Your personal one-liners!

[Beetlejooce]

When telling somebody to do something
'Do it or you'll be fishing penguins from your nostrils'

When your naval craft has bee plugged with torpedoes
'Damn these torpedoes'

 

[mangus]

When somebody does something so stupid they should be flogged, and said with ecstatic sarcasm: "WONDERFUL!". That there's how to stay sane(?) in the food service industry.

 

[chefassassin2]

Hey Mangus, I gotta say, I've usede that one a few times in the kitchens I've worked. I've been working in high-end kitchens for about 15 years and another fond one is when my chef tells me step-by-step how to make the simplest thing. As he's describing it, I just respond randomly as he's talking with, "Oh really, is that how you make it? Huh, had no idea." still makes me laugh to this day.

 

[xitel]

Well, I am partial to the exclamation: "Eat Die!" Just slipped out while I was playing BF: 1942 in Comp Sci and became my motto for a year.

 

[BallPtPenTheif]

"There are only two kinds of people that read Harry Potter; little boys and the men who fuck them."

*rim shot*

 

[Fronken]

I've always wanted to go to a restaurant/kiosk and tell them i want a hamburger, then when its almost done i yell: "Cheese it!", meaning i want cheese on my hamburger.

I know its lame as hell but i keep giggling everytime i think about it xD

 

[Aux117]

"Rock, Rock on."
I only say it when I agree with people, much like the Cheat Commandos who originally said it.

 

[Fudj]

i have a few:

1) If i throw this stick will you fuck off?
2) That Chick had a fanny like a wizards sleeve
3) He/She is so ugly they have a face like a dropped pie
4) Well fuck a duck! (my favorite at the mo)

found them randomly on a website one day and have used them ever since

 

[Crystal Cuckoo]

While playing Left 4 Dead as a Hunter, I climbed up a tree and pounced onto Zoey, while screaming,
"WHERE'S MY SAMMICH *****?"

 

[WolfThomas]

When I played COD WAW, I said some horrible things.

Eg: I flame thrower a Japanese officers for 10seconds straight, watch his charred corpse collapse. Then say coldly "That's one son that wont be rising!"

 

[SiliconKnight]

Well thats just a penis in the butt- any difficult situation

Shhh...I think I can hear my I.Q. dropping- coversation with any idiot

 

[Lunar Shadow]

*when somone does something wierd/bizarre"*

And that kids is why you don't drink the bong water




*After getting frustrated at trying to get someone's attention who is being really oblivious*
OI NUMBNUTS!

 

[Bulletinmybrain]

To everyone: I hate you.

 

[Tattaglia]

"Bangin' him like a screendoor in a hurricane."

I don't know where I got that, but it's very visual.

 

[Vivaldi]

Shhh...I think I can hear my I.Q. dropping- coversation with any idiot

Brilliant, can I use this?

 

[Nexus424]

Mine's a pick-up line.
"Excuse me, miss, does this wrag smell of chloroform?"

Ha ha that's both foul but classic at the same time

 

[Nexus424]

Actually one time last Winter I was walking home from school and some teenagers decided to ambush me into a snowball fight. They got me pretty good on my back a few times but when I returned fire it was over. I remember more specifically the part when I chucked a more-so colder than usual snowball towards them due to the fresh snow I planted around it (I call that a freeze Bomb). And it hit the person who started the ambush square in the sack and exploded all around him and under his hoodie resulting in a priceless look on his face. I looked in his direction and yelled out "Stay Frosty" then dashed off laughing and I have been saying it ever since.

 

[mokes310]

I've got another one.

When a woman pays me a compliment, I respond in Bender's voice, "CHYEAH BABY, I KNOW IT!"

 

[Bleak777]

My best is when a guy wanted to fight me. I kicked his ass pretty brutally and while he was on the ground I whipped it out and pissed all over him. Best one-liner ever.

 

[SovietSecrets]

I always end a conversation with friends like this: Keep yo game tight and your butt hole closed. First time i said it friends thought i was insane.