Why is it almost taboo to enjoy being alone?

[IndomitableSam]

I live with my twin sister. Every couple weeks, we go out with friends. We work with people all day and like being alone... sort of. It's kind of a grey area as to if you're alone if you're with your twin or not.

Some people find it weird that we spend so much time together and aren't interested in dating/going out all the time. We get (most) of our social needs filled by each other, and then go out every now and again otherwise.

We simply don't care what other people think - we're happy as we are, so screw what other people think.

As teens, our parents were worried about us not having friends, but soon after that we fell into a group and were out almost nightly of our own volition.

Anyway, being a twin is kinda different, but we generally hate other people and don't like going out much, either.

 

[Scarim Coral]

I guess some people view human beings as a social beings and that they cannot survive being alone and cannot get far by themselves. While that is half true but there has been plenty of people achiving or done stuff just by themselves or a single person had survive while others fail.

 

[Old Father Eternity]

Humans, odd creatures, quite interesting subjects to observe, difficult to figure out however, invoking emotions from amusement to sadness.
Long term direct interaction over rated, though often required, luckily not entirely without benefits.
Regardless, interaction preferably kept to a minimum.


In all seriousness, socializing does not quite live up to its hype. True it has its benefits and one can stumble upon really good companions, even if just for a little while. However even that can get tiresome quickly, perhaps it is one of those aspects in which some people are just wired differently.

 

[Dtox333]

It's funny, I came onto this website thinking the same question due to some things people have said. Not directly at me, but I still disagree with them.

I'm very much comfortable being a loner. I don't get out much, and when I am out I'd rather stay in my own little area to myself. I don't even care much about being around friends, nor do I care about whether or not I have a girlfriend (frankly, I'm quite happy with not having one).

It's not like I'm socially awkward, I CAN be, but people I've met and befriended have said that they never would have guessed that about myself.

Those who think being sociable and outgoing is anything more than a personal preference are just full of themselves.

I'm more than comfortable being who I am, and if that's wrong, well then I don't want to be right.

 

[Smolderin]

Don't feel so alone on this matter. I to enjoy being alone and away from others. Other people just tend to look at me strange and condemn me for enjoying a single, solitary lifestyle. I enjoy the quiet...and the less interaction I have with humanity...the happier I am.

 

[370999]

Because human society is based on interraction with others. Who made the computer you are reasing this on, the bed you sleepp on, the food you eat? Other people. Human beings need to interact with each other to survive with any measure of comfort.

No I do think contemporary western society has been neglecting the concept of "aloneness" a bit too much, it is important for people to spend some time alone.

But in general there is a good reason for peopel to interract with each other.

 

[Old Father Eternity]

But in general there is a good reason for people to interact with each other.

True, as the human race as a whole needs to interact, some individuals here and there are of no consequence but for the whole society to fallow suit would be among several unwanted situations that would bring about stagnation and fading into the oblivion of time.

 

[JackandTom]

If people want to spend time with you, that's cool. My problem is that people worry about me, and feel bad for leaving me alone, asking me "Are you alright?" over and over. Yes, sometimes I wish to be alone.

How they think I feel when I'm alone
http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mczz1sOfyN1r53qfl.gif

What I actually feel like when I'm alone
http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mcmde0nF311rretvp.gif

That had to be explained in gif format.

Sometimes it's just specific people that I'd rather be alone from than stood talking to them. If I'm with my brother/s we see eye to eye so I'd like to talk to them rather than to myself

 

[Professor Lupin Madblood]

The single most aggravating thing about it is towards the end of the night, they started handing out the awards for "Most Popular student" and what not, and I go back in because I want to see if any of my friends won anything. So I'm chilling in the back again, and the same assholes from before keep trying to engage me again during the award ceremony. Even has the nerve to tell me not to be bummed out that I didn't win anything. Like really? Really?

Fun fact about the awards, I knew virtually NONE of the people of that won shit. It was like watching the Academy Awards.

Other fun fact? Post awards they start dancing again, I return to the lobby to play Tetris.... I get to eavesdrop on a conversation of these... I don't know if they were jocks, I'm just assuming because they seemed athletic, and one of them WAS incredibly bent out of shape that he didn't win something. I found it amusing.

When my high school had our prom for all the graduates, the awards segment was a gong show. I didn't actually attend the dance (I had tried to give the semi-formal earlier in the year a chance and was sorely disappointed), but from what I hear, it was kind of bullshit.

For instance, the graduates vote on who gets what award, but it's up to student council to count the votes and deal with the process. For almost every single award, a student council member got it. The best example was when, in the "Most likely to live in a nudist colony" category, a girl who regularly wore denim jackets, had multiple piercings, discussed her bodily functions at volume, and now participates in roller derby lost to this conservative, keener, probably Christian girl who had the personality of a floorboard.

Institutions suck.

 

[DudeistBelieve]

The single most aggravating thing about it is towards the end of the night, they started handing out the awards for "Most Popular student" and what not, and I go back in because I want to see if any of my friends won anything. So I'm chilling in the back again, and the same assholes from before keep trying to engage me again during the award ceremony. Even has the nerve to tell me not to be bummed out that I didn't win anything. Like really? Really?

Fun fact about the awards, I knew virtually NONE of the people of that won shit. It was like watching the Academy Awards.

Other fun fact? Post awards they start dancing again, I return to the lobby to play Tetris.... I get to eavesdrop on a conversation of these... I don't know if they were jocks, I'm just assuming because they seemed athletic, and one of them WAS incredibly bent out of shape that he didn't win something. I found it amusing.

When my high school had our prom for all the graduates, the awards segment was a gong show. I didn't actually attend the dance (I had tried to give the semi-formal earlier in the year a chance and was sorely disappointed), but from what I hear, it was kind of bullshit.

For instance, the graduates vote on who gets what award, but it's up to student council to count the votes and deal with the process. For almost every single award, a student council member got it. The best example was when, in the "Most likely to live in a nudist colony" category, a girl who regularly wore denim jackets, had multiple piercings, discussed her bodily functions at volume, and now participates in roller derby lost to this conservative, keener, probably Christian girl who had the personality of a floorboard.

Institutions suck.

Funny how the way the microcosm of High School works so easily mirrors the "real world".

 

[Professor Lupin Madblood]

The single most aggravating thing about it is towards the end of the night, they started handing out the awards for "Most Popular student" and what not, and I go back in because I want to see if any of my friends won anything. So I'm chilling in the back again, and the same assholes from before keep trying to engage me again during the award ceremony. Even has the nerve to tell me not to be bummed out that I didn't win anything. Like really? Really?

Fun fact about the awards, I knew virtually NONE of the people of that won shit. It was like watching the Academy Awards.

Other fun fact? Post awards they start dancing again, I return to the lobby to play Tetris.... I get to eavesdrop on a conversation of these... I don't know if they were jocks, I'm just assuming because they seemed athletic, and one of them WAS incredibly bent out of shape that he didn't win something. I found it amusing.

When my high school had our prom for all the graduates, the awards segment was a gong show. I didn't actually attend the dance (I had tried to give the semi-formal earlier in the year a chance and was sorely disappointed), but from what I hear, it was kind of bullshit.

For instance, the graduates vote on who gets what award, but it's up to student council to count the votes and deal with the process. For almost every single award, a student council member got it. The best example was when, in the "Most likely to live in a nudist colony" category, a girl who regularly wore denim jackets, had multiple piercings, discussed her bodily functions at volume, and now participates in roller derby lost to this conservative, keener, probably Christian girl who had the personality of a floorboard.

Institutions suck.

Funny how the way the microcosm of High School works so easily mirrors the "real world".

 

[Subscriptism]

The people that don't like being alone are the ones that socialise typically and thus decide the social taboo.

 

[lumenadducere]

There are still many who hold onto the idea that being alone somehow makes you inferior - it must mean that you're socially inept or awkward and that in turn must mean that there's something wrong with you.

Generally speaking, humans are social creatures and society teaches us to seek and approve of social behavior. It's slowly changing, but the idea still holds that those who don't fit into the norm must have some sort of flaw that makes them inferior. From my experience the people who actually bother pointing that out are pretty ignorant and not worth the time of day.

To be fair, you are coming to a gaming forum that is more likely to have people who sympathize with you and feel that it's no big deal, like me. You'd probably get a different response from a different group of people. That being said, we're right and they're wrong.

 

[Olas]

People will always fear what they don't understand.

Social people will never understand why some people like being alone. For someone with social anxiety being alone is the only way you can truly feel free. I don't feel lonely when I'm alone, I feel lonely when I'm in a large crowd.

 

[Moonlight Butterfly]

I hate being around people I'm not comfortable with. My sister, who is an extrovert really doesn't understand this and tries her hardest to make me act more like her. She's not vindictive about it but it can be very tiring.

I'm the sort of person who has close friends but very few of them rather than many average friends. I like being alone and I'm happiest curled up with a good book or a video game.

My best mate and I co op on loads of games but I'm no social butterfly on them.

I think it's case of extroverts not understanding rather than there being something morally wrong with wanting to be alone.

 

[The_Waspman]

I don't have any kind of social life at all. Why is that? Because all of my friends are either married, in serious relationships and/or have kids, which eat up all their spare time.

So if anyone accuses me of spending too much time alone, I will go right ahead and blame them for it.

On a more serious note, I don't see it as a problem really. Sure, I have this empty void inside me, but thats more to do with the fact I am frequently bored. And I don't much enjoy being around other people. Hell, I cant stand being around mself for more than a few hours at a time, so i don't really get how anyone else could either...

 

[someonehairy-ish]

What's your job then, out of curiosity?

 

[wrightguy0]

i'm an introvert, though i'm not above going out to the pub for trivia or to a dinner party with friends, I like getting out, i like having people to hang out with, i just sort of need a certain kind of crowd to hang around with, people who know games and pop culture, geeks to the highest degree, but they're also introverted and are therefore hard to spot

i'm a surprisingly Likeable and Congenial fellow who's easy to get along with and easy to like, i'm not unapproachable, just don't expect me to warm up to you as quickly as others would, and i'm much more comfortable typing my conversations than talking, though once i'm comfortable around new people they find me to be a verbose individual and a voracious conversationalist.

So i prefer my alone time and despise wasteful disturbances, i'm not the only man who would rather read a good book than go to the latest jersey shore imitation nightclub.

 

[someonehairy-ish]

I know both unsociable and sociable people who are assholes
I know both unsociable and sociable people who are pleasant

As long as you're not in the first group, you're fine.

I personally like to keep most of my time to myself. I still find that I have enough good friends to stay happy.

 

[Dubiousduke]

I've never seen anyone being insulted for enjoying their own company. In your examples it seems the people are implying not that you've chosen differently than them, but that you're unable to get what they have.

People don't shame virgins because they haven't had sex, but because they seemingly can't get it.

That was very eloquently nutshelled.