Unconventional Weapons
- Thread starter Hikikomori Ookami
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well at my work theres an over-sized spud masher. nice and heavy with a long and chunky wooden handle.
home... just chuck my pc at them its so damn huge. now seriously... um i have a large collection of empty beer bottles in my room, the lagers have a very good neck for grasping..
home... just chuck my pc at them its so damn huge. now seriously... um i have a large collection of empty beer bottles in my room, the lagers have a very good neck for grasping..
Does a crowbar count? There's also hammer, pieces of timber, shit i'd even just hit them with a chair. Most people can't keep moving after you them with a chair. And even they could, it'd knock em down for long enough to step on their necks.
I see all kinds of weapons looking around this room. Wire hangers, both a large and a small lamp, my non-working laptop, my scale, and a shit-ton of empty and nearly empty liquor bottles. Nothing in here could beat an opponent with a gun, but I'd feel pretty confident if I was taking on a human with a cutting weapon.
I'm gonna go with a deodorant can.
You can spray it in their eyes... or use it as a flamethrower.
You can spray it in their eyes... or use it as a flamethrower.
I would say a Hockey stick (long and made for hitting stuff). Alternatively, I have a faulty CO and Gas alarm nearby. It has a short meaning it finds non-existent harmful substances. Plug it in and run.
I could kill you with a piece of f---ing toast. White toast even, not just the whole wheat with the scratchy grains in it.Berethond said:
That said, of the things I would use in my room as a weapon, I would probably go straight to the folding knife I keep in my desk, followed by ethernet cables (for strangling), plastic grocery bags (for suffocating), a tea cup (you seen Riddick? that thing wasn't even ceramic), and hairspray + zippo lighter (if you need to figure out what I'm doing with that, you fail... badly).
Then again, the knife just seems a bit more direct.
Any of my assorted toys- G.I. Joe vehicles, transformers, etc- would make pretty decent bludgeoning weapons. Apart from that, my paintball gun; Shoot 'em in the knees, torso, groin, eyes, etc., then bludgeon them.
Alternately I could sneak up on them and jam a screwdriver through their ear.
But when all else fails and practicality trumps style or stealth, use the golden standard: the croquet mallet I keep under my bed just in case such a situation arises. Decent reach, great force to a small area, and light and fast to strike repeatedly.
Alternately I could sneak up on them and jam a screwdriver through their ear.
But when all else fails and practicality trumps style or stealth, use the golden standard: the croquet mallet I keep under my bed just in case such a situation arises. Decent reach, great force to a small area, and light and fast to strike repeatedly.
Hikikomori Ookami said:
This thing.
It's a small picture, so let me explain.
It's a metal cartridge for soda machines, I always have some in my apartment.
These things are about 30 to 35 centimetres long and very heavy for their size.
The perfect bat-substitution.
The question is, would I use an empty one for safety or just grab a full one for lack of time (what if it breaks open?)?
Petrol from your car or garage and a cigarette lighter anybody?
Wine bottle; smash it over their head and then set the wine on fire. Perfect, right?
Or power cords, pens, speakers, clocks, chairs, books, cd's/dvd's, anything hot in the kitchen, guard dog, anything glass, golf clubs, towels to strangle with, brooms, TV or PC screens, shoes, teddy bears, pillows, anything and everything.
Edit: Plastic bags would be a big one if you could get around behind them and take 'em out Manhunt style.
Wine bottle; smash it over their head and then set the wine on fire. Perfect, right?
Or power cords, pens, speakers, clocks, chairs, books, cd's/dvd's, anything hot in the kitchen, guard dog, anything glass, golf clubs, towels to strangle with, brooms, TV or PC screens, shoes, teddy bears, pillows, anything and everything.
Edit: Plastic bags would be a big one if you could get around behind them and take 'em out Manhunt style.
Yes, the founding fathers gave us the right to bear arms and I sue that right. Rawr!fuzzball said:
I'd take the nozzle out of the vacuum, its made of metal and has a built in handguard. Sort of..Otherwise I'd use my bass guitar, thats bloody heavy!
Problem is, what counts as unconventional? Aside from firearms, I have three axes in my house. You probably won't find them in quite a few households, but I would take an axe above any baseball bat or hockey stick. Thinking about it, most household items wouldn't make decent weapons. You've got plates and lamps, which when they shatter wouldn't cause fatal damage to the attacker, and you would risk shredding your hand. Kitchen knives make sense, assuming you can get to the kitchen to grab one. Most objects designed for utilitarian use are either too heavy to wield as a weapon or too light to do much damage.
And Tacticalassassin1, wine isn't flammable. You would need a liquid which is at least 40% ethyl alcohol (80 proof) to be flammable. Wine is usually around 12% alcohol by volume. Even at 80 proof burning is finicky. Whiskey at 80 proof doesn't flame as readily as Vodka. If you're really planning on using a bottle of booze for self defense, get a bottle of everclear.
And Tacticalassassin1, wine isn't flammable. You would need a liquid which is at least 40% ethyl alcohol (80 proof) to be flammable. Wine is usually around 12% alcohol by volume. Even at 80 proof burning is finicky. Whiskey at 80 proof doesn't flame as readily as Vodka. If you're really planning on using a bottle of booze for self defense, get a bottle of everclear.
