The Needles: The Russians Are Coming!

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
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The Needles: The Russians Are Coming!

In these troubled times, when a decent videogame bad guy can be hard to find, there's one enemy you can always count on: the Russians.

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fix-the-spade

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Feb 25, 2008
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This may be a silly question but...

... Do the Russians buy the same games we do?
With games like Goldeneye, Op Flashpoint etc all being about killing Russians, do they enjoy it? Or, possibly even dafter, are the game reversed so they in fact blast away at Americans instead. That would make Jack Thompson so happy, an American Murder Simulator you say?

Then again, I can never see a game about mowing down hapless US Marines selling, not in the US at any rate...
 

ElephantGuts

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Jul 9, 2008
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As the article said, finally! Russia and Russians are so cool, and they've been completely boring since the Soviet Union collapsed. I looked up their government on wikipedia (because school won't teach me anything useful), and it barely deserves to be called a democracy. They should just call it, "What America has." Where's the pride and patriotism? The cool language and foreign edginess? I miss that Russia. The one that was eternally about to nuke us.

Maybe things will change now, maybe. I hope so, I'd like to see them do something worthy of being Russian.

And by the way, to any Russians: No offense, I was trying to complement you if anything saying how cool Russia is, they just need to get back that coolness. And I'm mostly of Russian descent (well it was Russia back then), so I can say what I want.
 

TheBadass

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Aug 27, 2008
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ShadowKirby post=6.73414.795043 said:
Thank God Palin is there to keep an eye on them.
Damn it, beat me to it.

I think the next big enemy should be the Welsh. I haven't seen one Welsh bad guy in all (two) years of shooting stuff, and it makes me wonder what I'm missing.

(I'm kidding, and no I'm not going to make a sheep joke, that's too easy)
 

RebelRising

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Jan 5, 2008
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ElephantGuts post=6.73414.794965 said:
As the article said, finally! Russia and Russians are so cool, and they've been completely boring since the Soviet Union collapsed. I looked up their government on wikipedia (because school won't teach me anything useful), and it barely deserves to be called a democracy. They should just call it, "What America has." Where's the pride and patriotism? The cool language and foreign edginess? I miss that Russia. The one that was eternally about to nuke us.

Maybe things will change now, maybe. I hope so, I'd like to see them do something worthy of being Russian.

And by the way, to any Russians: No offense, I was trying to complement you if anything saying how cool Russia is, they just need to get back that coolness. And I'm mostly of Russian descent (well it was Russia back then), so I can say what I want.
True dat, comrade.
 

BobisOnlyBob

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Nov 29, 2007
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Actually, China was responsible for the nuclear war in Fallout. They invaded Alaska, forcing America to annex Canada, and leading to all-out nuclear war.
 

ElephantGuts

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Jul 9, 2008
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BobisOnlyBob post=6.73414.795310 said:
Actually, China was responsible for the nuclear war in Fallout. They invaded Alaska, forcing America to annex Canada, and leading to all-out nuclear war.
I thought that was China? Or does China come in later?

Russians in World in Conflict are cool too. Their fuel-air bombs are the best part. I wanna get the 360 version so I can play the Soviet campaign.
 

stompy

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Jan 21, 2008
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Не потревожьтесь, жалкие американцы, мы сделает вас испугано снова, как раз как хорошие старые дни.

Водочка для всех камрадов!
 

ElephantGuts

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Jul 9, 2008
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stompy post=6.73414.795832 said:
Не потревожьтесь, жалкие американцы, мы сделает вас испугано снова, как раз как хорошие старые дни.

Водочка для всех камрадов!
You have no idea how much I wish I could do that.
 

uraniumman

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Aug 4, 2008
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That seems pretty selfish don't you think? I mean, wanting a war for the sake of video games? Is it too much to ask that todays game designers use their imaginations? They seem to be doing a fine job with Far Cry 2 and Dead Space and such.
 

Rovenkar

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Oct 8, 2008
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Oh... it never gets old to see the cliches yet again. It's kind of 'some tribal people out there still think the the Earth is flat' funny. Some people's desire to show the extent of their ignorance to the public is astonishing.

Actually it's quite simple to imagine what do Russians feel about games like Operation Flashpoint and World in flames. Just substitute "Russians" for "Americans" and visa versa throughout the plot and try to catch your reaction. Would you really believe that you're blood-craving, barbaric and stupid? I suppose not. Would you still play it? It depends, I suppose. I don't mind killing ultra-nationalist freaks in CoD 4, they are a threat to the fictional Russia in that game just like they are for the rest of the world. WiF and OFP are another matter entirely, I don't play both games as they make the player shoot those who share nationality with me. It's a matter of personal preference, however, as some don't care about the plot in games - most of them have none to speak of anyway.

Oh, and one more thing. I know that this article is tongue-in-cheek, like the majority of other Escapist ones. At the same time, there's such thing as 'over the top'. How would YOU react if I call your countrymen evil and definitely worth shooting en masse, videogame or not? Please try to apply the stuff you plan to write to yourself first. It's what adults are expected to do, you know?
 

corporate_gamer

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Apr 17, 2008
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Personally speaking Russians will always be more stereotyped as Vodka Drinking indestructable Russian Mafia; Boris the bullet dodger, the Vlads (Mercenaries + Max Payne) and the whole GTA4 story. Rather than the Communist Vodka Drinking deviously cunning coldly remorseless killing machines.
 

Vortigar

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Nov 8, 2007
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You know, we've been playing games as the American uber-soldier for so long, it's really time we turned the tables. The most dangerous and warlike nation on this planet is currently America, why not just turn the tables.

Get me a game where America has launched a world conquering campaign and the rest of the world is banding together to stop them. I could live with a modern US civil war as well, I'm not picky.

I always love playing as the Russians in video games. They're usually one of the better options and you get added funny accents. I even do this in games where it doesn't matter one jot like Olympics or something or even where it's a disadvantage like soccer or basketball. "Ivan make basket."

corporate_gamer:
You held on to that avatar? Way cool.

aside:
Everybody should be reading Brian Wood's DMZ.
 

PedroSteckecilo

Mexican Fugitive
Feb 7, 2008
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There are good reasons WHY Russians aren't depicted as the "evil empire"...

1) They weren't "evil" in a True nazi evil sense
2) They don't have AS strong a visual depicton and lastly...
3) They're still very sensitive about modern depictions of Russians in Pop Culture
Case and Point:
Many Russians complained about how they were depicted in Indiana Jones And The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

The Russians DO NOT want to be depicted as big bad evil empire villains unless it's as a Radical Offshoot (Metal Gear Solid 3) or as so obviously not real Russia that it doesn't matter (Red Alert)

Basically the Nazi's make great villains because they cannot defend themselves, and anyone who would defend the Nazi's doesn't have a valued opinion anyway, so they're great targets, unabashedly evil, visually striking and without a valid counter point in their philosophy (The Nazi's existed for 10 years, were stupidly evil, and did nothing but wage war)
 

lijenstina

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Jun 18, 2008
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Well it will go usually like this:

INTRO
- We must stop those pesky Ruskies, blah, blah, Reds, KGB, blah, blah, evil empire, blah, blah, democracy, blah, blah, invasion, freedom, A-bombs, blah, blah, the faith of the world....

--Skip---
--skip---
--skip---

*****Loading 1. level
 

Rooster Cogburn

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May 24, 2008
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For the record, Stalin made Hitler look like a Girl Scout. But come on, it's OK to have a sense of humor. The article just celebrates a fun old cliche, admittedly skewed though it may be.