it's got nothing to do with the army wanting to tell anybody what to do. The army isn't saying, "you can't have this" they're saying "we won't sell this". There's a big difference there. The army feels it has a moral obligation to not support anything that features something so very strikingly real and painful for so many men and women in uniform (or their families). It's not about control, but about respect, for the dead, and for those who are about to see combat, against the VERY real taliban.
You say, "well, didn't mw2 do the same thing", and i'll say to you that neither game in the series hit this close to home. They used fictional organizations, and fictional characters. The taliban is real, the murder, rape, and mutilation they've carried out is real, and the military said that they don't want something that allows players to step into the shoes of an organization that has DIRECTLY CONTRIBUTED TO THE LOSS OF U.S., ALLIED AND AFGHAN LIVES. They see it as a slap in the face.