Well, I'm gonna burst your bubble. Pleasure played in this first session too, although it's difficult for me to really enjoy myself with others because I waited too long to become sexually active. I stay aroused longer than most men without being able to achieve release.
She told me before the session that my interests can inform my experience, but recommended not going in with a checklist in my head, because that would mean not really relinquishing control. I was so worried about doing something wrong, until she explained in that email that I couldn't. That she would give me guidance and correction and, if needed, a firmer hand. Struggling and making mistakes is just a part of the experience, she said. My only job was to please her. Not having expectations definitely helped too. I stopped having these nervous shakes after that email. (But they returned about twenty minutes before.)
Before I left the dungeon, she asked if I wanted some treats. I declined and then had a big case of the munchies on my way home. Ate twenty dollars worth of McDonalds, where I normally never go, and bought a bag of Jolly Ranchers. Didn't think extreme submission would give me such a sugar crash.
