Where would you hide a dead body?

[Mr. Happy Face]

Im pretty sure that if we gone though all the trouble to kill somone and then trying to get rid of it, we hcan handle some hard chopping work.
as for microscopic bits, if im not a suspect as there is no body, how would they know where to look?...

Well, I'll grant you that if you're already willing to kill someone, they you shouldn't mind some hard work. But chopping up a body is rather like chopping wood with regards to strength requirements. Not everyone is capable of it. You could use a hacksaw, I suppose, but that's still a lot of work, and takes even more time.

And as for that second bit, you know which murderers get caught? The ones who are sloppy and take chances. Better to prepare fully and minimize risk.

Sufuric accid can be found in drain cleaners, and they are sold pretty much everywhere now. given time, it can dissolve the body. I live at the edge of town. like litterary driving to town my house is the 3rd one. i got a motor air pump that can throw the smell of a top of a 9 storey building. problem is - it seems there are flaws in design and some neighbors can get the smells "Throw in" into their homes if they dont have backward shutters. most do but the risk is too great.
time is hardly a problem because you would likely need time to organize getting rid of the dissolved material. surely you dont suggest pouring it down your own drain.

True on the sulfuric acid in drain cleaners, but remember what else I said. The large quantities you'd need to completely dissolve a body can leave a paper trail for authorities to find. Unless you are a plumber or something, it looks kinda suspicious buying that much drain cleaner. As for time, British serial murder John George Haigh dissolved six of his victims, using 45 gallon drums and sulfuric acid. The process took about two days, and he reported that the stench was awful. (This is where my info comes from, by the way.) Sure, you'd need time to dispose of the resultant material, but two days is a long time, during which something could easily go wrong.

Interesting additional fact; Mexican drug cartels are known for dissolving their victims in boiling lye. The process takes anywhere from three to five hours, depending on the temperature of the boil, and the residual material is a tan liquid with the consistency of mineral oil.

And no, I don't recommend pouring either resultant slurry down the drain.

 

[Strazdas]

Im pretty sure that if we gone though all the trouble to kill somone and then trying to get rid of it, we hcan handle some hard chopping work.
as for microscopic bits, if im not a suspect as there is no body, how would they know where to look?...

Well, I'll grant you that if you're already willing to kill someone, they you shouldn't mind some hard work. But chopping up a body is rather like chopping wood with regards to strength requirements. Not everyone is capable of it. You could use a hacksaw, I suppose, but that's still a lot of work, and takes even more time.

And as for that second bit, you know which murderers get caught? The ones who are sloppy and take chances. Better to prepare fully and minimize risk.

Sufuric accid can be found in drain cleaners, and they are sold pretty much everywhere now. given time, it can dissolve the body. I live at the edge of town. like litterary driving to town my house is the 3rd one. i got a motor air pump that can throw the smell of a top of a 9 storey building. problem is - it seems there are flaws in design and some neighbors can get the smells "Throw in" into their homes if they dont have backward shutters. most do but the risk is too great.
time is hardly a problem because you would likely need time to organize getting rid of the dissolved material. surely you dont suggest pouring it down your own drain.

True on the sulfuric acid in drain cleaners, but remember what else I said. The large quantities you'd need to completely dissolve a body can leave a paper trail for authorities to find. Unless you are a plumber or something, it looks kinda suspicious buying that much drain cleaner. As for time, British serial murder John George Haigh dissolved six of his victims, using 45 gallon drums and sulfuric acid. The process took about two days, and he reported that the stench was awful. (This is where my info comes from, by the way.) Sure, you'd need time to dispose of the resultant material, but two days is a long time, during which something could easily go wrong.

Interesting additional fact; Mexican drug cartels are known for dissolving their victims in boiling lye. The process takes anywhere from three to five hours, depending on the temperature of the boil, and the residual material is a tan liquid with the consistency of mineral oil.

And no, I don't recommend pouring either resultant slurry down the drain.

indeed preparedness is the Key here. So it takes whole 2 days for the process to dissolve? Slower than i had hoped. i was expecting something closer to 8-12 hours.
I have no ideas about the ratios needed for dissolving, but you could go though multiple shops to minimize the "buy at once" quantity. and of course pay cash. people do buy drain cleaners sometimes so it probably wouldnt light a red light. also once agian preparedness wins if you were slowly buying it up in, say, over a month.

But still there is a problem of Odor.

 

[Mr. Happy Face]

indeed preparedness is the Key here. So it takes whole 2 days for the process to dissolve? Slower than i had hoped. i was expecting something closer to 8-12 hours.
I have no ideas about the ratios needed for dissolving, but you could go though multiple shops to minimize the "buy at once" quantity. and of course pay cash. people do buy drain cleaners sometimes so it probably wouldnt light a red light. also once agian preparedness wins if you were slowly buying it up in, say, over a month.

But still there is a problem of Odor.

Yeah, that would probably work. The only thing I see going wrong is cameras. Big home improvement retailers, and even some of the mom-and-pop outlets, have cameras installed to prevent shoplifting. So it's possible that a really thorough investigation could uncover your purchases, even if you spread them out over time and location. Not likely, I admit. But possible. And the sulfuric acid in drain cleaner is very diluted. You'd need to buy an awful lot of it to do the job. Plus, it's very hard to get stronger acids, as it's a controlled substance due to it's use in bomb making.

The lye method I mentioned might be easier, as it requires a lot less time, and it's not hard to pick up large quantities of lye. It's used to make soap, so you could go to a soap-making site and purchase enough of it. Plus, it's a more believable purchase if it's discovered.

COP: Why did you purchase 50 gallons of drain cleaner?
YOU: ... I have really clogged drains?

...just doesn't sound good. More believable is...

COP: Why did you purchase five pounds of lye?
YOU: I'm learning how to make my own soap, and I wanted to try out lots of different fragrances.

Now that sounds a bit more believable. Sure, you have the problem of acquiring a big enough "pot" for your boil. And the lye leaves behind medical implants and a fair bit of bone material. But they are more manageable problems.

 

[Beautiful Tragedy]

I always liked my ex-wife's idea; bludgeon to death, toss in a deep freeze, cut into little pieces and put in a garbage bag, drive cross country, while tossing "bits" out every so often.... yeah it's a lot of work, but sounds fun.

 

[Johnny Impact]

I have no idea whether this would work, but I'd try running the body through a heavy duty meat grinder, ideally something that could pulverize teeth and bones. There wouldn't be any body to hide. The resulting mess could simply be poured in a river. Just have to make sure the grinder and surrounding area are scrupulously clean and sprayed with enough chemicals to ruin DNA evidence.

Without the use of such a device, I would drive about 200 miles out into the sticks, drag the body a mile or so into the woods, and bury it in as deep a hole as I could dig. I'd try to get some lime to cover it with.

Captcha: space is big. That's it! I'll hide the body in space!

 

[Callate]

If logistics aren't an issue, fiction has led me to believe that the Everglades are a great place for a big hunk o' carrion to get hauled away and eaten by the local fauna.

There are also some mud flats in Alaska where a body would get sucked down and likely never seen again.

More realistically and locally, it would probably be a better bet to find a way to destroy the body than try to hide it whole. There's just no way to drag a big corpse-shaped bundle around that isn't going to get noticed in a world of security- and cell-phone cameras. Get a machete and a meat grinder, and feed it to the local dogs. Or flush it down the garbage disposal, slowly, in pieces.

(Yuck.)

I'm really glad I'm not a murderer. I occasionally have nightmares where I've killed someone in the distant past and forgotten about it, and it comes back to haunt me. Makes me nostalgic for getting the traditional "actor's nightmare".

 

[Strazdas]

indeed preparedness is the Key here. So it takes whole 2 days for the process to dissolve? Slower than i had hoped. i was expecting something closer to 8-12 hours.
I have no ideas about the ratios needed for dissolving, but you could go though multiple shops to minimize the "buy at once" quantity. and of course pay cash. people do buy drain cleaners sometimes so it probably wouldnt light a red light. also once agian preparedness wins if you were slowly buying it up in, say, over a month.

But still there is a problem of Odor.

Yeah, that would probably work. The only thing I see going wrong is cameras. Big home improvement retailers, and even some of the mom-and-pop outlets, have cameras installed to prevent shoplifting. So it's possible that a really thorough investigation could uncover your purchases, even if you spread them out over time and location. Not likely, I admit. But possible. And the sulfuric acid in drain cleaner is very diluted. You'd need to buy an awful lot of it to do the job. Plus, it's very hard to get stronger acids, as it's a controlled substance due to it's use in bomb making.

The lye method I mentioned might be easier, as it requires a lot less time, and it's not hard to pick up large quantities of lye. It's used to make soap, so you could go to a soap-making site and purchase enough of it. Plus, it's a more believable purchase if it's discovered.

COP: Why did you purchase 50 gallons of drain cleaner?
YOU: ... I have really clogged drains?

...just doesn't sound good. More believable is...

COP: Why did you purchase five pounds of lye?
YOU: I'm learning how to make my own soap, and I wanted to try out lots of different fragrances.

Now that sounds a bit more believable. Sure, you have the problem of acquiring a big enough "pot" for your boil. And the lye leaves behind medical implants and a fair bit of bone material. But they are more manageable problems.

Yes a very thoural investigation could recover camera footage if it is within 30 days (legaly needed to keep footage, no storage to keep more than that). However that assumes the police know what happened. If a person would "Dissapear", would they even think of "check all supermarkets for people buying drain cleaners". If they dont know how i got rid of body or that the body even exists and its not just runaway or something, so theres that.
Lye seems to be also part of drain cleaners as well as other things. and indeed it may be a better solution. The bone fragments would be another story to get rid of them though.
Yes, a lot of material that would be useful in such situation is tightly controlled, thus diminishing its effectiveness. Heck, even chloroform cannot be sold legally nowadays. and home made chloroform while not hard to make is unstable and dissolves too quickly. basically yuou got to use it as soon as you make it or it will go bad.

I always liked my ex-wife's idea; bludgeon to death, toss in a deep freeze, cut into little pieces and put in a garbage bag, drive cross country, while tossing "bits" out every so often.... yeah it's a lot of work, but sounds fun.

I understand some people think of murder as fun but getting rid of the body is fun?

 

[Pinkamena]

Very simple, really.

There's a few metal barrels, the kind you use for oil, in my back yard. I shove the body into one and put something heavy in there as well, some rocks probably. Then I seal it, and drill about 10 cookie-sized holes. I also have a boat, and live very close to the sea. See where this is going?

I take the body-filled barrel to the boat at night, go a few kilometers out, and lump the barrel overboard. I bring a fishing rod so I have a reason to go out during the night. If anyone ask what I'm doing with a barrel, I say it's fuel. So anyways, the barrel is in the water, and it fills with water and sink in a matter of seconds. The holes I have drilled into it will be big enough for shrimps, crabs, and other flesh-eating animals to get in, but small enough to keep body parts inside. Then I just let nature do its thing!

It's a lot cleaner than trying to dissolve the body yourself, or chop it into pieces as I've seen people suggest. There's literally nothing to clean up, and you don't need to be super secretive.

 

[Beautiful Tragedy]

I understand some people think of murder as fun but getting rid of the body is fun?

Sure, consider it a challenge. The most creative way to dispose of a body

she also asked me once (around that same time) and while hopped up on pain killers from a surgery she had - if it was possible to bludgeon someone to death with a nintendo DS (she happened to have one in her hands at the time BTW.

 

[Beautiful Tragedy]

It's a lot cleaner than trying to dissolve the body yourself, or chop it into pieces as I've seen people suggest. There's literally nothing to clean up, and you don't need to be super secretive.

that's why you FREEZE the body first... no mess

 

[Mr. Happy Face]

Very simple, really.

There's a few metal barrels, the kind you use for oil, in my back yard. I shove the body into one and put something heavy in there as well, some rocks probably. Then I seal it, and drill about 10 cookie-sized holes. I also have a boat, and live very close to the sea. See where this is going?

I take the body-filled barrel to the boat at night, go a few kilometers out, and lump the barrel overboard. I bring a fishing rod so I have a reason to go out during the night. If anyone ask what I'm doing with a barrel, I say it's fuel. So anyways, the barrel is in the water, and it fills with water and sink in a matter of seconds. The holes I have drilled into it will be big enough for shrimps, crabs, and other flesh-eating animals to get in, but small enough to keep body parts inside. Then I just let nature do its thing!

It's a lot cleaner than trying to dissolve the body yourself, or chop it into pieces as I've seen people suggest. There's literally nothing to clean up, and you don't need to be super secretive.

1. A body is heavy. On average, males weight between 76 and 83 kilos, and females weight between 54 and 64 kilos. Add in the weight of the barrel and whatever you use as a sinking weight, and you're talking some real weight there. You either need a hand truck for movement (acceptable) or you need someone to help (something to avoid). You chop up a body not just for ease of disposal, but for ease of movement.

2. If those holes in your barrel are spotted, your fuel story goes right out the window. Kinda hard to say that your barrel holds fuel when it has big damned holes in it.

Still, there's a good plan here. The weight issue can easily be overcome with hoists and a hand truck, and a portable drill lets you wait until you're out on the water to add your holes. Just make sure to dump that barrel in an out the way place. Won't do to have some scuba diver find it, after all.

 

[Strazdas]

If anyone ask what I'm doing with a barrel, I say it's fuel.

I dont understand. your explanation would be you would be dropping fuel into water? oil dump? wouldnt that get every enviromental inspector in the coutnry after you?

 

[Lieju]

I usually cut them to pieces and feed them to pigs.

I think I could also ditch it to a slaughterhouse, mix it with some pigs and have humans eat it, but they have safety and health-procedures for that, so I doubt I could do that alone.

I handle animal carcasses regularly, so I could do it easily. I would of course never kill a human, but I wouldn't have a problem cutting up a body once it's dead.
But I have trouble imagining having to hide a body.

A human body, that is.

I know of people who buried corpses of cows illegally in certain places, though.

Feed a body to animals? Sounds good, until you realize that there is quite a lot of DNA that can remain in animal excrement.

Only if they know to look there. (Which, I guess, is true for every way of disposing the body)

But DNA-testing takes time and is expensive. The police isn't going to go trough the droppings of hundreds of pigs on the off-chance they'll find something.

 

[Do4600]

This is one of those hypothetical questions I can't resist, I watched too many murder mysteries when I was young. I would remove the teeth, seal it in plastic and mummify it with duck tape then shove it in a wooden canoe and cover it with a canoe cover then I would drive 18 hours north until I'm 80 miles south of the border of Canada. Then I would cut down a few trees and build a huge box bonfire at least two meters high and put the canoe on top of it and set it all a kindle, then I would drive away. With that much fuel it shouldn't have any trouble reaching a temperature sufficient to totally cremate the remains. In all probability whatever evidence left at the scene would be lost from the fire spreading and in any event it would be nearly impossible to track a crime back 1000 miles over pavement.

 

[Foolery]

Because I'm boring, simply seal in a barrel with cement, go boating and dump in a lake. No one's going to find it. Not in the lake I'm thinking of anyway. It's too big, deep, and murky to find anything.