The worst and most pointless weapon in any game.

[Starke]

Yeah, I'll give it that, it's a pretty uncompromising take on the Pen and Paper rules and it's alright if you're using it on regular old human mooks in small groups. I guess though, had I not been familiar with the tabletop game, I probably would have (understandably) thought, "Guns! Yeah, that's the ticket", especially because it actually sounds like it's got a decent kick to it.

I rolled a Tremere, though, and was familiar with the P&P rules, so I mostly just pawned any guns I found for blood and knives / swords.

I want to go play that game now. It was really good.

I've never been able to decide how much that was a deliberate theme. The game has a kinda... deranged habit of giving you the boilerplate explanations and then breaking the rules. One of the things Jack says before you get in the cab? "Crosses, holy water, they don't do shit"... then you run across a hunter with a true faith score. There's at least two very rare bloodlines, a changing breed that has a worldwide population in the double digits, and a character breaking out one of the six dot vicissitude abilities. And you've got a game that stays very true to the spirit of the setting, while lying to the player at every turn.

Actually, I suppose running into the Society of Leopold at all is kinda a kick in the teeth, especially given you're not really warned initially who you're dealing with...

And of course the Kuei-jin... though you're kinda warned. But, I don't even know where that door of tentacle death shit comes from. But... I'm not really versed in the Kuei-jin... just everything else wandering around in their back yard... >.<

 

[Ickorus]

The spoon in Project Zomboid is fairly useless though I did manage a kill with it yesterday.

Yeah, zombie slaying with a spoon; useless, if a little bit badass.

 

[bliebblob]

The Winger in Team Fortress 2.

To put in perspective, this is a sidearm for Scout.
A glass cannon who, ideally, has to be pretty darn close to get the most out of his weapons.
By default, his side arm is the regular pistol which delivers a decent amount of damage per hit (about 8 - 15 at it's optimum medium range distance) off of its so-so 12 round magazine.

Now, the Winger will net you about 10 - 17 at the same distance. An increase of 15%.
However, it does this on a pathetic 5 round magazine, meaning if all rounds hit for 17 you'd have dealt 85 damage instead of 180 (15 x 12) before reloading. In the same time frame, the regular pistol would have dealt 75 damage but would catch up and then some by firing even more (fire rate of 0.17s) while the Winger reloads (1.25s). The remaining 7 shots (105 damage) would be used up before the Winger would be able to retaliate, in other words.

So only use it if you want to willingly gimp yourself!

The way I interpreted it, it sacrifices sustained damage for burst potential. As you accurately calculated, the regular pistol can do more total damage, but only if your target sticks around long enough (longer than however long it takes to fire the regular pistol 6 times). But in practice this often isn't the case and you're actually better off with the winger. This also works the other way around in situations where you can't stick around too long, which for a scout is pretty much every situation. For example suppose there's a spinned up heavy on the 2fort bridge and you're trying to pick away at him from the front doors of your base. the winger would be better here because you can pop out, burst, and hide again. With the regular pistol this is also possible, but it would be less efficient.
And all of the above is under the assumption that every shot is a hit. If we also consider that some classes constantly cycle through phases where they are easier to hit (for example the scout between double jumps) the winger has the added advantage of being able to take better advantage of these moments because of it's bursts.

That said, as far as I'm concerned this level of nitpicking is pretty pointless anyway except maybe in a turn based strategy game. A fast paced shooter like tf2 just has too much random moment to moment situations. And on top of that what we're discussing here is a sidearm pistol. In a world where miniguns and rocket launchers are standard equipment it's so irrelevant it's hard to justify not switching it for something with a little more utility like the milk or bonk.

 

[JamesStone]

*Edit*

[HEADING=1]stop quoting me![/HEADING]

*poke*

OT: Flamethrowers in pretty much every game ever. There are some exceptions, of course. Far Cry 2 and 3 to be precise. Everywhere else it's as useless as spitting your opponents to death.

 

[drmigit2]

The cane in doctor jeckel and mr hyde. It's use is for killing bees, but you don't know that until you accidently kill one after trying to murder half the town who have by now thrown bombs at you. The game is pretty awful and the weapon makes it worse.

 

[MinkNyu]

I'm going to have to go with any Shotguns from any Metal Gear Solid. I've never found a reason to use them. There loud, and obvious to get you spotted, but the time you are using serious fire power, it's still Useless. I could probably think of some others, but I'll just list this one for now.

I thought they were pretty handy for those moments where you were forced to run and gun, mainly when you got spotted and had to clear a way to make your escape. It takes down enemies very quickly since it only takes one shot up close, making it so you only have to stop for a split second before you can continue to run for safety.

Congratz for giving me my first quote. I could see how that'd work, but I honestly found myself using a Machine gun or something like that in those situations. I guess the only real reason I listed it, is for the lack of use I had done with it. Other wise It'd seem like a decent run and gun weapon... I still prefer my Machine Gun though.

 

[Starke]

I played a game that bored me to tears and made me long for the sweet release of death.

Eh, I thought it was okay. But trust me, the magnum was a special kind of worthless. Maybe your memory is blocking it out for your own safety.

Honestly, I'm not even sure I kept carrying it, opting for a shotgun/assault rifle combo for most of the game. It just didn't measure up in the few times I did use it.

The PS20 from the original Deus ex. Need I say more?

Bonus points for it being based on glove guns, which are almost exactly that useless. I think the point of the PS20 was to be able to kill someone for their weapon if you were unarmed for some reason, and I think you get one in the first MJ12 facility before you can get your hands on anything else. But beyond that? Yeah.

 

[WanderingFool]

*Edit*

[HEADING=1]stop quoting me![/HEADING]

*poke*

OT: Flamethrowers in pretty much every game ever. There are some exceptions, of course. Far Cry 2 and 3 to be precise. Everywhere else it's as useless as spitting your opponents to death.

*pokes back*

Also, I agree with you for the most part. Some games it is good, but all it does in most is allows your enemies to catch you ablaze before they die... are resume shooting you...

 

[bliebblob]

There was also the laser weapons from X-com, weapons are not useless per se but you can instead research plasma and sacrifice nothing at all not to mention since captured enemies give you plasma rifles it makes more sense to not ever use them.

I found them quite handy actually. Even though plasma stuff usually started showing up in my research options before I even started laser research, I quickly learned not to skip lasers anyway. Going straight for plasma may get you end-game level weaponry a month or two faster, but until then you're fending off berserkers and cyberdiscs with starter weapons, which tends to result in way more injuries then I'm comfortable with. The main problem is that you have to research every weapon type individually plus the build costs of even a single plasma weapon are quite high. Meanwhile, laser weapons are unlocked in batches and aren't nearly as expensive to research or build. This made it possible to kit out my whole team with lasers weapons and nail that month's council mission while if I'd gone straight for plasma I'd have been going into that same council mission with maybe 2 guys with captured light plasma rifles and starter stuff on everyone else.

So long story short: I do not doubt it's possible to skip lasers using certain research orders. But if you prioritize carapace armor, like me, they're almost necessary to hold down the fort while you work on plasma. Otherwise there'd be noone but rookies left to wield em.

 

[TallanKhan]

For me it has to be the mutator gun from Resistance 3. I would love to know who came up with the idea: "lets make the player go through an entire section armed only with a gun that shoots sewage and eventually makes enemies sort of explode"

...And who agreed that was a good idea??

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

The fucking 'dessert fork' in Rule of Rose. It has the reach of a fork and it produces about as much damage as you might expect from a fork. To be fair, combat in that game sucks overall. At one point you can get a pistol and it takes just as forever to kill those bloody imps.

 

[Mikejames]

The switchblade from Silent Hill 3. It has the range of an unfolded paperclip and it does about the same amount of damage.
In a game where the combat is deliberately sticky and difficult, and weapons are usually for when you can't adequately evade enemies, may God have mercy on your soul if your last resort is a dinky little letter opener masquerading as a weapon.
Now, I will mention that it is ideal for a horror game to make your defenses pitiful in the face of whatever evil may be threatening you, so an equally pitiful weapon is reasonable. However, starting with that, and then promptly finding the "Holy Indestructable Super Fast Overpowered Katana of St. Michael" in the 3rd area of the game (which isn't even a secret or unlockable; it is literally sitting in a closet with nothing else) kind of ruins the point.

The blade probably had more chance of use than that taser, i.e., all the clunky convenience of close-range combat on batteries.

 

[Pink Gregory]

The Wooden Sword in Ninja Gaiden (fer Xbox, not the original).

Not only is it, well, a stick; it needs to be upgraded six times to unlock all of the moves.

...I won't pretend I haven't been tempted to do so.