to lead a class-action lawsuit "on behalf of the victims" against any and every entity that may be responsible for half of the contents of the glass having been unjustly denied to the populace that wanted full glasses. What was in the glass and whether the glass was indeed half empty as opposed to half full is dismissed as immaterial, the sternographer is instructed to strike it from the record, and the jury is asked to disregard all testimony related to whether or not the glass is actually half empty or half full.Johnn Johnston said:
The lawyer makes millions, the class of "victims" each gets $1.37, and the lawyer then goes on to work as a lobbyist for the glass industry in favor of Congressional mandates stating that a glass must be "x" high by "y" wide and hold "z" amount of a substance.
US Edition - glass of milk
A Democrat sees the glass as half empty due to the rich oppressing the poor; only immediate government action can ensure that everyone gets the same half glass of milk.
A Republican sees the glass as half full and demands to know who stole half his milk; only if the government gets out of the way will the glass ever be full again.
A Libertarian sees the level of the glass as irrelevant and demands to know why he can't have pot with his milk; stupid Fascist government.
A Green sees the glass as half full and demands to know who raped a cow.
A Democrat sees the glass as half empty due to the rich oppressing the poor; only immediate government action can ensure that everyone gets the same half glass of milk.
A Republican sees the glass as half full and demands to know who stole half his milk; only if the government gets out of the way will the glass ever be full again.
A Libertarian sees the level of the glass as irrelevant and demands to know why he can't have pot with his milk; stupid Fascist government.
A Green sees the glass as half full and demands to know who raped a cow.
The equestrian gives it to her horse but can't make it drink.
The divorced man complains incessantly about how his ex-wife got half of his water.
The environmentalist checks the water quality and then points out the glass would be full if agribusiness didn't violate water use regulations all the time.
The divorced man complains incessantly about how his ex-wife got half of his water.
The environmentalist checks the water quality and then points out the glass would be full if agribusiness didn't violate water use regulations all the time.
A 4chan member sees the glass and draws boobies on a picture of it.
A comedian will make a joke about an inefficient bartender
A paranoid person would accuse others of drinking it
A smart ass will try to convince you that the glass is liquid. In which case you hit him round the head with the glass and ask him if it felt like a liquid
A comedian will make a joke about an inefficient bartender
A paranoid person would accuse others of drinking it
A smart ass will try to convince you that the glass is liquid. In which case you hit him round the head with the glass and ask him if it felt like a liquid
I think the glass is a entity DOUBLE THE SIZE trying to contain the pure, unsullied water whilst mocking it. And the water can't escape because it knows no other place to exist rather than falling as tears.
...or so my analyst says.
...or so my analyst says.
I prefer to see the glass half-full. To me it implies that someone filled part of my glass. Half-empty on the other hand, implies that someone took half of your liquid. Then, I would try to find out who took my liquid, which would breed anger, which would cause confusion, which would cause unnecesary destruction. That's my take on it, well at least at the moment.