why was crystal skull sooo bad?

[Rajin Cajun]

Two things off the top of my head. The CGI blew ass and half the time was unnecessary and the Russian Accents were utter shit.

Only a minor problem was the Nuke Proof Fridge.

 

[Grigori361]

I don't hate it, but then I never really liked the original Indiana Jones movies either. I think it's a "meh" movie at best, but then I think all of the movies were "meh" at best too.

I thought the nuclear blast+ fridge was a hilarious touch, but I can totally see how offended anyone who takes this movie seriously would become. But I mean really, the earlier movies had to do with drinking from the holy grail, and uncovering the super powerful ark of the covenant (Which I believe historically was just a large battery that would give you quite the "buzz" and make you think you were talking to god, kinda like mushrooms.), and killing nazis.

So it only makes sense that the soviets (who because they don't get on well with the US) are obviously EVIL, forget that without them the Nazis would have won ww2.. and aliens? well I suppose that was the next logical step, hey maybe next time Harrison ford as indiana will end up in a transformers movie?

 

[Nazulu]

So many people are bashing movies for petty things these days. Who cares if you couldn't really survive a nuke in a fridge... who cares Shia LaBouf is a bad actor (it's not an award winning movie lol) who cares that the ending sucked... It was a GOOD movie overall. Different doesn't mean crappy.

It wasn't different, it was just crap compared to the others and corney, cliched, lame story and nothing special about it. In fact it is a pretty crap film all together and was just amde to make some quick money and thats it. Just like the 3rd Shrek.

I think South Park summed it up pretty well, RAPE of a good movie series!

 

[similar.squirrel]

Mostly fanboyism. People don't like their nostalgia to be diddled with. Much like my reactionary..reaction to the Watchmen film.
I sort of liked Crystal Skull, aside from the fact that I polished off two packets of pistachios whilst watching it and felt quite ill afterwards. That's obviously the director's fault.

 

[cyrad]

I think the reason was that it took away the key components to Indiana Jones' premise.

Every prior Indiana Jones had the protagonist track down a relic sacred to some religion for the sake of benefiting society while the enemy seeks it for wealth, a journey that ultimately lands him inside some trap-filled tomb while the antagonists.

Crystal Skull has Indiana Jones seek a non-religious relic and a place to put the relic, not to benefit mankind, but to prevent the enemy from using it as a military weapon, a very cliche concept. Also, there wasn't much of Indiana Jone scaling some musty old tomb, which was a key component to the appeal of the series.

The bottom line is, the new Indiana Jones movie diverted from what made the series appealing.

 

[johnman]

Meh I've never been a huge fan of Indy, i was born to late I think, and I was James Bond all the way

 

[BehattedWanderer]

It had nothing to do with it being about aliens that ruined it for me. That I could have lived with. What killed it for me was that it went from a series of stories that depicted the almighty power of God against those who would stand in heresy of him, and, having produced a series of movies of epic proportions, moved onto something else, like George Lucas loves to turn to: BAD Science. The nuclear-resistant fridge, the magnetic properties of gunpowder, the fact that if there was a magnet strong enough to pull finite grain particles from across a warehouse, if Indy was able to pull the shovel directly off of the magnet, it would immediately have sliced straight through his legs from the pull of the magnet. It was all BULLSHIT, point and fact. The acting was shite, the character design was dodgy at best, and that they're still relying on the old standbys was a good sign that they should have rethought much of it. That they moved away from the core principles of God's holy power is one thing, and the appearance of interdimensional aliens did make a unique twist on the world's crystal skulls, an odd and currently unexplainable phenomonon. But, bad acting, bad characters, bad dialog, and foremost, horrendous science were really the nails in its coffin for me.

 

[Benny Blanco]

Ze Russians, The Aliens, Ray Winstone and The Ridiculous Ants.

 

[Baby Tea]

People didn't like it because they didn't understand that Indiana Jones is a tribute to the over the top adventure heroes of the 20s. Everything was meant to be impossible, crazy, and, yes, campy. Does anyone want to actually go back and watch the first 3 films with the same level of critique as they did this new one?

Lets!

Raiders of the Lost Ark:
Ark of the Covenant? Shooting lasers and melting faces?
Indy being able to sneak aboard a U-Boat as it sails the sea and not get found out?
Being able to 'infiltrate' a Nazi base by himself and not be noticed?
Temples that have motion sensing spike traps? And giant rolling balls, that he can outrun?
Pushing a huge giant stone statue over that knocks out a wall and just so happens to find a way out?
Indy taking out an entire squad of Nazis in a truck?
Riding behind said truck while holding onto his whip?

Bullshit on all that. I'm sure there is more, but I'll move on

Temple of Doom:
Voodoo Magic? Hypnotizing voodoo magic? That is 'cured' with fire?
Guy pulling hearts out of people? And they are still alive?
Little Chinese kids beating up adults?
The entire mining cart chase scene?
Magic glowing stones?
Falling out of a plane on an inflatable raft?? And surviving?
And then falling down a waterfall? And surviving, and landing right side up with no injuries?


Bullshit on all that too! Next!

Last Crusade:
A secret group whose only job is to protect the cup of Christ that grants anyone who drinks of it eternal life?
Infiltrating a nazi castle stronghold with a terrible Scottish accent? And escaping? From nazis who don't like to shoot their guns? Especially when they are right behind you on a bike, but think it's best to be right next to you before trying to shoot?
Using a flag pole, that ripped so easily out of the ground, to lance some guy?
Out-flying the Luftwaffe with your accident prone father who shoots off your own tailfin? (Super bullshit there)
Killing planes with birds? When the guy didn't even have to dive that low? And could have pulled up far sooner?
Destroying a tank gun with a ROCK??
Ancient, motion sensing traps?
And a cup that turns you into that guy from the crypt keeper and then you poof away into dust?

Bullshit on all that too.

Don't you come to me with Indy in a fridge and aliens, and tell me that doesn't fit with Indy's over-the-top action and story telling. Because you've either never watched the other three, you're just jumping on the 'hate Indy 4' band wagon because you're insecure, or you have no idea what Indy is about. Indy isn't about realism. He's the old-fashion, good old boy action hero who encounters and conquers all of mans myths, legends, and fears.
If you want realism, go somewhere else.

 

[brewbeard]

Aliens.

Refrigerator.

Praerie Dogs.

Indiana Jones riding ***** to Shia laBeouf.

Shia laBeouf (sp?) and his Tarzan maneuver.

Aliens.

The end of the movie.

"Passing the Hat."

 

[Jharry5]

It wasn't that it was awful, because I thought it was functional. But that's the problem; it just didn't recapture the feel of the originals. It deviated from the religious/mysticism of the first three for the sci-fi approach. I also think that the *ahem* 'scientific' parts - especially the fridge scene - are the biggest complaint people have with it...

 

[AdmiralWolverineLightningbolt]

It had nothing to do with it being about aliens that ruined it for me. That I could have lived with. What killed it for me was that it went from a series of stories that depicted the almighty power of God against those who would stand in heresy of him, and, having produced a series of movies of epic proportions, moved onto something else, like George Lucas loves to turn to: BAD Science. The nuclear-resistant fridge, the magnetic properties of gunpowder, the fact that if there was a magnet strong enough to pull finite grain particles from across a warehouse, if Indy was able to pull the shovel directly off of the magnet, it would immediately have sliced straight through his legs from the pull of the magnet. It was all BULLSHIT, point and fact. The acting was shite, the character design was dodgy at best, and that they're still relying on the old standbys was a good sign that they should have rethought much of it. That they moved away from the core principles of God's holy power is one thing, and the appearance of interdimensional aliens did make a unique twist on the world's crystal skulls, an odd and currently unexplainable phenomonon. But, bad acting, bad characters, bad dialog, and foremost, horrendous science were really the nails in its coffin for me.

People didn't like it because they didn't understand that Indiana Jones is a tribute to the over the top adventure heroes of the 20s. Everything was meant to be impossible, crazy, and, yes, campy. Does anyone want to actually go back and watch the first 3 films with the same level of critique as they did this new one?

Lets!

Raiders of the Lost Ark:
Ark of the Covenant? Shooting lasers and melting faces?
Indy being able to sneak aboard a U-Boat as it sails the sea and not get found out?
Being able to 'infiltrate' a Nazi base by himself and not be noticed?
Temples that have motion sensing spike traps? And giant rolling balls, that he can outrun?
Pushing a huge giant stone statue over that knocks out a wall and just so happens to find a way out?
Indy taking out an entire squad of Nazis in a truck?
Riding behind said truck while holding onto his whip?

Bullshit on all that. I'm sure there is more, but I'll move on

Temple of Doom:
Voodoo Magic? Hypnotizing voodoo magic? That is 'cured' with fire?
Guy pulling hearts out of people? And they are still alive?
Little Chinese kids beating up adults?
The entire mining cart chase scene?
Magic glowing stones?
Falling out of a plane on an inflatable raft?? And surviving?
And then falling down a waterfall? And surviving, and landing right side up with no injuries?


Bullshit on all that too! Next!

Last Crusade:
A secret group whose only job is to protect the cup of Christ that grants anyone who drinks of it eternal life?
Infiltrating a nazi castle stronghold with a terrible Scottish accent? And escaping? From nazis who don't like to shoot their guns? Especially when they are right behind you on a bike, but think it's best to be right next to you before trying to shoot?
Using a flag pole, that ripped so easily out of the ground, to lance some guy?
Out-flying the Luftwaffe with your accident prone father who shoots off your own tailfin? (Super bullshit there)
Killing planes with birds? When the guy didn't even have to dive that low? And could have pulled up far sooner?
Destroying a tank gun with a ROCK??
Ancient, motion sensing traps?
And a cup that turns you into that guy from the crypt keeper and then you poof away into dust?

Bullshit on all that too.

Don't you come to me with Indy in a fridge and aliens, and tell me that doesn't fit with Indy's over-the-top action and story telling. Because you've either never watched the other three, you're just jumping on the 'hate Indy 4' band wagon because you're insecure, or you have no idea what Indy is about. Indy isn't about realism. He's the old-fashion, good old boy action hero who encounters and conquers all of mans myths, legends, and fears.
If you want realism, go somewhere else.

BehattedWanderer should feel kind of embarrassed right now...

 

[CaptainCrunch]

Fanboy Rant:
Classic characters made into stupid whiny teenagers is doomed to fail with fanboys. They obviously make a killing by killing our childhood, so there's nothing we can do to stop them. In the waterfall scene, I had to stop myself from shouting at the screen: "Chewie, turn on the auxiliary power!" Borrowing gags from other films you've made is a mark of fan abuse.

Filmmaker Rant:
The action-packed roller coaster thrill ride lacked something very essential to the adventure film: a moral. We get one at the very end, but from scene to scene it's mostly a wank-fest of imposed family values on people who haven't seen each other in years. Random chance is one thing, and adventure movies thrive on blind luck, but it's a series of scenes that are forced to fit together only by the will of the director (who has a history of doing just that.)

 

[zeroharpuia]

Because Lost Arc, Temple of Doom and Last Crusade were AWESOME.

(And because of that fridge)

 

[Charisma]

@Baby Tea

It's not the realism, it's the themes. Extradimensional aliens = science fiction. It doesn't fit.

And for me, at least, it's the level of sincerity. #2 and #4 were both very goofy and overdone, from start to finish. Nothing to indicate that we're watching something more than just a live-action cartoon intended for kids and the mentally challenged.

#1 and #3 both had many of the same goofy, campy shenanigans, yes. However, there were moments suggesting something bigger than that - something mysterious and deeply spiritual, like the Last Crusade Grail theme. As if to say, "Yeah there's a lot of fun action and corny one-liners here, but underneath it, there's real, serious shit going on."

And the result of the seriousness was that it was easier to suspend disbelief about all the sensationalist action.

Indiana Jones for me isn't about the goofiness and the action, so when everything BUT the goofiness and the action is taken out, it just seems so trivial and childish.

Also, why can't I post about this without ranting?

 

[DrDeath3191]

I didn't think it was a terrible film. Certainly not great, but good.

 

[ConnorCool]

it was just like the originals, and I liked it. it wasnt the best film in the world, but neither was it the greatest, roll on Indie 5 8]

 

[Player 2]

It's because it wasn't based around religion and religious artefacts like the other films were (very loosely). It was too sci-fi.