Worst lines of dialogue you've heard?

[Jack Joe Tip Toe]

So what is the worst line of dialogue you've heard?

Mine is from a movie called New Jack City.

"I wanna shoot you so bad my dick is hard!"

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

I remember Schwarzenegger movie where the bad guy tells him "fuck you, asshole" and Arnie replies "fuck you, asshole", like it's the most clever thing in the world. Don't remember the name of the movie though.

 

[RickyChinese]

"Forget it Horowitz you'll never make pilot like your father did. You're too fat, kid. You'd never fit in the cockpit. Your old man would be crying into his beer if he hadn't been killed by your stepdad, Charles. If the old man wasn't worm food and he saw you trying to be what he was -- a fighter pilot, top gun-- he would laugh himself into the funny farm. The kind of laugh where there's no mirth in the eyes and it's all you can do not to eat a gun. Y'know, hollow! Pardon me while I go shit out my soul."

 

[twistedmic]

I remember Schwarzenegger movie where the bad guy tells him "fuck you, asshole" and Arnie replies "fuck you, asshole", like it's the most clever thing in the world. Don't remember the name of the movie though.

That sounds similar to 'The Terminator'. A character early on in the movie tells Arnie (the Terminator) "Fuck you, asshole." and Arnie uses the same sentence towards someone else later in the movie.

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

I remember Schwarzenegger movie where the bad guy tells him "fuck you, asshole" and Arnie replies "fuck you, asshole", like it's the most clever thing in the world. Don't remember the name of the movie though.

That sounds similar to 'The Terminator'. A character early on in the movie tells Arnie (the Terminator) "Fuck you, asshole." and Arnie uses the same sentence towards someone else later in the movie.

Here it is, it's Commando (1985)


I wonder now if this was a reference to Terminator (made a year before). That would make the quote suck a little less.

 

[The Wykydtron]

A lot of the old Arnie films are like this. It's practically why I like them so much really.

Kindergarden Cop. He gets so freaked out by kids being loud he just screams "SHUT UP!" at them for a good 10 seconds. Then runs outside the school and screams "GAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

So bad, it's priceless.


1:20 or so. Fuckin' 'ell. It's hilarious.

 

[Jack Joe Tip Toe]

Here's another one.

Sidekick: *sarcastically* "I'll meet you at the club in an hour."
Protagonist: "I got way laid."
Sidekick: "No you got La-laid!"

 

[Magicite Spring]

I haven't heard a line as hilariously bad and poorly delivered than this one.


Its so bad, I love it!

 

[ItouKaiji]

Most all of the Dexter's internal dialogue this season. It's always completely redundant and pointless but sometimes can be unintentionally funny. My favorite:

?Galuzzo isn?t killing people to threaten Vogel. Because he?s eating them. Which means he would want to keep the brain so he could eat it. Because he eats people. Garlic sauce.?

 

[Silvanus]

Mark: "People are very strange these days. I used to know a girl. She had a dozen guys. One of them found out about it, beat her up so bad she ended up in a hospital on Guerrero Street".

Johnny: "Ha ha ha, what a story, Mark!"

 

[Soviet Heavy]

From a pretty bad Dragon Age 2 comic that somehow got published.

Qunari: "You didn't make them slaves."
Isabella: "I didn't, I made them dead."

 

[Dirty Hipsters]

That line from the first episode of RWBY. If you've seen the episode you'll know what line I'm talking about without me having to write it out.


edit: Seems the video isn't loading for some reason. The line is exactly 9 minutes into the first episode for those who are interested.

 

[Kitsune Hunter]

Pretty much this line from Fate/Stay Night gets me every time

Spoiler: Remember kids

Shows Girls, any line will do although my personal favourites being "You're going to jump to your conclusion, without your golden parachute" and "Man everybody got AIDS and shit"

 

[Clowndoe]

My fave is this one:

 

[ninjaRiv]

Splinter Cell: Conviction: "If you're the ghost of the museum, you'll die a second time!"

 

[RJ 17]

Mark: "People are very strange these days. I used to know a girl. She had a dozen guys. One of them found out about it, beat her up so bad she ended up in a hospital on Guerrero Street".

Johnny: "Ha ha ha, what a story, Mark!"

No fair bringing up Tommy Wiseua! EVERY line from that movie is the worst line of dialogue in history.

Spoiler: Well, I take that back...there is ONE epic line that can never be put down...you know the one:

Another movie where every other line is just god-awful (mostly due to god-awful acting) is Broken Arrow. That movie was so bad it gave me cancer.

Buuuuut for my own, specific submission for this topic,

Spoiler: Brought to you by good ol' Silvester Stallone:

YOU'RE TEARING ME APART, JUDGE DREDD!

 

[HeavenSmile]

Vince Vaughn in The Cell:

"There's one thing I know for certain. If we can't stop him, he ain't going to stop himself"

When great detective work meets great writing....

 

[Mikeyfell]

That line from the first episode of RWBY. If you've seen the episode you'll know what line I'm talking about without me having to write it out.

I always thought that line should have been "I don't want to be any part of a bee"


OT: The worst like I can think of is from one of the best written games I've ever played.
It's in chapter 4 of Record of Agarest War

"They've turned all woman kind against them."
God dammit Qua you were doing so well, and you blew it

That whole scene is the weakest part of that game.

 

[AphliKshun]

From Diablo 3 "Rakanoth, do not fail me, or your fate will be the same as Iskatu's and my brothers'."
might not be the worst but I cringe every time I hear it.

 

[saintdane05]

"The evil pizzas were no match for a simple stop-light."
No, I'm not going to give context.