You're going to jail - one item with you

[Sansha]

I maintain that this is different from the desert island question.

So you're going to jail for the rest of your life without parole, bail, or opportunity to get out on good behavior. You're in there until you die. Under no circumstances whatsoever are you ever, ever leaving. The crime is up to you.

As part of the plea bargain, you are permitted to take any one item, contraband or not, to the prison facility.

With the single rule that it's not an item designed for escape or to harm guards or other inmates, what do you take in with you?

 

[Fro Angel]

Cthulhu deff Cthulhu
He knows alot about imprisonment

 

[Lord George]

This would be good.

 

[Pimppeter2]

900000 kilos of crack.

What? I'd give it away for free and everyone would like me then.

Or a Tank...They're fun.

 

[Krion_Vark]

Nuke. Just because when I set it off I am not the only one to die.

 

[pantallica95]

My iPod. 5000+ songs, stand up videos, and some movies==no boredom. Or an acoustic guitar. Hmmm...decisions!

 

[The Maddest March Hare]

Mini-Nuke.

Pretend it's one of those rugby ball with a fin things that you can throw really far and they make a noise. (The name completely escapes me).

Within a day I could've "accidentally" missed a throw with it and blow a hole in the wall. Tally-ho!

 

[Novania]

I bring the internet

 

[Vampire cat]

Enough sleeping pills to put myself to sleep. Permanently. A life in prison is no life.

 

[Holy_Handgrenade]

This would be good.

Or shoved up Rick's bottom! Cookie for the source.

and on subject I would have a time machine and stop myself commiting the crime or a holy handgrenade.

 

[Dana22]

Ebook Reader with few gigs of literature.

 

[Kasawd]

The Flux Capacitor.

No, really, though, probably the collective works of Edgar Allan Poe(Both to read and club people with).

 

[Wardnath]

My iPod. 5000+ songs, stand up videos, and some movies==no boredom. Or an acoustic guitar. Hmmm...decisions!

Beat me to it.

But yeah, I agree.

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

A chastity belt, for those soap-dropping moments in the shower.

 

[Odd Water]

Maybe an Ever-last Chasity Belt like in Robin Hood: Men in Tights?

 

[Feriluce]

My PC obviously? What else can provide endless hours of entertainment?

 

[Trivun]

Easy - the Lancrastian Army Knife. Since King Verence keeps demanding poor Shaun Ogg add even more to it at every turn, with all the various ideas he has, the knife is bound to have both a lockpick and a crossbow on it somewhere. Those are all I need to facilitate an escape... .

And to anyone saying they'll bring things like Cthulhu? You do realise that by this point the Lancrastian Army Knife will undoubtedly have Eldritch-Abomination-Destroyer tools installed by now...?

 

[Mr.Petey]

If anyone's seen Naked Gun 3 1/3 the final insult then I'm having those iron shower pants Frank wore in the showers. Else I'll end up walking funny for the rest of my jailbird/***** days

 

[Pyrignis]

A pumpkin... if it exists