Things you dont say or do at a funeral

[teebeeohh]

when my grandpa was buried a couple of years ago the priest kept talking about what a great family man he was(which he wasn't) so my dad stood up and said something along the lines of "bullshit, come on son, we are hitting the bar". I felt wicked cool standing up (i was 16) but to this day i rarely talk to this side of my family

 

[AngryLawnNinja]

DO NOT STREAK WITH A BUNCH OF YOUR DUMB BUDDIES

Cheers from Holland!

 

[Sir Strange Of The House Lycan]

when my grandpa was buried a couple of years ago the priest kept talking about what a great family man he was(which he wasn't) so my dad stood up and said something along the lines of "bullshit, come on son, we are hitting the bar". I felt wicked cool standing up (i was 16) but to this day i rarely talk to this side of my family

I'm not sure if that's awesomely truthful or terribly insensitive.

 

[ethaninja]

Never laugh loudly. Never.

I'm the descendant of an extremely Atheist father, who hates everything religion, me and him both find being in a church/etc funny... I can't help it =/

We laugh at Weddings taking place in those buildings. I try and shut myself up best as possible, but his laughing starts my laughing.

 

[Kurokami]

Never laugh loudly. Never.

Been there, done that.

"Hahah..."

Everyone looked at me and I'm just like "Oh, I was remembering somethi-Sorry..." (and at that point its pretty much impossible to stop laughing)

 

[Hawk of Battle]

"Ba ba dum, dum, dum, another bites the dust..."

Alternatively;

"Ah ah ah ah, stayin' alive, stayin' alive!"

 

[thenumberthirteen]

"God I've got a hard on the size of that coffin"

Courtesy of Green Wing

 

[monkey_man]

"you are next, buddy"

 

[Dr. HeatSync]

I can't believe no one's mentioned the Giggle Loop. We have examples, but not how it actually works:

<youtube=-iKjkPgVQcE>

 

[ultimateownage]

"You know, I tapped that."

 

[SimuLord]

I would not have been able to resist the "dying to get in here" joke. You have far more self-control than I do.

Do NOT say "I bet (name of deceased) is looking up at us with approval right now."

 

[Uberpig]

"Who died and made you king?"

 

[EeveeElectro]

The last funeral I went to, I had to suppress laughter because they played 'I never promised you a rose garden.' I didn't know it was an original song and had only heard The Suicide Machines punk version. I really had the urge to play it on my phone as we were walking out, but managed to control myself.

 

[Mr Pantomime]

Platypus. I dont think thats ever appropriate to say at a funeral.

 

[Mana Fiend]

Do not stand up and announce, loudly, the following:

"Well I'm bored. The atmosphere here...

*put on sunglasses*

"Is dead."

YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[raecor14]

teabag the boady

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

[HEADING=2]"Great person, he (or she) will be missed... Where's the food?"[/HEADING]

is all i've got to say
EDIT: I don't know how to embed movies or pitures.

Spoiler: Click here for help!

For youtube do this: [pootube=whatever is behind the equals sign in the url for the video]

Replacing poo for you, obviously.

For images right click the image, hit copy image location then do this.

[ img] blah blah blah [/img]

(no space for the first , I just did that so I could show you.)

I hope that makes sense to you![/spoiler]

 

[Fanta Grape]

The corpse is a spy.

 

[KurtzGallahad]

When looking at a badly maimed corpse
"Well, who ordered pizza?
I could sure go for a slice!"

 

[Antitonic]

"You know, he/she liked me the best."

"Yeah yeah, we've all seen the body. When's the will reading?"

"Oh god! I hope they don't do that bad of a job on me when I die!"

"So... when do the strippers get here again?"

Also, do not insist the deceased is just playing an elaborate joke on you, and force them out of the coffin.