This Coffee Maker Has DRM to Lock Out Competitor's Refills - Update

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Kapol

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May 2, 2010
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Neronium said:
We actually have that machine in our shop at SDSU. Reason is because everyone gets in at 5-6am and the only coffee on campus is overpriced Starbucks. They enjoy the machine really, and I will say it makes some good hot chocolate. :3
Also this technically isn't DRM, since DRM stands for Digital Rights Management. If anything this is CRM, Coffee Rights Management.
Also to be fair, there can be a decent argument made for DRM. Namely, the idea is to stop/reduce piracy. Which I think is a fine idea. I think Steam is fine (not good, but fine) DRM.

This seems more like what Nintendo did back in the early days with the 'Nintendo certified.' But that also had the excuse of being for 'quality control.' This is just Kuerig saying 'hey, we're the dominant coffee-machine company now. Let's use our power to get more money and lock our competitors out.'
 

ThunderCavalier

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Nov 21, 2009
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I saw this headline earlier, but I thought it was satire or some kind of cheeky, self-aware product that's mocking DRM.

I didn't think that someone would be crazy enough to actually do this. And for COFFEE, no less.
 

Saulkar

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Steven Bogos said:
Update: Keurig has responded to the widespread negative feedback regarding this change, assuring fans that "It's critical for performance and safety reasons that our new system includes this technology." Safety reasons. That's a good one.

Source: Tech Dirt [http://www.techdirt.com/articles/20140305/14561626447/keurig-insists-coffee-drm-brings-interactive-enabled-benefits-is-your-own-safety.shtml]
Holy Shit. How stupid do they think we are, I mean, there are probably some pretty stupid people but it is a fricken coffee maker for waffle's sake! What kind of safety precautions do you need besides large pretty pictures that say "Don't Fucking Touch This, Hot Stuff!"?!
 

Genocidicles

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Steven Bogos said:
Update: Keurig has responded to the widespread negative feedback regarding this change, assuring fans that "It's critical for performance and safety reasons that our new system includes this technology."
Wow it's almost as if EA was handling their press release.

This idea needs to die before it becomes the norm.
 

Adam Jensen_v1legacy

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Sep 8, 2011
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This should be illegal. In fact, I'm pretty sure it is illegal under most European consumer protection laws.

Only in America would those greedy corporate assholes think that they can have the freedom to do something like this. The Corporate States of Let's Fuck the Consumers strikes again.

Safety reasons sounds dangerously close to "national security reasons". See a pattern there? Every time someone powerful wants to stick a dick up your ass they'll claim that it's for your own safety.
 

BeerTent

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May 8, 2011
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Safety reasons. That's a good one.
Safety reasons? Really... I've got a feeling I've heard this one before...
"We're going to lock half of your workstation. Safety reasons."
"We're going to remove a quarter of your apartment to repair your deck. Safety reasons."
"We're not giving you a discount on any of this. Safety reasons."
"We're increasing the price of your electricity. Safety reasons."
"You can't rent from us unless you have our apartment insurance. Safety reasons."
"You must ride your bike in a crowded street, no bike lane. Safety reasons."
"We're forcing you to buy our product, and only our product. Safety reasons."

Nah... I'm just paranoid.
 

ReinWeisserRitter

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Nov 15, 2011
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The sad thing is this is going to work to some extent, particularly on the office end of things, because as we all know, every office thinks coffee is mandatory. The average user might find brand-locked machines to be bullshit, and it is, but corporate gophers aren't hired for their brains; they're hired to do what they're told, and if the coffee machine says "put this kind of coffee in", that's what they're going to do, because the budget intended for the coffee machine has been spent already.

There are, as you may know, a lot of offices in the world. This has depressing potential to become a big thing, with further potential for manufacturers to pursue exclusive deals with their end-users' companies, and it's not going to stop at coffee if it takes off.
 

Olas

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Dec 24, 2011
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"It's critical for performance and safety reasons that our new system includes this technology."
I'd love to hear them explain EXACTLY how that is the case. I want to hear them explain the fucking DETAILS man! It would probably be hilarious.

infinity_turtles said:
...Jail broken coffee makers may end up being a thing. Cyberpunk future here we come.
But then you wouldn't be safe? You want to be safe don't you?
 

FoolKiller

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Feb 8, 2008
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Jorec said:
So what's to stop people from just using the original Keurig machines then? If that's the only substantial thing that the "Keurig 2.0" offers than I see no point in upgrading honestly, especially if the competitor's refills are in fact cheaper.
More importantly, what if one likes the other coffee better?

I can't wait till Sony blurays only play Sony Studios movies... because that is where this logic would lead. :S
 

Aggieknight

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Dec 6, 2009
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Saulkar said:
Steven Bogos said:
Update: Keurig has responded to the widespread negative feedback regarding this change, assuring fans that "It's critical for performance and safety reasons that our new system includes this technology." Safety reasons. That's a good one.

Source: Tech Dirt [http://www.techdirt.com/articles/20140305/14561626447/keurig-insists-coffee-drm-brings-interactive-enabled-benefits-is-your-own-safety.shtml]
Holy Shit. How stupid do they think we are, I mean, there are probably some pretty stupid people but it is a fricken coffee maker for waffle's sake! What kind of safety precautions do you need besides large pretty pictures that say "Don't Fucking Touch This, Hot Stuff!"?!
Very stupid, apparently.

I am pretty sure that I've only ever bought Keurig approved coffee pods, but...
1. I'm not sure what would improve on the current product. It makes fantastic coffee, 1 cup at a time.
2. DRM makes this a pass for me anyway.
 

Fulbert

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Jan 15, 2009
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They've got to be using DRM unless they want to be driven out of business by coffee pirates, I guess...

Well anyway, I've never heard of this Keuring brand, but I'll keep this DRM thing in mind if I ever consider purchasing their products.
 

mysecondlife

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Feb 24, 2011
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Big_Willie_Styles said:
mysecondlife said:
I have a Keurig. Mine just punctures a hole top and bottom of the coffee pod and it pours hot water. Haven't got a clue how they managed it.
The shape of the pod, which would be very easy to jerry rig to fuck over competitors. Who are dicks anyway for trying to steal from their market. This is just a response to them being dicks to them.

If a company came out with an HD disc that was able to play in Blu Ray players but wasn't a Blu Ray disc, you gotta know Sony would intervene.
Then competitors can easily replicate the shape of the pod.

and its a stupid analogy. Sony doesn't make money off of all the blu-ray disc sales nor they are the only manufacturer of blu-ray players.
 

rasputin0009

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Feb 12, 2013
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Those Keurig machines are pretty popular among my family. They're really handy if you only want one or two cups of coffee instantly. The downsides are that they are terrible to clean, inefficient for large groups, breakdown easily, and the pods are expensive as fuck ($0.60-$1.00 a cup). The cheaper, no-name brand coffee pods make them more economically viable, but if you're buying a Keurig, then that shouldn't be a problem (Co-op Gold brand coffee pods make my piss feel like razor blades, though).

I don't see anything wrong with this business practice, since it's their machine and they're not requiring anything obtrusive from the customer. Calling it 'DRM' is silly.
 

truckspond

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Oct 26, 2013
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I can already see a method to bypass this DRM: Attach the RFID chip that would be in the pod to facilitate the DRM to a generic reusable pod (Make sure to use good waterproof tape!) and just use that.
 

Infernal Lawyer

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Jan 28, 2013
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Considering someone already said "bet this doesn't go as big as the Xbone DRM kerfuffle", this is looking like a very similar situation. I mean, they've actually out and said "Oh don't worry, this is actually a good thing, we're just not going to explain why", just like Microsoft did when we asked why the hell the box needed to phone home every day.

Thank god I don't care for caffeine, then.
 

Sarge034

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Feb 24, 2011
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Steven Bogos said:
"It's critical for performance and safety reasons that our new system includes this technology."
How the fuck am I still alive? I mean I was using a pot that could utilize any brand I desired... How did the thing not blow up or catch fire?

You heard 'em gents, we can now classify non-DRM coffee pots at "deadly weapons".
 

blackrave

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Mar 7, 2012
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Adam Jensen said:
Safety reasons sounds dangerously close to "national security reasons". See a pattern there? Every time someone powerful wants to stick a dick up your ass they'll claim that it's for your own safety.
But it IS for your safety
If your ass is filled by bunch of dicks, nobody can assrape you anymore.
So be a good drone now and say "thank you" to your overlords
 

FalloutJack

Bah weep grah nah neep ninny bom
Nov 20, 2008
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Steven Bogos said:
Update: Keurig has responded to the widespread negative feedback regarding this change, assuring fans that "It's critical for performance and safety reasons that our new system includes this technology." Safety reasons. That's a good one.
Wow, we've never heard anything like that here! Like from anyone who favors DRM or tries to justify bricking a device of any sort for any reason at all! No, never!

*Laughs*

I DID say people would reject this in droves because they want their goddamn coffee, and I was right!
 

Infernal Lawyer

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Jan 28, 2013
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FalloutJack said:
Steven Bogos said:
Update: Keurig has responded to the widespread negative feedback regarding this change, assuring fans that "It's critical for performance and safety reasons that our new system includes this technology." Safety reasons. That's a good one.
Wow, we've never heard anything like that here! Like from anyone who favors DRM or tries to justify bricking a device of any sort for any reason at all! No, never!

*Laughs*

I DID say people would reject this in droves because they want their goddamn coffee, and I was right!
Wait, what?

I understand someone claiming that DRM actually stops piracy (I mean, that IS what it's technically designed for), but since when did anyone claim DRM affects performance or system compatibility in the slightest?

Oh. Wait. Are you talking about cloud computing?
 

Strazdas

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May 28, 2011
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Saulkar said:
Steven Bogos said:
Update: Keurig has responded to the widespread negative feedback regarding this change, assuring fans that "It's critical for performance and safety reasons that our new system includes this technology." Safety reasons. That's a good one.

Source: Tech Dirt [http://www.techdirt.com/articles/20140305/14561626447/keurig-insists-coffee-drm-brings-interactive-enabled-benefits-is-your-own-safety.shtml]
Holy Shit. How stupid do they think we are, I mean, there are probably some pretty stupid people but it is a fricken coffee maker for waffle's sake! What kind of safety precautions do you need besides large pretty pictures that say "Don't Fucking Touch This, Hot Stuff!"?!
considering they thought it was a good idea to begin with, i think they think were pretty stupid.

mysecondlife said:
and its a stupid analogy. Sony doesn't make money off of all the blu-ray disc sales nor they are the only manufacturer of blu-ray players.
except, that it does
http://news.cnet.com/8301-10784_3-9874317-7.html

It gets royalties on every Blue-ray drive and somethig along 1.5 cents for every disc sold. They license out the right to manufacture discs.

FoolKiller said:
I can't wait till Sony blurays only play Sony Studios movies... because that is where this logic would lead. :S
Well, Sony tried that with DVDs. Nintendo suceeded [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nintendo_optical_discs]. and there is also regionlocking which is equally stupid.
then again there is peopel complaining about exactly that problem [http://www.avsforum.com/t/1448485/samsung-3d-dvd-players-not-playing-certain-movies-please-read]


Infernal Lawyer said:
I understand someone claiming that DRM actually stops piracy (I mean, that IS what it's technically designed for), but since when did anyone claim DRM affects performance or system compatibility in the slightest?

Oh. Wait. Are you talking about cloud computing?
is that sarcasm? please tell me it is sarcasm.
Of course DRM affect performance. from baisc bloatware sitting there eating resources to things like SecuRom malfunctioning and locking you out of the game completely. Oh, and lets not forget Games for Windows Live actually deletign your saves if you connect to them wrongly.