What if...

[Jedamethis]

...furniture was self aware?

Ever read the Xanth novels?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xanth

One of the characters has the power to talk with inanimate objects... and most of the time they just insult him.

Hmm. No I haven't, but perhaps I shall soon...

 

[Hashime]

My chair would kill its self as I enjoy my baked beans...

 

[Jedoro]

My mattress would wonder why my ex and I did more on the couch than on it. And then my couch would be pissed that I started making out with girls on my mattress instead.

 

[Jedamethis]

So when did you start getting high, Jeda? ;p

Ever since I had the money.

...

So several years in the future...

imgsnip
GREAT SCOTT!

Nah, but where & how've ya been?

Not in the Forum games section, and doing fine! This forum hasn't had enough meaningless fun lately, so I made this.

 

[Jedamethis]

My mattress would wonder why my ex and I did more on the couch than on it. And then my couch would be pissed that I started making out with girls on my mattress instead.

???

Do you move downstairs partway through?

 

[Jedoro]

My mattress would wonder why my ex and I did more on the couch than on it. And then my couch would be pissed that I started making out with girls on my mattress instead.

???

Do you move downstairs partway through?

It's a one-story house, but no. We'd start and finish on the couch when no one was home, and when someone was we'd go in my room and watch movies. My mom had this rule about keeping our doors open when our significant other was over.

 

[Korten12]

I would be afraid to sit down. 0.o

 

[Jedamethis]

Then I'd laugh maniacally as my couch tries desperately to get me to stop sitting on it.

Rather easy to ignore it's attempt, considering the lack of arms, hmm?

 

[-Samurai-]

I think I would have scarred my couch for life....

 

[phoenix352]

i see no problem with this situation... my furniture doesn't have eyes or lips or organs of any kind to express this new found sense of awareness which would make them look and feel like regular furniture so it wouldn't bother me the slightest.

as for the furniture... well too bad.

 

[EMFCRACKSHOT]

my sofa would hate me for the amount of times I've farted on it. Hell, whenever you fart you basically fart on your sofas you basically fart on their faces.

 

[Gigaguy64]

You reminded me of that scene from Pajama Sam... If you know the one I'm talking about, I love you.

And if they were, I would certainly have some explaining to do, I could tell you that much.

I could never figure out how to get the Damn couch off of whatever it was that i needed.

 

[WrongSprite]

I'd never, ever let my computer chair near my parents in that case.

 

[WrongSprite]

i see no problem with this situation... my furniture doesn't have eyes or lips or organs of any kind to express this new found sense of awareness which would make them look and feel like regular furniture so it wouldn't bother me the slightest.

as for the furniture... well too bad.

This proves that furniture could well be self aware. We just haven't realised.

 

[PoliceBox63]

My bed and I would have one awkward relationship.

 

[PureChaos]

the stories my chair could tell.

 

[Chicago Ted]

I'd kill my furniture then have it stuffed.

 

[Jedamethis]

I'd kill my furniture then have it stuffed.

I tip my hat to you Chicago Ted.

 

[Chicago Ted]

I'd kill my furniture then have it stuffed.

I tip my hat to you Chicago Ted.

Why thank you, to every problem, a solution, no?

 

[Darth Pope]

Hmmmm, that could be a problem. I keep my stash of Parmesan and Garlic Cheeze Its under my bed...