Vader Wants You to Know: Obi-Wan is Dead

[roguewriter]

Have to admit, that is pretty freaking clever. Kudos and well done, sir.

 

[Metal Brother]

Bullshit! Where's the frakkin' body?!

[small]seriously, how did no one beat me to that joke?[/small]

Take a look at the "comments" on the news page itself. They're even better than the article.

 

[FalloutJack]

And he too was in the last place they expected to find him! Hilarious.

 

[nagato]

I can only hope that this will finally put to rest the ugly rumors that Lord Vader is a 'secret Jedi', but I'm not holding my breath. Did you know that there are those who claim, with a completely straight face, that Vader was a student of Obi Wan! These people are about as 'credible' as those idiots who claim that Yoda isn't dead and is hiding out in a shack on a backwoods swamp planet... Yeah, sure.

 

[BrownGaijin]

For all those who suffered at the wrath of Obi-Wan, I dedicate this song. Here's to some closure.

 

[BehattedWanderer]

Solid Imperial Gold, right there.

 

[rickynumber24]

The site is a pretty clever piece of satire, <a href=http://www.networksolutions.com/whois-search/galacticempiretimes.com>apparently created by Robert Grossman of Robert Scott Art in New York. Hopefully he'll do a follow-up piece where Vader addresses conspiracy theories about the news; you know, the ones where people say the story was made up to distract from his fake birth certificate.

I believe the droids you're looking for (apologies) are actually the following conspiracy theory:
The story was made up to distract from allegations that Lord Vader is, in fact, more machine than man. I don't expect those allegations will be laid to rest until he produces a certificate that he saved his son from Emperor Palpatine.

 

[scorptatious]

Obi Wan isn't really dead! This is all just a conspiracy made by the empire!

 

[zander93]

Obi-Wan can't be dead
The force is with him

 

[Vrach]

/hatoff

Fuckin' A. I only wish they did a full Obama speech mockup video.

 

[internetzealot1]

Instantly favorited.

 

[twm1709]

The site is a pretty clever piece of satire, apparently created by Robert Grossman of Robert Scott Art in New York. Hopefully he'll do a follow-up piece where Vader addresses conspiracy theories about the news; you know, the ones where people say the story was made up to distract from his fake birth certificate.

Well, he WAS conceived by midichlorians right?

 

[WaReloaded]

This has made my day, it really has.

 

[MoNKeyYy]

Bullshit! Where's the frakkin' body?!

[small]seriously, how did no one beat me to that joke?[/small]

This explains everything!!! There's no body because Osama vanished into the netherworld of the Force when he was shot and now he's more powerful than we could possibly imagine!!! It's all so simple!!!

 

[Nimcha]

That was amazing. The comment section is just the icing on the cake.

 

[Irony's Acolyte]

Tch.
Coverup. They didn't nab all of Obi's cohorts. I bet they'll have some guy as bad, or worse come up and want to avenge him or something.

Oh, quit being paranoid.

A farm boy from Tatooine managing a successful attack on something as heavily armoured as the Death Star? Who'd be dumb enough to believe that?

While I'll admit that the Death Star probably isn't in any danger of being destroyed anytime soon, especially from those blasted Rebels, I still think the whole project was unnecessary. This is a terrorist organization, not an invading force. We don't need something that big or expensive made, when we could instead buy more ships for the Imperial Fleet.

Still glad they got the Jedi bastard. Hopefully this will help to end this whole conflict on the Outer Rim and our boys in white can come home finally.