You have a resurrection machine

Burig

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Nov 8, 2010
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Does the person you want to revive have to be dead? Or can it bring back another of them at 20?
If so...
Sacrifice: Ricky Gervais, and four members of that american family that goes to soldiers funerals and protests that "god hates fags"
Bring back: Stephen Hawking

or if you can't bring back someone who's already alive, then...Steve Jobs
as much as I dislike Apple, it's lost something without him.
 

DJ_DEnM

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Dec 22, 2010
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Bhaalspawn said:
Sacrifice


Sethisto
Oh you.


OT: I did this topic like, a year ago, so my answer will remain the same: Sacrifice Chuck Norris, bring back Bruce Lee. Though I need four more people...

How many are there in One Direction?
 

DuelLadyS

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Aug 25, 2010
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Tony said:
I would revive someone who would absolutely revive me in turn. I'd probably sacrifice the next people on death row.
Not caring about getting brought back myself, personally, but the second part is pure brilliance. Think about it- we trade the world's condemned, people who were going to die either way, and revive some of the world's best- or just people who were killed by the people we're tossing into the machine. You could even revive people from unsolved cases to have them find their original killers!

I'd bring back Freddie Mercury. Seems frivlous compared to, say, Leonardo DaVinci, but I think the classical geniuses might not fare as well in today's society. Music brings the world together... we can always use that. (I might even plot to kill off the remaining members of Queen so everyone can come back at the same time. 40 more years!)
 

vashthblackseed

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Start a Scientology like cult for rich, eccentric older (but otherwise health) people. 5 cultist provide a "donation" the one i like the best, most influential and/or provided the largest donation get the resurrection.

When people ask where the other four went, explain that they clearly could not accept the "true nature of life and death" so Death took them.
 

Sethzard

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Dec 22, 2007
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I'd probably sacrifice death row inmates, Justin Bieber, fox news casters, the cast of the Jersey Shore, the Jordy Shore and other shows like that.
I would probably resurrect Richard P. Feynman, Einstein, Turing and some other great scientific minds.
 

King of Asgaard

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Oct 31, 2011
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I'd sacrifice:
  • Bobby Kotick
    All of Zynga's execs
    All of Activision's execs
    All of EA's execs
    Every single person from reality tv
    The person who wrote Twilight books (Stephanie Meyer) and all the actors who played its characters in the movies.
    Jersey Shore
    Geordie Shore
    The Only Way Is Essex
    Made in Chelsea
    Justin Bieber
    Chris Brown
    Nicki Minaj
    Ray William Johnson

To bring back:
  • Mako
    Tony Jay
    George Carlin
    Ronnie James Dio
    Elvis Presley
    Carl Sagan
I probably sacrificed more people than I used to resurrect the above, but fuck it, I'm doing the world a service.
captcha: fast and loose
 

Shoggoth2588

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I would set up a quest specific for a party of five and entice them to enter my glorious machine of immortality with a cake or something. When the all go inside, I will come back out. I'm sorry but screw historical figures, I want to live forever.
 

Human Centipede

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Aug 4, 2012
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Sacrifice Congress and David Cameron and bring back Hitler so I can laugh at his stupid facial hair. It's just been one of these weird dreams of mine.
 

namhorFnodroG

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Nov 2, 2011
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So... If i killed somebody, I'll make and then resurrect them again, would that make the person 20 again? Why not just get like a group of sucicidal people, and charge them money for a quick "End". Sacrifice 5 of them, resurrect one of them, charge the person money for making him/her 20 again, repeat. I'd be swimming in cash! :D

ohgodimterrible.
 

C F

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Could I get away with using five perfectly healthy inmates on death row? Oh, I see someone already went with that [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.384239-You-have-a-resurrection-machine#15234319].

Well considering the ethical dilemma implicit in this question, a cop-out answer like that is cheating a bit anyway. So I suppose I'd have to come up with an actual five man answer. Let's see...

I see everyone's trying the whole "make the world a better place" thing, but why in all that is cheese-filled pizza crust are you going for people like corporate executives? Or overrated hollywood stars? That's stupid. That's petty targeting based on nothing more than personal annoyances and vendettas.
I don't see people considering that the higher-ups of Electronic Arts might just be nice people even if they don't see eye-to-eye with us and have some mis-conceptions about things. That they aren't soulless; they're just doing their jobs.

But nope. Evidently they deserve to die for their marketing practices. Alright. I can roll with that. Because eventually that's what it all comes down to, isn't it? You're choosing which people get selectively eliminated for what you either perceive to be for humanity's benefit, or simply for personal reasons. To that end, I'm going to select these people because I want to:
> Holmes, the nutjob most likely behind the Aurora Massacre. It's not often I get emotionally struck by murders I hear about, but for whatever reason this one genuinely got to me. If I had the option to personally throw this guy into a time-flux to resurrect a dead person with no other consequences, I'd do it. And not because he's a murderer, but because he makes me feel sad.

> Ingrid Newkirk, founder and president of People for Ethical Treatment of Animals. Her heart's probably in the right place, but I disagree with her, her goals, and her organization. Animals are animals, ma'am. If you want all animals to be treated the same as your fellow man, I'm going to treat you like an animal. For little reason other than the heck of it. Into the machine with you.

> Barack Obama. What happens when you sacrifice the President of the United States to a time-flux with presumably no trace of his 'demise'? How will Secret Service react? How (or with what) will the news networks of America cover that story? Will Joe Biden be a better or worse president for the next six months? You have to admit, Social Sciences have never been this fun.

> Carl Sagan. Whoa man, we're pushing it now. But seriously, if we get a time-defying machine, I want to throw a renowned scientist into it. Because I think it would be funny.
...And yeah, that's all it boils down to.
Sorry Sagan. You're leaving humanity for my amusement.

> Me. I could abuse this machine to no end; sacrificing people by the boatloads to get better parking or not have to wait in line. But in the end, I have to ask myself: would I subject others to this unknown fate if I wasn't willing to do so myself?
The answer is no.
For science, ladies and gentlemen. But don't feel obligated to remember me. And at the very least, I get to talk to these people while in purgatory (or whatever) and find out with the ultimate hindsight whose life views and philosophies are the best (except for Holmes, he may not have any). That would be awesome.

...And, yeah. I have my five. There's just one matter of business left. Who do I actually revive? Someone flip a coin. Heads: Genghis Khan.
Tails: Nikola Tesla. Either way, there are so many things that we could set the record straight on.
 

NightHawk21

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rEvolution said:
Does this machine eliminate the possibility of resurrecting those used to power it?
What specifically does this machine take from a person to operate?
Is it soul powered?

I lack much of a conscience; so I'd start with the lowest IQ's and use them to resurrect the highest IQ's.

I'd do that until the Average IQ has gone up by a good 10 points.

I'd also throw a few dogs in there; see what sort of crazy man/dog hybrid I can make.
Well apart from the obvious response that IQ has no bearing on intelligence, you probably don't understand how IQs work.

There is also the Flynn effect to consider where a score of 140 on an IQ test 50 years ago is only about 100-ish now.
 

ThePenguinKnight

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Mar 30, 2012
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Glenn Beck
Rush Limbaugh
Bill O'reilly
Fred Phelps
Shirley Phelps

To resurrect either Bruce Lee (If he'd be cured of his medical problems), Carl Sagan, or really any scientific mind that could help.
 

AngloDoom

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Aug 2, 2008
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I would become the guardian of the device, and the moment that David Attenborough dies the next five people I see are going in the machine. I would also make sure someone keeps me alive via the same process to continue the cycle.

I refuse to let that man die!
 

Username Redacted

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Dec 29, 2010
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Are you a prison inmate convicted of a violent crime who has exhausted the appeals process?
Are you a member of the United States Congress, British or Australian Parliaments?
Are you a member of a state (USA only) house or senate who have served 3+ terms in office?
Have you appeared on 2+ seasons of reality television?
Have you served as a producer for 2+ Uwe Boll movies?
Have you produced or greenlight a TV program that appeared on TLC within the last 3 years?

If you answered 'Yes' to one or more of the above questions then please kindly get into the machine so that your life may be exchanged for human beings of worth who might actually contribute something of value to society.
 

Signa

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rhizhim said:
can we have historical figures with fictional talents/inventions?

like nikola tesla in the illusionist.(wont spoil, but if you have seen the movie you will know)
You can bring back Tesla, or Lincoln, but they won't be magical or vampire hunters.