Worst Book Ever?

[MadCapMunchkin]

"The Scarlet Letter" by Nathaniel Hawthorne. Why? Because he uses twelve pages (and I'm barely exaggerating) to describe a woman, quite literally WALKING THROUGH A DOOR! *wallbanger*

 

[thethingthatlurks]

On a less serious note:

Spoiler: The Bible

Ah, I believe he was supposed to be referring to The Secret though. Same difference, really.

I don't think so. Read the last bit of the first paragraph again, it mentions the exodus, and the whole surviving on manna alone. Don't think that was in The Secret...

 

[Ramin 123]

The Ask by Sam Lipsyte. How anyone can make it to the first chapter is beyond me

 

[the rye]

I'm quite amazed that people have shrugged quite a few classics off as bad.

 

[ABLb0y]

I would say Twilight, but its been done to death, so I'm gunna say anything by Katy Price. Why is she famous, again?

 

[elbrandino]

Honestly you had to be expecting Twilight to be said a million times here. I say the same thing. I picked up the first book once, read the first chapter, said "No" and threw it at wall.

 

[Wade-DeadPool]

Pffft. You haven't seen horrible until you've seen Maradonia and the Seven Bridges [http://impishidea.com/Humor/528/maradonia-sporkings-part-one]. It's a self-published brick of a fantasy novel written by a teenage girl with no sense of grammar, punctuation, or story.

I will have too lokk that up, sounds like a sort of funny thing to read, if you don't read it in a serius way.

"Naked Lunch" offended me on every level that a book can offend the reader without using racial slurs.

I have only seen the movie, but i must give that book a look too.

Easily the Marquis de Sade's "Salo or the 120 Days of Sodom". Horrible reading, and it's not even completed by the said author.

Close second is Mein Kampf by you-know-who.

120 Days of Sodom is a really strange book, but if you are in the right mood, you will have a sort of "Sweet Jesus" feeling whene you read it.

I would like to have a look in to Mein Kampf.. I have heard that it is a really bad book.

 

[tehfeen83]

The Book With No Name by Anonymous. Embarrassingly wanna-be cool, Tarantino rip off. Utter shat.

 

[Death-of-Penguins]

Well... True enough, Twilight was bad, I've heard on good authority (couldn't read more than the first one) that they get worse. Oh, wait, didn't Meyer write a book about a character that was only in the main series for three minutes?

Anyway, the book I found most boring was Great Expectations, Dickens. I like some of Dickens other works, but that one... Was so dull... Next to nothing happened.

And the last Harry Potter book. I loved the series as a kid, and I still hold a soft spot for it, but... Fetch quest, crappy epilogue that doesn't even let the reader decide what happens to the characters, and killing off the best characters for no reason.
Did I care when Harry died? Like hell. But Hedwig? Colin Creevey? Fred. She gets no points for that. And then his girlfriend replaces him with his twin? Shallow much. Urgh

I love books, don't get me wrong, but some wind me right up.

 

[the Dept of Science]

Kurt Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse Five".

I fell asleep reading it three times out of pure boredom, lack of prose, and the inability to be entertaining. Literary classic my ass...

*fanboy rage*
The distinct writing style served to underline the message the book tried to convey: war sucks, tragedies suck, but ultimately we can't prevent them. Let's just move on, etc...
That's also why the Tralfalmadorians are included. They serve as the antithesis to this, being completely aware of their own demise, yet unwilling to counteract that.
*/fanboy rage*
But who am I to criticize the literary choices of others?

I read that the Tralfalmadorians were meant to parody that uncaring "well, it doesn't matter in the large scheme of things" viewpoint. Thats why he wrote them as silly looking aliens, and every death, from the most emotional to the most trivial (the wine going flat) get the same uncaring remark: "so it goes".

 

[HaloHappy]

"The Bridge of San Luis Ray" was the worst book I was ever forced to read. If you've read it or seen the movie, you'd know.

 

[GonzoGamer]

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. Pathetic excuse for drama and romance, with moral values and themes that were outdated when they were written, nevermind now.

Yea, her ongoing popularity makes me dread that Fabio books will be "classics" in a couple hundred years.

For me, I would have to say Spellfire by Ed (or is it Al) Greenwood is probably one of the worst books I've ever read. I enjoyed all the other Forgotten Realms books my friend had lent me but that one was really horribly contrived and tedious. The characters were really 2dimensional too.
It was like the author decided to publish a D&D campaign he DMed when he was 8.

 

[Frenger]

I bet most of the posters haven't read the books mentioned. Especially Twilight. People hate that book by principle.

Anyway. I hate Old man and the sea. Bored me to death and ruined reading for me for years to come. Now, however, I enjoy Hemingways other stories, but I will never pick that one up again!

I disagree somewhat. It was a lovely novella. What didn't you like aboot it?

It did not pull me in, I guess that was the problem. I simply could not relate to it. But it was 12 years ago, maybe I should give it a shot.



Pull me in... haha!

 

[zHellas]

The Book With No Name by Anonymous. Embarrassingly wanna-be cool, Tarantino rip off. Utter shat.

After reading a description on Amazon.com...

I honestly wanna read that book.

The premise sounds pretty interesting(bit silly, though).

Gonna give it a try. And I can totally see what you mean by "Tarantino rip-off" just by reading the description.

 

[havass]

"Justin Bieber: My Story"

ALSO Twilight and anything involving spies (Aside from Chekists)

This post could have practically /thread

Though in it's defense. Twilight wasn't THAT bad..
Okay fine they were. I'll direct you to my favourite Twilight review ever.

Spoiler: Check out the catalogue. It is gold.

http://otahyoni.livejournal.com/130432.html

 

[Nimcha]

The worst book I have ever read was some book I had to read for my Dutch literature class. I don't even remember the title, I've tried forgetting everything about it. I only remember it took me three weeks to get through the first chapter but I had to plow on.

Dutch literature is horrible as a whole, in fact.

 

[Sensenmann]

I'd say Twilight for being a rather 2d story, but I won't. It gets teens reading. One day they're reading Twilight, the next they may be reading Dracula, then maybe normal fiction (I say maybe to avoid a slippery slope fallacy, but this actually happened to me, through the ages of 15-present, so from books like Twilight to currently Primo Levi's The Periodic Table). So it has worth, even if it did kill vampires.

My worst book would be Eon by Greg Bear. It's about a TARDIS-like comet with another plot of a ghostly-world. Turns out it's about one chappy in American History - not even a well known one. I could also say Albert Camus' The Plague, but I actually finished that one.

 

[mikecoulter]

I think any autobiography by UK "celebrities" could just be burned and nobody would notice.

I'm reading Frankie Boyle's autobiography right now, actually. He's a Scottish comedian, though I don't think he comes under 'celebrities' in the way you meant it.

It's not a great literary work, and the parts where he inserts his own scripts and monologues I skipped, they were rather dull. It's by no means a bad book...just...not as funny as I'd hoped.

Nonono, I didn't mean people with an actual talent haha.

 

[KissofKetchup]

"Justin Bieber: My Story"
[image snip]
ALSO Twilight and anything involving spies (Aside from Chekists)

Anything with spies? That pretty rules out anything by Tom Clancy. Those may not be the best books ever written, but they're not shit.

Umm... and also Ian Fleming? Jesus... possibly the greatest spy novelist ever and you think of Tom Clancy first? He's written some great books sure but there's not a bad book writtten by Fleming. Partly cause he drew on his own life as inspiration, sure but still,
Ian frigging Fleming! Also, I quite like some of Rachel Caine's works...
-Tabs<3-
P.S people saying Twilight... you're cheating in my honest opinion.
Worst book I've read would most likely have to be the Mass effect novels.
In particular, Ascension.
Drew Karpyshyn really is a hack writer.

Ian Fleming pretty much goes without saying though...

 

[Daedalus1942]

"Justin Bieber: My Story"
[image snip]
ALSO Twilight and anything involving spies (Aside from Chekists)

Anything with spies? That pretty rules out anything by Tom Clancy. Those may not be the best books ever written, but they're not shit.

Umm... and also Ian Fleming? Jesus... possibly the greatest spy novelist ever and you think of Tom Clancy first? He's written some great books sure but there's not a bad book writtten by Fleming. Partly cause he drew on his own life as inspiration, sure but still,
Ian frigging Fleming! Also, I quite like some of Rachel Caine's works...
-Tabs<3-
P.S people saying Twilight... you're cheating in my honest opinion.
Worst book I've read would most likely have to be the Mass effect novels.
In particular, Ascension.
Drew Karpyshyn really is a hack writer.

Ian Fleming pretty much goes without saying though...

But you said anything with spies. Fleming's work would fall under that category most assuredly.
The difference is he actually lived it, hence why he was able to make it so realistic and believable in his books.
A quality that Daniel Craig has almost but not quite brought to the film series.
-Tabs<3-
-edit- disregard "you said anything with spies" that was aimed at the guy that you quoted...