What's it like having 2 parents?

[Syzygy23]

Warning wall of text
Short version: What's it like having 2 parents? I don't
Also feel free to ask any questions you want to someone who didn't have a dad.

So growing up my dad was only in the picture the first 3 years of my life.
And even then he never really did any parent duties, he just sort of terrorized the family (and still does sometimes when he's not in jail)
So I was raised by just my mom.

We went through ups and downs, we lived in the hood, we lived in a suburban house for a couple years thanks to Section 8 housing (government program) and a lot of places in between.
For a few years my mom had a boyfriend but he was like my dad only I had even less of a connection with him and he never contributed, just took our money.

But anyway, I only had my mom.
I had to learn a lot of things myself because, well some things moms dont teach.
I really love my mom and feel she's a great mother I just sometimes wonder what it's like having 2 parents and I feel it'd be to weird to ask anyone I know.

You're either missing out on everything or missing out on nothing. From your description, the father you would have had would have been immature and/or potentially abusive. Trust me, better to have NO father figure than a terrible one. At least with a lack of a father figure, you get to look for your own.

 

[Darth_Dude]

It's awful. There are twice the people to nag you and fuck you over at every opportunity. Just this christmas, I wanted an iPad from my Dad and a Blackberry from my Mum, and all I got was an iPod and a car. Fuck parents.

Not sure if serious.......

You sound like a spoilt brat...

OP: Its...a mixed bag, my parents fight alot so sometimes life gets a bit unbearable. But having both means you get to experience both sides, the loving mum and disciplinary father, to smack you when you get out of line

 

[SageRuffin]

It's awful. There are twice the people to nag you and fuck you over at every opportunity. Just this christmas, I wanted an iPad from my Dad and a Blackberry from my Mum, and all I got was an iPod and a car. Fuck parents.

Not sure if serious.......

You sound like a spoilt brat...

I know tone can be hard to discern on the interwebz, but that sounds like rather obvious sarcasm to me.

On-topic: Like a handful of others, I can't answer that. My dad was incarcerated for most of my life growing up and as far as I'm concerned, his side of my lineage is behind me. And so that left me with my mom. Times were silky smooth in some areas, rough as sandpaper in many others, but that's how you grow as a person, right? Overcoming hardship and turning out better for it.

Honestly, I don't know what life would've been like with both my mom and dad... probably a wreck considering what my dad was incarcerated for and he was creeping at the time of my incubation (I have a sister who's 5 months younger than I am). Ugh... I don't wanna think about it...

 

[Dunkerloop]

I've lived with only one parent before for a long string of time- When my family was moving from the UK to Western US, because of several complications I was living with only my dad for almost 2 years before my Mom was truly able to get everything done that she needed to.

 

[emeraldrafael]

wouldnt know, i was raised primarily by my mom.

...

well, I mean, I ugess I would. my dad got me on weekends/special events and if he wanted me early he could if he talked to my mom about it. its not that they hate each other, just they end up bringing out the worst of each other.

But i asked a friend who's had both parents and after he gloated for a while about how good it was and then I popped his balloon with how his mother was the town whore who decided over the course of 30 years decided to have 7 different affairs, he said its a different dynamic, and that you can rely on two different perspectives. Over all, he said both parents have more patience, but he still strains both of them to the point of braeking anyway.

 

[Wintermoot]

It's awful. There are twice the people to nag you and fuck you over at every opportunity. Just this christmas, I wanted an iPad from my Dad and a Blackberry from my Mum, and all I got was an iPod and a car. Fuck parents.

please tell me you are sarcastic....
OT
I don,t really know how to compare it to a single parent household.

 

[michael87cn]

Warning wall of text
Short version: What's it like having 2 parents? I don't
Also feel free to ask any questions you want to someone who didn't have a dad.

So growing up my dad was only in the picture the first 3 years of my life.
And even then he never really did any parent duties, he just sort of terrorized the family (and still does sometimes when he's not in jail)
So I was raised by just my mom.

We went through ups and downs, we lived in the hood, we lived in a suburban house for a couple years thanks to Section 8 housing (government program) and a lot of places in between.
For a few years my mom had a boyfriend but he was like my dad only I had even less of a connection with him and he never contributed, just took our money.

But anyway, I only had my mom.
I had to learn a lot of things myself because, well some things moms dont teach.
I really love my mom and feel she's a great mother I just sometimes wonder what it's like having 2 parents and I feel it'd be to weird to ask anyone I know.

Its different for everyone as every parent is a different person.

Some people are better off with just 1 parent because they have a good parent. Some people are worse off with 2 parents because they're bad parents. It really depends on the people in question.

I have 2 parents, I will say nothing more or less than that as my personal life is private.

 

[bojackx]

Even though my parents were together until I was 13 (I'm 18 now), I still can't give you much of a useful answer.

The only differences that are really that significant is that you have two places where you live (unless one of the parents is like how you described) and you HAVE to get to know the random new partners that the parents get.

Even now, my Dad got a girlfriend about 6 months ago and I'm still not comfortable around her, but that's not really on-topic.

But anyway, living with two parents wasn't really that different for me considering they never really got all lovey and cuddly towards each other. Yet I was still really surprised when they seperated.

 

[Random Fella]

It's awful. There are twice the people to nag you and fuck you over at every opportunity. Just this christmas, I wanted an iPad from my Dad and a Blackberry from my Mum, and all I got was an iPod and a car. Fuck parents.

I know what you mean man all I got was a cruise around Fiji, I wanted a new computer :/
haha

 

[LetalisK]

Right about now they sort of have shoehorned into my life, making it next to impossible to leave the house right now. Thinking of joining the military.

Joining the military with the purpose of gaining freedom and autonomy? You might want to rethink that plan.

 

[Insanity72]

Warning wall of text
Short version: What's it like having 2 parents? I don't
Also feel free to ask any questions you want to someone who didn't have a dad.

So growing up my dad was only in the picture the first 3 years of my life.
And even then he never really did any parent duties, he just sort of terrorized the family (and still does sometimes when he's not in jail)
So I was raised by just my mom.

We went through ups and downs, we lived in the hood, we lived in a suburban house for a couple years thanks to Section 8 housing (government program) and a lot of places in between.
For a few years my mom had a boyfriend but he was like my dad only I had even less of a connection with him and he never contributed, just took our money.

But anyway, I only had my mom.
I had to learn a lot of things myself because, well some things moms dont teach.
I really love my mom and feel she's a great mother I just sometimes wonder what it's like having 2 parents and I feel it'd be to weird to ask anyone I know.

Can't tell you really, my mum died when i was 6 or 7 and can't really remember much before then.

 

[Hamish Durie]

It's awful. There are twice the people to nag you and fuck you over at every opportunity. Just this christmas, I wanted an iPad from my Dad and a Blackberry from my Mum, and all I got was an iPod and a car. Fuck parents.

stfu you spoilt asshole

Sarcasm, you know it?

yeah doesnt stop the fact that your being a bit of a douch >.>
OPs going on about how he only has one parent and your going on about how great your life is with 2 parents


Oh and my experiance with one parent so I can say I contributed something to this post instead of just pointing out that sarcasm doesnt help all that often as you think it does

Dad died of lung cancer (smoker) when I was 7 and me and mum
We have the occasional argument (im winning more and more >:3) and we take every chance to take the piss out of each other and shes always been there for me and Ive always been there me

You seem to have me confused with the person who wrote the comment, all i did was point out that it was sarcasm, and that it wasnt serious.

So why are you calling me a douche for what Tharwen wrote?

sorry was 2 in the morning when I wrote this and I must've overlooked it

 

[SongsOfDragons]

my father was the always-at-work-yay-Daddy's-home, driving, computer-y, fun-loving parent.

Yeah little off topic here but since your parents sound like mine I have to ask...
Did your dad always have to play with your christmas presents before you did? Cause I hated that.

No, he wasn't that bad. He's not really into the gaming side of technology much; the last games console he actually owned was an Atari 2600. ^^ If the big gift was a laptop (I'm on my third currently since 2003) he'd make sure it was all set up and ready before it was wrapped.

 

[EeveeElectro]

Can't really say, it's different for all people :/
I haven't seen my dad in about 10/11 years now but before that all I can remember is him and my mum arguing constantly and trying to make either one look bad.
My mum has a fiancée now but I don't think of him as my dad. I get on with him great I just don't want to think of him as my dad.

I'm quite jealous of people with stable families xD But oh well!~~

 

[monkey_man]

what I noticed from divorced parents (living with my mum) is; I lack certain strengths and truths about life. My mom is great, but some things just require a dad. It's really odd imagining my life in a different view, I guess I'd be stronger and fitter because my dad would have kicked me out if I gamed all day :3

 

[Alorxico]

Even in families that have two parents, sometimes only one does the actual "parenting". My family, for example.

My father was the stereotypical "bread-winner" and my mom was the one who did the actual raising of the kids. Mom was the go-to person if you had a fight that needed solving, a boo-boo to be kissed, a bad day at school or something to brag about. Dad was just kinda there. He was the one who had expectations for you, the one you felt you HAD to please because he was the one working during the day to put food on the table and clothes on your back. When things got tough, Mom had join the work force and she wasn't always there to hear about our day or help us solve a problem. We learned to be self-reliant at that point.

When my brother and I got older, Dad became a friend. He would joke around with us, play video games and watch movies with us, but he was still distant. He was still the bread-winner and if he had a bad day or we were stereotypical self-absorbed teenagers, he would threaten to take away everything he had given us and kick us out of the house. Those times were rare but scary, because he was our friend as well as our father and Mom would usually take his side because she was working as well.

 

[Sangreal Gothcraft]

It's awful. There are twice the people to nag you and fuck you over at every opportunity. Just this christmas, I wanted an iPad from my Dad and a Blackberry from my Mum, and all I got was an iPod and a car. Fuck parents.

You could get a job and start taking responsibility and buy your on stuff and be a little bit more independent then getting angry at mommy and daddy because they did not get you what you wanted. Be grateful you have both, i have only a mother.

 

[Smeggs]

My dad is literally more of a douchebag to me on a daily basis than my entire stint in middle or High school. He also constantly blames his family for shit that is nobody's fault.

So considering I more had a high school bully as a father than a father figure I really cannot tell you.

 

[Callate]

Well, it depends on the parents, really. I feel my parents were pretty good. They worked hard to make sure one or the other of them was always there when we needed them. They were good at different things, and liked different things, and encouraged appreciation of different things. My mother taught me about Shakespeare, my father taught me about Socrates. There were some things I'd only want to talk to my mother about, and some things I'd only want to talk to my father about.

Now to be clear, it isn't all sunlight and rainbows; two people are likely to have different views on some things, and it can create certain stresses and conflicts in a kid as well. My parents were Catholic, and my mother taught (among other things) feminist literature- not exactly the best climate for a heterosexual male to learn about sexuality, shall we say. But, by and large, I never felt other than loved, and never felt that there wouldn't be someone there to help me if I needed help. And that was awesome.

I quite admire single parents who do a good job, though. It's a hard enough job for two people.

 

[Aurora Firestorm]

It's nice to have two personalities. For one, oftentimes they can balance each other out. My dad in particular hates fantasy movies; he's the "no witchcraft" conservative type. My mom is really chill about it and helped him mellow out there. On the other hand, my dad is often less twitchy about certain other topics. Together, they make a good team.

Also, you don't get one harangued person driving the kids everywhere, dealing with all the problems, being sick at inconvenient times, etc. You have a team that can switch out when the going gets tough. They complement each other, and they can do double the work and thus de-stress each other and all of the kids and so on. If both parents have jobs, they will also make more money and thus have more room for A) bad stuff to happen without huge impact, and B) more luxuries.