What's the worst escort mission you've played through?

LaughingAtlas

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I'd agree with the OP, that prick goes out of his way to decieve the person helping him through the field of fucking rock golems so he can administer the potion thing rather than just giving it to you. His efforts to fake you out result in him getting crushed by those stony brutes, so I'm not sure what his aim was.

Still, in the name of not just saying 'I concur' and moving on, does anyone remember the whores involved in the Snatch activity of Saint's Row 1? It wasn't so much an escort mission as the same one over and over and over with essentially the same brain-dead women who make it quite clear why they couldn't get any other job by standing around not escaping the speeding cars and bullets coming their way. Countless times, I found myself sitting patiently in the car two feet away waiting for them to realize that my recruiting them is their cue to join, and they'd take so damn long to get to me that the car I was in would end up being destroyed by the aforementioned cars/bullets half the time, I'd have to get another, mission timer running down. Things have improved in SR2 and 3.
 

Vivi22

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Casual Shinji said:
Any escort mission from last generation except for Resident Evil 4 and Ico.

Seriously, Ashley is the best escortable (that's a word, right?) NPC in the history of gaming.
I would actually say RE4 for one specific part. My memory of it is a bit vague, but I recall Ashley up on some catwalk or something similar while the dudes in robes would try and grab her while she's supposed to be pulling leavers or something so you can advance. You have to cover her from below anyway, and because the game had never, at any point, even hinted that the scoped rifle was necessary to progress through the game, I didn't have one. After several failed attempts to pick them off from a decently long range with my handgun and shotgun I said screw it, reloaded an earlier save and bought the rifle.

The reason I'm naming this part is because until I got to that point I had no way of knowing I needed the rifle (in fact, I found it less useful than any other weapon 9 times out of 10), and if it weren't for the laser sight being a worthless piece of shit in that game (since it only appears on enemies making long range shooting difficult until you happen to wave it over one) I could have done it without buying the damn thing at all.
 

KarmaTheAlligator

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Elfgore said:
OT: The escort of that damn drone on Mass Effect 3's multiplayer. I could camp in a nice corner on gold but noooooo, I gotta leave my perfect spot and lead a brain dead robot to a certain point.
That objective came as a nasty surprise to me and my friends since we were getting back in ME3's MP after a 6 months break. Worst still it was on the infected radar base, can't remember the name, where you get a huge radioactive storm that won't let you see more than 5 feet in front of you (another nasty surprise for my sniper).

OT: Any and all escort quests in Bethesda games, bar Dishonored, due to suicidal AI.
 

IanDavis

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Aug 18, 2012
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The Witcher had some pretty nasty missions, even if they were optional. Your companions took damage really easily and couldn't be healed, so the best way to finish the quests were to save scum your way though it. Eventually, I just let the suckers die when I could.
 

The_Echo

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Johnny Novgorod said:
fuckthisguy.jpg
Honestly, I think the Alchemist is the best escort mission I've ever had to play through. It was awful when I was a kid, but it's fairly easy now.

I absolutely hated Ico, though. I feel like it's just as bad as any other escort mission, made worse by the odd controls and unrelenting waves of enemies. (It should be noted I didn't get very far before ragequitting to eternity.)
 

Nomanslander

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You want the worse type of escort missions? Play the ones from an MMO.

WoW comes to mind. The NPCs are basically programmed hardwired to follow a certain path, at a snail's pace. Of course, if they see enemies they'll charge in and whack 'em with bare fist (and the enemy could be some giant elite mob boss whatever). They'll aggro everything. And if you guys survive, the NPC will then run back to the point he deviated from his path to attack enemies, and continue on (at a snail's pace).

Of course this isn't the worst of it. Playing an MMO, that also means you have other players that might decide to dick around with you. And if you're playing on a PvP server, an enemy player might try to kill you or your escort. Sometimes they'll follow you around until the last second and gank either one of you a few short steps away from completing the quest. Forcing you to start over, and...

WITH NO GUARANTEE THAT PLAYER WON'T STICK AROUND TO DO IT AGAIN!!!

I'll say it...

/thread

:p
 

Legion

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Oct 2, 2008
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I don't even know why some people dislike escort missions on principle.

The only issue I have with escorting is when:

The AI sucks and does not respond properly.
The controls are unresponsive or not explained.
They are really slow.

Otherwise I don't see what the issue is.

Iwata said:
- The Harvest missions on Bioshock. It astounds me that they made a DLC based solely around it!
They are not escort missions as no escorting takes place. It's more like a horde mode when it comes to the harvesting. You are not leading anybody anywhere. You just play the game as normal and when you come across a special body you have to defend it for a time limit. The actual "escorting" part doesn't affect the normal game-play at all.

Bioshock 1 had an escort mission, and I can see why people would dislike that.
 

Casual Shinji

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Vivi22 said:
Casual Shinji said:
Any escort mission from last generation except for Resident Evil 4 and Ico.

Seriously, Ashley is the best escortable (that's a word, right?) NPC in the history of gaming.
I would actually say RE4 for one specific part. My memory of it is a bit vague, but I recall Ashley up on some catwalk or something similar while the dudes in robes would try and grab her while she's supposed to be pulling leavers or something so you can advance. You have to cover her from below anyway, and because the game had never, at any point, even hinted that the scoped rifle was necessary to progress through the game, I didn't have one. After several failed attempts to pick them off from a decently long range with my handgun and shotgun I said screw it, reloaded an earlier save and bought the rifle.

The reason I'm naming this part is because until I got to that point I had no way of knowing I needed the rifle (in fact, I found it less useful than any other weapon 9 times out of 10), and if it weren't for the laser sight being a worthless piece of shit in that game (since it only appears on enemies making long range shooting difficult until you happen to wave it over one) I could have done it without buying the damn thing at all.
Oh, I bought the rifle right quick. The only weapons in the game that are completely useless are the TMP and the Minethrower, on the count that you never get any ammo for them.

You do actually get a few rifle hints though. Right before you take that ski lift to the area where you fight Mendez, you find a box of 10 rifle rounds. Indicating that the next enemy encounter - the groups of ganados on the lift platforms - is best suited for the rifle, which it was.
 

Ryan Durel

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In WoW, before Cataclysm, there was an escort quest in the Swamp of Sorrows where you had to free a prisoner and escort him through an enemy camp.

The NPC you freed moved pretty fast, pulling decent groups at once (mind you, this was before the streamline changes, and I was playing a Warrior so I had no heals). Sometimes once the mob he was currently fighting was dead, he'd run off again and pull even more enemies.

That's the only quest in WoW that I refused to complete.
 

Mikeyfell

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Aug 24, 2010
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Amy.
/thread

Case in point. End of discussion.

Amy makes all the ones mentioned so far look like first class travle
 

Bad Jim

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Ah the escort mission. Would you believe there is an entire game based around this concept?

Behold! Sleepwalker.
..and despair.

 

Milanezi

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Goldeneye 007, protecting that redhead **** while she tried to hack the computer. me and every friend who owned that game HATED that woman and the need to protect her...
 

kasperbbs

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All of them. Oddly i can't recall any of them, only from that dreadful abomination that was supposed to be c&c tiberium wars 4 where you had to escort kane and he got stuck on something somehow, thats when i decided to uninstall it and never look back.
 

TheSteeleStrap

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This may not be the worst, but most recently I did the escort level of VVVVVV. It's a very good game, but fuck that level...
 

Johnny Novgorod

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Legion said:
I don't even know why some people dislike escort missions on principle.

The only issue I have with escorting is when:

The AI sucks and does not respond properly.
The controls are unresponsive or not explained.
They are really slow.

Otherwise I don't see what the issue is.
The problem is that usually there is no "otherwise": 90% of the time AI really does suck, being slow, unintuitive and unresponsive.

EcoEclipse said:
Johnny Novgorod said:
fuckthisguy.jpg
Honestly, I think the Alchemist is the best escort mission I've ever had to play through. It was awful when I was a kid, but it's fairly easy now.

I absolutely hated Ico, though. I feel like it's just as bad as any other escort mission, made worse by the odd controls and unrelenting waves of enemies. (It should be noted I didn't get very far before ragequitting to eternity.)
That's a shame, it's the one game where escorting really blends in nicely as a core mechanic. I don't remember anything odd about the controls. I agree the enemies had an annoying tendency to spawn beyond their welcome, though.
 

Pink Gregory

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Matt9102 said:
All of the survivors in both Dead Rising games were insanely annoying. Most of the survivors also had no story and were in general boring to have to deal with. However, Snowflake gets the honor of both being the most retarded and being a tiger, so I think that makes up for it.
No story?

Roland ate the entire contents of a sandwich shop.

There's a story in that...somewhere.
 

The_Echo

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Johnny Novgorod said:
EcoEclipse said:
Johnny Novgorod said:
fuckthisguy.jpg
Honestly, I think the Alchemist is the best escort mission I've ever had to play through. It was awful when I was a kid, but it's fairly easy now.

I absolutely hated Ico, though. I feel like it's just as bad as any other escort mission, made worse by the odd controls and unrelenting waves of enemies. (It should be noted I didn't get very far before ragequitting to eternity.)
That's a shame, it's the one game where escorting really blends in nicely as a core mechanic. I don't remember anything odd about the controls. I agree the enemies had an annoying tendency to spawn beyond their welcome, though.
Not the controls, really, but the way it controlled. It's not exactly Super Meat Boy precision and tightness we're working with, here. Shadow of the Colossus worked similarly, but I think that game managed to pull it off far better.

I really don't think the escorting blended well at all. Running with Yorda is jerky and weird, and her utter lack of capability to do much of anything by herself really stands out as a negative for me. I feel like it's necessary to bring her with me every step of the way, or else she'll get caught and I won't be fast enough to get to her in time. So that jerky movement is a constant thing. There was a bit in a courtyard that took me several tries to clear because of how big the room was and where the enemy spawns were.

It kind of feels like they took a pure-exploration game and stuck unwieldy combat and a stupid-AI partner in for no clear reason.
 

aguspal

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I dont think I will ever understand why people hate so much escort missions. If the NPC to scort dies in one hit or two, then I can see the trouble, but in general they are good meatshields and agroo the enemies off you. I dont see it as such a big deal.

Matt9102 said:
All of the survivors in both Dead Rising games were insanely annoying. Most of the survivors also had no story and were in general boring to have to deal with. However, Snowflake gets the honor of both being the most retarded and being a tiger, so I think that makes up for it.
Matt9102 said:
All of the survivors in both Dead Rising games were insanely annoying. Most of the survivors also had no story and were in general boring to have to deal with. However, Snowflake gets the honor of both being the most retarded and being a tiger, so I think that makes up for it.

Wow really? The Dead rising series, if anything the survivors theres are the BEST escort missions I have had- At least in Dead Rising 2. Armed well and provived theres at least 6 of them togheter, they can take on a psychopath (BOSSSES of the game, no less!) by themselves with 0 player help in 10 seconds or so, wayyy faster than you could ever do.



So yeah. Thats 6-8 escort mission NPCs taking on a BOSS in 10 seconds, with no player help at all. Thats actually pretty badass if you ask me. Of course its pretty situational, but it still counts.
 

Fractral

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Feb 28, 2012
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TheSteeleStrap said:
This may not be the worst, but most recently I did the escort level of VVVVVV. It's a very good game, but fuck that level...
I loved that level, even if it was the only one in the game that I needed to find a guide for. Probably the hardest part of the game except for the shiny trinket in the space station, or the gravitron.