Where would you hide a dead body?

[Strazdas]

indeed preparedness is the Key here. So it takes whole 2 days for the process to dissolve? Slower than i had hoped. i was expecting something closer to 8-12 hours.
I have no ideas about the ratios needed for dissolving, but you could go though multiple shops to minimize the "buy at once" quantity. and of course pay cash. people do buy drain cleaners sometimes so it probably wouldnt light a red light. also once agian preparedness wins if you were slowly buying it up in, say, over a month.

But still there is a problem of Odor.

Yeah, that would probably work. The only thing I see going wrong is cameras. Big home improvement retailers, and even some of the mom-and-pop outlets, have cameras installed to prevent shoplifting. So it's possible that a really thorough investigation could uncover your purchases, even if you spread them out over time and location. Not likely, I admit. But possible. And the sulfuric acid in drain cleaner is very diluted. You'd need to buy an awful lot of it to do the job. Plus, it's very hard to get stronger acids, as it's a controlled substance due to it's use in bomb making.

The lye method I mentioned might be easier, as it requires a lot less time, and it's not hard to pick up large quantities of lye. It's used to make soap, so you could go to a soap-making site and purchase enough of it. Plus, it's a more believable purchase if it's discovered.

COP: Why did you purchase 50 gallons of drain cleaner?
YOU: ... I have really clogged drains?

...just doesn't sound good. More believable is...

COP: Why did you purchase five pounds of lye?
YOU: I'm learning how to make my own soap, and I wanted to try out lots of different fragrances.

Now that sounds a bit more believable. Sure, you have the problem of acquiring a big enough "pot" for your boil. And the lye leaves behind medical implants and a fair bit of bone material. But they are more manageable problems.

Yes a very thoural investigation could recover camera footage if it is within 30 days (legaly needed to keep footage, no storage to keep more than that). However that assumes the police know what happened. If a person would "Dissapear", would they even think of "check all supermarkets for people buying drain cleaners". If they dont know how i got rid of body or that the body even exists and its not just runaway or something, so theres that.
Lye seems to be also part of drain cleaners as well as other things. and indeed it may be a better solution. The bone fragments would be another story to get rid of them though.
Yes, a lot of material that would be useful in such situation is tightly controlled, thus diminishing its effectiveness. Heck, even chloroform cannot be sold legally nowadays. and home made chloroform while not hard to make is unstable and dissolves too quickly. basically yuou got to use it as soon as you make it or it will go bad.

I always liked my ex-wife's idea; bludgeon to death, toss in a deep freeze, cut into little pieces and put in a garbage bag, drive cross country, while tossing "bits" out every so often.... yeah it's a lot of work, but sounds fun.

I understand some people think of murder as fun but getting rid of the body is fun?

 

[Pinkamena]

Very simple, really.

There's a few metal barrels, the kind you use for oil, in my back yard. I shove the body into one and put something heavy in there as well, some rocks probably. Then I seal it, and drill about 10 cookie-sized holes. I also have a boat, and live very close to the sea. See where this is going?

I take the body-filled barrel to the boat at night, go a few kilometers out, and lump the barrel overboard. I bring a fishing rod so I have a reason to go out during the night. If anyone ask what I'm doing with a barrel, I say it's fuel. So anyways, the barrel is in the water, and it fills with water and sink in a matter of seconds. The holes I have drilled into it will be big enough for shrimps, crabs, and other flesh-eating animals to get in, but small enough to keep body parts inside. Then I just let nature do its thing!

It's a lot cleaner than trying to dissolve the body yourself, or chop it into pieces as I've seen people suggest. There's literally nothing to clean up, and you don't need to be super secretive.

 

[Beautiful Tragedy]

I understand some people think of murder as fun but getting rid of the body is fun?

Sure, consider it a challenge. The most creative way to dispose of a body

she also asked me once (around that same time) and while hopped up on pain killers from a surgery she had - if it was possible to bludgeon someone to death with a nintendo DS (she happened to have one in her hands at the time BTW.

 

[Beautiful Tragedy]

It's a lot cleaner than trying to dissolve the body yourself, or chop it into pieces as I've seen people suggest. There's literally nothing to clean up, and you don't need to be super secretive.

that's why you FREEZE the body first... no mess

 

[Mr. Happy Face]

Very simple, really.

There's a few metal barrels, the kind you use for oil, in my back yard. I shove the body into one and put something heavy in there as well, some rocks probably. Then I seal it, and drill about 10 cookie-sized holes. I also have a boat, and live very close to the sea. See where this is going?

I take the body-filled barrel to the boat at night, go a few kilometers out, and lump the barrel overboard. I bring a fishing rod so I have a reason to go out during the night. If anyone ask what I'm doing with a barrel, I say it's fuel. So anyways, the barrel is in the water, and it fills with water and sink in a matter of seconds. The holes I have drilled into it will be big enough for shrimps, crabs, and other flesh-eating animals to get in, but small enough to keep body parts inside. Then I just let nature do its thing!

It's a lot cleaner than trying to dissolve the body yourself, or chop it into pieces as I've seen people suggest. There's literally nothing to clean up, and you don't need to be super secretive.

1. A body is heavy. On average, males weight between 76 and 83 kilos, and females weight between 54 and 64 kilos. Add in the weight of the barrel and whatever you use as a sinking weight, and you're talking some real weight there. You either need a hand truck for movement (acceptable) or you need someone to help (something to avoid). You chop up a body not just for ease of disposal, but for ease of movement.

2. If those holes in your barrel are spotted, your fuel story goes right out the window. Kinda hard to say that your barrel holds fuel when it has big damned holes in it.

Still, there's a good plan here. The weight issue can easily be overcome with hoists and a hand truck, and a portable drill lets you wait until you're out on the water to add your holes. Just make sure to dump that barrel in an out the way place. Won't do to have some scuba diver find it, after all.

 

[Strazdas]

If anyone ask what I'm doing with a barrel, I say it's fuel.

I dont understand. your explanation would be you would be dropping fuel into water? oil dump? wouldnt that get every enviromental inspector in the coutnry after you?

 

[Lieju]

I usually cut them to pieces and feed them to pigs.

I think I could also ditch it to a slaughterhouse, mix it with some pigs and have humans eat it, but they have safety and health-procedures for that, so I doubt I could do that alone.

I handle animal carcasses regularly, so I could do it easily. I would of course never kill a human, but I wouldn't have a problem cutting up a body once it's dead.
But I have trouble imagining having to hide a body.

A human body, that is.

I know of people who buried corpses of cows illegally in certain places, though.

Feed a body to animals? Sounds good, until you realize that there is quite a lot of DNA that can remain in animal excrement.

Only if they know to look there. (Which, I guess, is true for every way of disposing the body)

But DNA-testing takes time and is expensive. The police isn't going to go trough the droppings of hundreds of pigs on the off-chance they'll find something.

 

[Do4600]

This is one of those hypothetical questions I can't resist, I watched too many murder mysteries when I was young. I would remove the teeth, seal it in plastic and mummify it with duck tape then shove it in a wooden canoe and cover it with a canoe cover then I would drive 18 hours north until I'm 80 miles south of the border of Canada. Then I would cut down a few trees and build a huge box bonfire at least two meters high and put the canoe on top of it and set it all a kindle, then I would drive away. With that much fuel it shouldn't have any trouble reaching a temperature sufficient to totally cremate the remains. In all probability whatever evidence left at the scene would be lost from the fire spreading and in any event it would be nearly impossible to track a crime back 1000 miles over pavement.

 

[Foolery]

Because I'm boring, simply seal in a barrel with cement, go boating and dump in a lake. No one's going to find it. Not in the lake I'm thinking of anyway. It's too big, deep, and murky to find anything.