Unskippable: Transformers: War for Cybertron

[LeeshaJoy]

Though come to think of it, how many females do we ever see? There was what, ONE in Beast Wars? I mean, I understand that they don't reproduce sexually, but there weren't any more robots who wanted to be hot chick robots?! Something's wrong there. Maybe that was what the war was about: the Autobots made all the Decepticons turn male, thus Megatron's desire to return them to their "glory" or whatever. Okay, this has gotten too silly.

My understanding is that Cybertronians are completely genderless, and it's only we humans who label them as "male" or "female." But that's mostly the opinion of my TF-nerd friends rather than actual canon.

 

[BlackIronGuardian]

More like metal surgery.

Amiright?

 

[Snotnarok]

How did Spike get on Cybertron?! ...*waits for no one to get the awful joke*

 

[KingKronus]

They should do Dead Rising for next week!!
That would be perfect because of Dead Rising 2 coming out next tuesday

 

[zeratul123]

Really funny i also agree with alot of things you say.

 

[shogunblade]

Never has an intro theme fit the game's visuals so appropriately then that of Transformers: War for Cybertron.

That was a pretty good laugh this time around (What am I talking about? They are all good) and it does seem like Megatron's face was made to always frown, it seems.

 

[TheSchaef]

OK, so now that we've gotten the improbable exposition validating giant melees leading up to the cryptic scene-ending giant explosion that leaves the fate of both sides in question, it's time for Unskippable to follow this up with the (cinematic) trailer to DC Universe Online. It's the next logical step.

Having said that, I am calling early dibs on the line "And so Kal-El threw himself from the highest mountain in all of Krypton."

 

[someotherguy]

Good job. I find the cutscene funny, why am I supposed to feel sorry for robots?

 

[emeraldrafael]

Question. Now, they covered about them not knowing what a bumble bee is. but when the robots get to earth, they have to scan something so they know what the transform into. If they're on their planet.... how do they know already what to transform into? Did they go to another planet and cause the same shit to go down that they did on Earth?

 

[Android2137]

When the entire civilization is robots, it brings up interesting questions. How did these robots come to be? Were there biological life forms that built them? And were they all killed off in the resulting wars? And the entire planet mechanized? If the highways can build itself, then does that mean that the entire planet is a transformer or just the roads? Also, if you're flying in a spaceship to a space station, is that spaceship a transformer? Is there any non-sentient robot on that planet? Am I making things overcomplicated?

Robot bodies were created by Cybertron, and given personalities by a mega-computer called Vector Sigma that resides deep within Cybertron.

Cybertron itself is a slumbering Transformer called Primus, who is perceived as the God of Light (with on the opposite side, Unicron, a huge ass robot that also transforms into a planet). Primus and Unicron battled it out for eons, until they were both exhausted and forced into a stasis-lock. To defend itself against threats, Primus created the Transformers to maintain and defend his slumbering planet form. This was before there were Autobots or Decepticon factions.

As I mentioned earlier, the Transformers were given personalities (or sparks) by Vector Sigma, an ancient version of the Matrix (that each Prime carries in his chest). In time the Transformers evolved on their own and gained alternate forms. There are non-sentient robots, they are referred to as Drones who are basically like the robots we use to build cars. Simple maintenance duty.
As far as spacecrafts and shuttles, not all Transformers can fly (the Autobots cannot fly in robot form, only the Decepticons can) and more importantly, spaceshuttles get you to places faster and allows you to bring items with you.

So yes, the entire planet is a Transformer, in fact, it can also function as a planet-sized ship but that's not possible at the moment, because it requires too much Energon (their fuel).

Sorry for this nerdy explanation.

...Unfortunately, this just opens a new plethora of questions. How did Primus and Unicron come to be in the first place? Someone must have built and programmed them!

 

[MaxFan]

"That's why you don't bring a laser to a larger laser fight."

Awesome.

 

[Mydnyght]

So Dark Energon... it's not black, but it glows very...darkly? Okay, I think I understand, Paul.

And wow. No wonder Megatron is such an asshole. Too much bad botox.

 

[JSW]

"I should have never gotten that plastic surgery" made my day xD

Yeah, he should'a held out for die-cast surgery. Then again, it's a lost art.

And the reason why the Cybertronian Green Party never gets any votes is that they keep yammering on about the "seeds of the future" rather than actually establishing a firm platform.

When the entire civilization is robots, it brings up interesting questions. How did these robots come to be? Were there biological life forms that built them?

According to the cartoon, they were built by the Quintessons and subsequently rebelled. According to the comics, they were built by the robot god Primus to be his warriors against the chaos-bringer Unicron. The comic origin tends to be the more widely accepted one these days.

And were they all killed off in the resulting wars?

The Quintessons were driven from Cybertron, but they would come back centuries later to attempt to reclaim their property.

And the entire planet mechanized?

According to the comics, the planet Cybertron is in fact Primus's body and could, theoretically at least, awaken and change into a giant robot. According to the cartoon continuity, the planet was once host to organic life (and, centuries after the war between the Autobots and Decepticons ended, would be again.)

If the highways can build itself, then does that mean that the entire planet is a transformer or just the roads?

Yes. See the bit about Primus above.

Also, if you're flying in a spaceship to a space station, is that spaceship a transformer?

Sometimes.

Is there any non-sentient robot on that planet?

There are drones, yes.

Am I making things overcomplicated?

No. Bob Budiansky, David Wise, Simon Furman, Bob Forward, Larry DiTillo and Bob Skir beat you to that by a good few decades.

...Unfortunately, this just opens a new plethora of questions. How did Primus and Unicron come to be in the first place? Someone must have built and programmed them!

Unicron was built by an alien monkey called Primacron. Primus's origins remain a mystery.

 

[Soviet Heavy]

Is that Narrator the starts about halfway through Cyrus from Dawn of War 2?

Either that or Spike Spiegel. His name is Steve Blum, and he's done dozens of voice overs for video games and Anime shows.

How did Spike get on Cybertron?! ...*waits for no one to get the awful joke*

I got it. I hope that the Bebop made it past Megatron okay.

 

[Waif]

I never noticed that story inconsistencies before, lol! Not like that matters though, still looks cool enough ^~^! Still not sure about getting this game, I might get it, but, yeah...

 

[Vohn_exel]

Is that Narrator the starts about halfway through Cyrus from Dawn of War 2?

Yeah, it's Steven Blum, he's Barricade too, and Jack Slate in D2R Retribution.

(Edited a typo)

Yes, Steven Blum is to everything what Nolan North is to gaming. (He was even in a 7-11 commercial!)

OT: LOL that was pretty good. I never had any real want to play this game because their history never interested me that much. I like it much better when they're on earth and transforming into our cars and tanks,ect.

 

[Something Amyss]

Decepticons weren't evil until they changed their OS to DROID. I told you Google couldn't be trusted.

 

[jimClassic]

I'm not gonna lie, this wasn't one of your best ones, but it was okay. I was amused, regardless.

 

[Hatchet90]

God Transformers is stupid.

 

[DanHibiki]

When the entire civilization is robots, it brings up interesting questions. How did these robots come to be? Were there biological life forms that built them? And were they all killed off in the resulting wars? And the entire planet mechanized? If the highways can build itself, then does that mean that the entire planet is a transformer or just the roads? Also, if you're flying in a spaceship to a space station, is that spaceship a transformer? Is there any non-sentient robot on that planet? Am I making things overcomplicated?

Oh come on! Those three faced alien squid build autobots and decepticons as slaves, but they rebelled and took over cybertron and then went to war with each other.