Worst Pick-up lines

[molester jester]

Hey does this smell like chloroform to you ?

Me - You want to get a pizza and then fuck
Her - No
Me- What you don't like pizza ?

If i could rearrange the alphabet i would put rape and your family together.

One day one of these will work.

 

[Kimarous]

Nice legs. What time do they open?

 

[Shock and Awe]

Well seeing as pick up lines in general suck ass.....I'll go with all of them.

 

[Amethyst Wind]

"Hey, is your dad a thief? Because that's totally my jetta parked out front."

Apple for reference (healthier than cookie)

 

[SovietSecrets]

My friend still holds top rank on this. He was talking to a girl in our math class and uttered the most famous line "Man you really suck at math, you should let me come over to tutor you". Greatest. Line. Ever.

 

[Jake0fTrades]

Excuse me, does this smell like Chloroform?

 

[shootthebandit]

I like my women like I like my coffee, in a plastic cup. -Eddie Izzard

i like my women like my coffee,
roasted, ground and freeze dried - me

 

[ScRaT_the_destroyer]

So ...(dramatic pause)... Why haven't we had sex yet?

 

[shootthebandit]

seriously heres a few

is your surname Mcdonald? because im lovin it

me: do you sing in the shower
her: yes
me: how about a duet?

 

[CJ1145]

"Did you fall from heaven? Because your spine is fucked up."

"They say your true love is a lot like your mother *holds up picture of teenage mother* The resemblance is uncanny! *If she strikes me:* My goodness, I think I'm in love!"

 

[ajofflight]

Just go up to a nice girl with a handkerchief, and say "does this rag smell like chloroform to you?" they laugh 98% of the time.

 

[SimuLord]

How do you do, I see you've met my faithful handyman.

 

[Berethond]

"Um...so I was wondering...if maybe you'd...liketogotothedancewithme?!"
Didn't quite work.

It's always worth trying. My friend simply smiles at a girl and says "Let's Dance". He says straight to the point works well. Then again he is quite the dancer.

I usually smile and say, "would you like to dance?"

That works amazingly well. I'd say 99.7% of the time. I have a killer smile.

 

[JWW]

"If it's a lesson in love, watch out. I suffer from a very sexy learning disability."

"How about I help you finish that dream you were having about me?"

"I'm sensing a very sensual disturbance in the force. Prepare for ship-to-ship intimacy."

All from Captain Zapp Brannigan. You could probably just link a list of his quotes and /thread.

 

[ShoopDaToaster]

'Hey,I have candy in my van if you want any.'

 

[sofrekinbored]

For halo 3 Is my auto aim messed up cause i cant take my eyes off you
Is this assault cause your the bomb
I press RB to board enemy vehicle does that work with you too
From hawtymcbloggy

 

[ShoopDaToaster]

Teh newb question-
WHAT IS CLOROFORM?

Is it essence of Pedobear?

 

[Da Chi]

"Um...so I was wondering...if maybe you'd...liketogotothedancewithme?!"
Didn't quite work.

It's always worth trying. My friend simply smiles at a girl and says "Let's Dance". He says straight to the point works well. Then again he is quite the dancer.

I usually smile and say, "would you like to dance?"

That works amazingly well. I'd say 99.7% of the time. I have a killer smile.

It's near fool proof. Girls like to dance and don't want lame lines to go with it. I've danced with plenty of girls but I'm a terrible dancer so i usually stay off the dance floor and talk to girls outside having smokes.

 

[ScRaT_the_destroyer]

Roses are red
violets are blue
get in the van
or i kill you

 

[The Paradigm]

"Are you a doctor? Wanna f**k?"
Seriously.